Serendip is an independent site partnering with faculty at multiple colleges and universities around the world. Happy exploring!
This Is Your Brain on Porn: Pornography Addiction, Society, and the Brain
Many of my drug using, sex crazed friends have said at least once that having an orgasm and doing a line of cocaine create the same feelings within the brain. I am able to understand why there is a chemical change when participating in a sexual act, but I cannot comprehend how people can be addicted to pornography, which has virtually no interaction with the viewer. Sexual acts that one partakes in, like all activities that one partakes in, changes the chemical reactions and firing rates in the brain; so why is it that viewing pornography, which is a mainly optical activity, can change the brain, and even more than that, create an addiction? Simply put, pornography addiction is the “abuse and overuse” (1) of various types of pornography; however, on a deeper level it is a very complicated subject. It raises both medical and social questions, and it is uncertain if the answers to these questions will ever be agreed upon. It is one of the few addictions that are just considered to be a psychological addiction; possibly because of that, most doctors do not consider it an actual addiction, but instead as a sub-condition of obsessive compulsive disorder (1).
While it is not considered a legitimate disease by many, pornography addiction does have similar symptoms: those affected are not able to control how often they engage in the behavior, engage in it to rid themselves of stress, work up a tolerance to it, and engage in the behavior instead of having social and personal interactions (1). These symptoms, especially the ultimate, have been exacerbated by the drastic increase of internet porn, which makes the medium readily available in the privacy of one’s own home. The extra convenience has occurred hand in hand with increasing opposition, stating that pornography in the home has effects on not only the person viewing it, but also those who stumble upon it, such as children. Many see it as a perversion of the home, and not as a real disease.
Another aspect of the addiction that makes it scientifically legitimate is the changes that occur in the brain when one engages in activities involving pornography. When an addict looks at porn, testosterone, dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin are released, creating what Dr. Judith Reisman refers to as an “erototoxin” (2). The chemical change, which causes the person engaging in the act to have a temporary feeling of euphoria, becomes a necessity for the person to function. Like any other type of addict, porn addicts become trapped within their disorder, and the difference between casually watching pornography and being an addict hinges on the chemical makeup of the brain.
Pornography addiction is still very controversial, because the issue of its existence is still being constantly disputed. Scientists and moralists are entangled in a possibly endless argument, both publicly and privately, over the legitimacy of the addiction, as well as the differences between pornography addiction and other addictions, such as drug or alcohol addictions. While Dr. Judith Reisman agrees that viewing pornography causes a chemical change within the brain, she also believes that these changes will create a physical deterioration along with the psychological effects; however, as a critic of Reisman pointed out, “One unmentioned implication [of Reisman’s article] is the fact that, if sexual arousal from pornography causes 'brain damage', then so will real-life sex” (2). Since there is a reasonable possibility that having sex and viewing porn cause the same sort of stimulation in the brain, it would make sense that every time one engages in sex, one loses part of one’s mental faculties. Currently, there is no data to prove that this is true, and it appears as if there is no affirmative data about viewing pornography as well. Another issue of an addiction to porn is that while, with most drugs, it is possible to work all of the chemical out of the body after a certain amount of time, a pornographic image will stay in the memory as long as the memory exists. In a far more extreme interview, Dr. Judith Reisman stated, “[Pornography] could be more addictive than crack cocaine because cocaine can be excreted from the body. Pornographic images cannot. They remain, structurally and neurochemically, with a person forever” (3). She, as well as many others who believe that pornography addiction has more detrimental effects than other types of addiction, take the issue of addiction out of the scientific, and drag it into the sociopolitical. n
Personally, the research for this paper has raised more questions than it has answered. I am still unsure as to why it is considered a disease that branches out from obsessive compulsive disorder, as opposed to being on its own as a disorder. All addictions are obsessive, but not all are part of another disorder. It seems to me as if the squalor surrounding pornography addiction, not its scientific merit, has prevented it from becoming its own legitimate psychological disease. This has caused me to question how addictions are understood and proceeded with in both scientific and social realms, and also to understand that the variables of what determines a disease are not necessarily solely based on science or facts; much more plays into a disease than I had ever contemplated, especially ones that relate to something as that is discussed so much socially, morally, and politically, such as pornography.
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pornography_addiction
- http://www.mindhacks.com/blog/2005/07/attack_of_the_porno.html
- http://www.ewtn.com/library/ISSUES/REALKINS.HTM
Remote Ready Biology Learning Activities
Remote Ready Biology Learning Activities has 50 remote-ready activities, which work for either your classroom or remote teaching.
