Gender pronoun names

I had a similar experience with my family over break so it's interesting that this happened to you too. In that instance, I was talking about what my favorite parts of this class has been so far and reading "The New Gender Workbook" came up as one of them. When I was describing to my family all of the different gender pronouns I had learned about, they were taken aback somewhat by why someone would spend so much time trying to define themselves and seemingly form their lives around this one identity. Both of my parents expressed that they felt that people who focused their lives around their identities - whether it be race, sex, religion, sexual preference, etc. - were not truly achieving social change. As my Dad put it, he is friends and works with people based on their values. In his case that would probably be someone who believes in social justice, equality, activism, and the need to speak up and out. While I wasn't totally surprised to see my parents respond this way (it seems like many adults in their age group are having trouble understanding this change in the use of gender pronouns) I was a bit thrown by their reaction to me bringing up the possibility that if I had a baby, I might not assign it a gender. My parents felt strongly towards the idea that by not assigning said baby a gender, they would grow up confused, feeling like an "it". I had never realized up to that moment that either of my parents identified with their gender so strongly and to the point that they felt like if it hadn't been expected of them, they wouldn't be who they are now. I wouldn't characterize either of my parents as conforming to gender roles per se. They switch things up in terms of which personality traits/actions are traditionally associated with men and women. So in that sense I wouldn't view either of my parents as being traditionally feminine or masculine. I realize now though that over the years, their identities have been expressed and emphasized to them over and over again. For example, during the 1970s, my mother was teen who was encountering both feminism and the black power movement at full force. It was empowering and unifying for her to identify as a black feminist. Conversely, my father knows that as a white, cisgender male, he has been afforded certain privileges and advantages that my mother has not been given. So in this sense I can see how growing up in a different era/time period has affected their perception of certain actions. However, that question of how important is identity, starts to come into play again. My experience with my family didn't feel too polarizing for me because they genuinely tried to understand what I was learning and where I was coming from. Each of us made good points, some of which can be saved for another post, and they did agree with a good number of the points that our class had made from our readings. I don't know about you, but my family likes to use humor in many of our discussions, so much of this conversation took place with us making light-hearted jokes at one another that in many instances turned into moments of understanding. For example, my mom told me how back when she was growing up, people who didn't consider themselves to be male or female where called "shim". Another one of them was that for the first time ever, I'm possibly the most progressive person in my immeadiate family. And let me tell you, that status is pretty hard to achieve. I believe that with stronger arguments, more examples, and better explanations (it can be hard to out talk professors...) I will be able to help my family understand the importance of gender neutral/open pronouns.