About Student Papers
| This paper reflects the research and thoughts of a student at the time the paper was written for a course at Bryn Mawr College. Like other materials on Serendip, it is not intended to be "authoritative" but rather to help others further develop their own explorations. Web links were active as of the time the paper was posted but are not updated. |
What's New? Subscribe to Serendip Studio
A Random Walk
New Topics
-
3 weeks 6 days ago
-
4 weeks 2 days ago
-
4 weeks 2 days ago
-
4 weeks 2 days ago
-
4 weeks 2 days ago
Comments
The short of it is. Porn does
The short of it is. Porn does eat away at your soul, you see every time you engage in it a image is engraved in your soul (mind, will, and emotions) and before long there is a composite image built in you from all the images YOU put there through porn. Now your desires have you chasing something that doesn't exists, that's why you can never get enough of it, and you're forced to act it out. That's why in our society today EVERYTHING revolves around sex. Out of all the things we can fail at or do wrong we may pay a small price for it, but when it comes to sexual failure you loose everything in one shot, and that's what porn is designed to do. It stills your mind then your body through disease. Now. You or anyone who will read this and choose not to believe it that's fine, just keep doing what you're doing and watch what happens. I have a full teaching on this for anyone that is interested
Stay strong...satan is trying
Stay strong...satan is trying to tear you apart and God is more powerful. The are literally MILLIONS of americans who suffer from the same thing. Please tell someone trustworthy and know that I am praying for you.
The biggest thing for you
The biggest thing for you right now is to swallow your pride, and quit torturing yourself over a few mistakes. Turn to God with your whole heart, go to confession, fast and pray. My goodness, you're only in the eighth grade -- you've got your whole life ahead of you. Realize that Jesus loves you more than you can know, talk to Him in the morning, and just try to live each day well. Figure out what you'd like to do, and focus your energy on that. Mathematics is a very rewarding subject, for instance.
Best wishes.
Oliver
dear connor, please don't get
dear connor,
please don't get disappointed but u should thank god that he has made u realized ur mistake so early.u have just wasted only two precious years of ur life. there are people like me who didn't even realized this mistake for years and when they realized it was too late.dear connor u r in std 8th ur life is ahead for u just take a revolution in ur heart and say no to porn and m.bcoz of porn and m feel u guilty, u will be stressed , u will not be able to concentrate on ur studies and sports and most important is when u grow up ,when u will actually experience a real sexual life u will be a loser. and if u quit these two things u will have a healthy and happy life, u will do better in ur stuides and sports. so choice is urs what kind of life u want.Dear connor i was brainy child but i ended up as an average child in my life bcoz of these two things. please don't ruin ur life .kindly consider my advice as ur experinced brothers advice.
Bashing the bishop
Dear Connor,
Don't be worrying about all of this stuff. It is a difficult time when you are young, and you get horney all of the time, and sometimes you're just physically arroused and it has nothing to do with anything in your head. I am British (Irish descent) and was sort of bought up as a Catholic.
In England, we have a sensible tollerance and observance of various religeons. However, when we have a problem with something, someone, or, ourselves, we seldom mention Jesus. I don't pretend to know whether Jesus existed. I also challenge people to why it's important. I hope he exiseted, and "his" message was a very good one. We intrinsically know what's right and wrong.
When you are dealing with these things, you can rest assured that Jesus and praying, are not going to help. Wanking is good, and I'd say very sensible. However, excercise is also very important - NO MORE SO THEN WHEN YOU ARE YOUNG - and not excerising, and getting out in the sun, which is aslo essential, is the thing which will sort you out.
The problem is that whilst drugs and drinking - also normal if you aren't an American - are an excellent, good laugh, and personal developer, in most instances; however, if not tempered with the absolutely essential excercise, can become a problem.
Cars are not your friend. Again in England, walking to places, solves a lot of this porblem.
In the US, most of you eat rubbish all of the time, which is again, a massive problem. Remember, the EU countries pay a lot in fines to the UN, so that they don't have to import US beef; lots of the prescription drugs are illegal; and most people are not overweight, as a result, but those that are normally aren't really contenders alongside some of the elephants that I see wandling about talking loudly at our tourist loactions. These poor people are killing themselves by eating rubbish chemicals all of the time.
Again, fixating about women all of the time is totally normal. Hopefully you are lucky enough not to be fixating on men. Just think about how confused the non-normal urges must be to handle. They are in the increase, and they are at the considerably less harmful end of the spectrum. I know it feels awkward when you bump into them the next day but that's just one of those things.
Guilt, thereby comes into the picture. You are in the situation that you are in as you are young and can't get to do what you want due to social constraignts, such as living at home, and having to go to school, there being nothing to do, etc.. Remember, none of this is your fault. It is very, very common. I've known a few seemingly normal people, who've confided that they went to Amsterdamme with their dad (and his mates, sometimes), and they got them out a load of hookers, or, went to spain, and managed to use the shared room, on the 'helpful' advice of their parent. This is all a bit weird to me, but you have to think; is this a good thing? I don't think it's that good, and so you have to look at the other end of the spectum, for comparrissions.
Also remember that not getting involved with people out of desperation, is also something which is probably commendable. I know a lot of people who threw their lives away due to wanting to get their ends away, so they started going out with someone when they were to young to get a job, or have finished the basic things to secure alright money for their future. THis can work out, but almost never does.
Religeons pray on gulit. Society plays on people's fear and guilt to control them. If you dispel guilt, so much that it is something which you realize was totally misplaced on this type of minor, unavoidable stuff, your life will get better, and you wont' be feeling bad, etc..
One other thing you might like to try would be cutting out meat for a month, and seeing how that goes. Meat creates a lot of acid in the body, as does milk, and other dairy products. I eat both quite a lot, but these thigns definitely do effect your health and moods. I think, whilst they're nice, once you stop using them, you don't really remember why you ever liked them.
Let me know how you get on, and no praying - about this - in the meantime. If you get any silly ideas that God wants you to bothering him about some woman who you'd like to do things to, who he made you fancy, then you need to remember that he's not a petty moron, so don't treat him like he is. If he exists, he's going to be very annoyed with all of his apparent devout followers, who think he wants to be bothered about their and young men on forum's sexual thoughts. If he knows everythign this will annoy him. He will be thinking that their petty self-centred fixations are out of line with things such as murdering loads of people in foreign countries, for no reason.
Wanking will not get a look in.
You need milk for calcium
You need milk for calcium without it you are stressed all the time. You need meet for just about everything else in your body. God is not a matter of belief anymore, God IS real. The Creator and religion can nowdays be proven logically and scientifically. He made men and women, but set certain rules. It's what seperates us from animals, and saves us a lot of trips to the shrink. ;) God also wouldn't want us developing any addictions or wasting energy he gave us, when we can use our healthy being to be of use on this earth. Harm to self is harm done to others.
You are NOT a bad person.
Hi I was researching this due to my topic for a paper I am working on and stumbled across your reply to the article.
You are not a bad person and are not any of those things that you described yourself as. Everyone goes through times of weakness where something might have gotten out of hand. But what is important and commendable to you is that you realize that you have a problem. So it can only get better, as you try to break the habit which you will.
Take an outsider's perspective.
Good luck.
answer
all ways ask the holy spirt to guide you ,the problem is you want be able to getout of it at once and specially trying by your self only the lord can help you listen to him at first it will be very hard but just obey him you will deffanetly get out off it just prey and give the problem to him and from the next day dont prey for the same thing just thank him every day for getting you out off it and thats what satan hates you having faithin jesus even befor he gives the solution always remember satan like a roaring lion is waiting till you go out from the flock of jesus to grab you and eat you will also prey for you
if need any help you can write to
i had the same problem and jesus saved me!
:(
I have been addicted for about 3 years.... I am 15 now. Please pray for me... i ask god all the time but it never seems to go away, even with faith, i will not stop praying, i know god has a plan for me... one day he will take it away :( please pray, i became christian again a month ago, but im still addicted. I love god and i dont want to break his heart :(
its a soul destroyer
hi ive been addicted to porn a long time.....im 24. I first started watching porn when i was 16 then my habit grew and grew to the point where I knew I had a problem. Porn does destroy your innocence and it can turn anyone into a monster. My porn addiction was bad before and one time I was watching tv and then the porn idea came to mind and I started to browse and stuff and then I felt the monster being fed. I then grabbed my laptop and took it out to the park and smashed it to bits. I then went home and felt better. If i ever have children I will warn them of this evil in sheep clothing before they get caught up in it.The best way i found to deal with this problem was to ask God for forgiveness of my sick fantasies and try my hardest to not look at that garbage. Once I was looking at porn everyday i felt sick inside when i was completly healthy. Remember to ask God to forgive you and give you strength to fight off the addiction. Once yoou start doing this on a regular basis you WILL feel better trust me.
I was addicted to porn for 15
I was addicted to porn for 15 yrs, I'm now 34 yrs old and haven't a wife or girlfriend because of all that wasted time in front of the computer. This year I went on an alpha coarse at my local church, where we prayed about my addiction, later that week I was about to go onto the net again and look at porn and I prayed for help and I all of a sudden I felt the holy spirit descend apron me! and since then I have been a totally different person, and my porn habit has dissapeared. I know there are people out there thinking this is a rubbish story and all that, however it's absolutely the truth. I suggest you do the same, find out from friends which is a good church to go to in you're area and go on the alpha coarse, what do you have to loose!
Cheers
Mark
Addictive Personality Disorder
What you've experienced is very common, although it can show through a million different ways.
What you're suffering from is not Pornography addiction, it's just addictive personality disorder. Instead of porn it could've been drugs, or anything really.
It's not the porn itself that's the problem, it's often the people watching it sad to say. I myself have problems with addictive personality disorder, but I went to a therapist through contacting my schoolnurse at a pretty low age(early teens). I got rid of my problems but I can't for example drink alcohol or do things that gives you adrenaline kicks, I easilly get addicted to it.
This disorder is something as I said very common, it just takes different forms, and I think it's wrong to blame the things you get addicted to actuallly, because many people can handle it just fine, you just have to know for yourself what's right. Sorry If I offended you or your beliefs in anyways, but hey what would we do without freedom of speech!
The Only Way Out: Jesus Christ.
Jesus is the only way out of this. The non-religious people may disagree and tell you that you can do it by going to the doctor's office and setting an appointment for psychiatric help. This will not do my friends. I don't care how smart you think you are. I don't care how strong you believe you are. As a person commented here it's hard for the non-religious people as well. You'll see families destroyed, 40 year marriages flushed down the toilet. This is not a "little" problem that some people would like to think. It's not just simply a "hobby." It's a KILLER. It's silent at first but then slowy decays and shoots you up with venomous toxin that will eat away at your life. Most people might even know at first that their significant other is acted to porn. Until it's too late. The side effects of porn are terrible. I read an article stating that everything in your mind gets stored for later use. This would make sense to everyone right? I've been a porn addict for quite awhile. I started really young. I started at around 10 or 11. I would watch some of my father's videos and then when I got into high school it got worse. I would masturbate everyday. Porn gave me such a blurred image that I would look for new pornstars to masturbate to. These images do get stored in your head people. You can be at work, college, high school, or anywhere. I've had images pop up in my head from time to time for really no apparent reason. You know how when you think everything is going ok? Then all the sudden. Bam! It hits you. How did that thought get there? Blame it on porn. It's highly addictive and VERY hard to get out of. Most people end up failing because they have no hope. They think they can't get out of it. They are broken inside and there seems like no way out. ONLY THROUGH JESUS WILL YOU GET OUT OF THIS MESS. That's the only way. There is no miracle cure, there is no antidote you can drink. This is the only way. Look, I don't care if you disagree with me. Jesus is the only way you'll get out of this addiction. Jesus can beat any addiction. He Loves You. He cares for you. The porn industry does not give a rat's behind about you. Trust someone who loves you. Trust Jesus. God Bless.
Porn adiction
You are absolutely right only Jesus can heal you from porn adiction because it is inherently a sin which satan brings upon us and therefore we need to fight it in the spiritual realm and not the physical level or the flesh. I was hooked on porn for most of my life and I am now 56 y/o. A couple of months ago I repented my adiction and my pastor and I prayed together and I took my adiction and laid it down at the cross and asked Jesus to wash me clean in his blood. We prayed for the cleansing of every sensory organ which I used in pornography to get rid of the memories of all the photos and videos i watched. I was a compulsive masturbator and could not stop despite the fact that I am married and and have children it drove me towards gay activities more and more. You never get enough and you get compelled to explore more and more new avenues to get new sensations and therefore it destroyes you systematically and that is what satan wants to do. I invited Jesus into my heart and became reborn which means that The Holy Spirit now lives in my heart and He helps me to stay clean and helps me to dampen the feelings of lust. I have vertually stopped masturbating and now begin to have normal sexual feelings toward my wife the way it should be. Every time a image pops up in your mind its satan trying to win you over to start again. With Jesus in your heart satan is weak and cannot touch you. All you should do is to command that image to leave your mind in the name of Jesus and see the result. For those people not believing me, open your eyes please because Jesus is there waiting for you to only say to him to please come into your life and He will do so and change your life to something you could not have imagined. Praise the Lord for what and who He is, the Great Healer of all times. Amen and Halleluja !!!!!!
lulz@u
(Athene's Theory of Everything -)
Based off your comment, I doubt you may be able to understand the implications of this video I posted above and about the state of the cognitive mind. Your argument is entirely subjective as religious fanaticism and has ZERO supporting scientific claims. Spirituality is a primary source of dissonance within this world for those in need of real answers. Placing your faith in abstract creationist stories, and guiding your ethical values based off emotional attachments to a system of beliefs is what has promoted your addiction in the fist place. You think your mind is free behind your shield of god however you are not free under this delusion. Your cognitive dissonance has lead you to a state of denial where you use religion as a curtain to justify what is reality. If you truly wish to overcome an addiction such as pornographic addiction you must analyze what is the root cause of the problem. Masturbation or pornography is not an act of sin or evil, such labeling is not constructive to the scientific mind nor towards finding a resolution for the problem.
Excessive engagement of masturbation can be a cause for concern if it is effecting your personal lives. It is your choice and duty to know what you want. If this truly is a problem the best method of fixing it is through social validation. Through feeling acceptance of others you will actively be getting a healthier fix of the similar chemicals released during masturbation. Social validation stimulates the dopamine receptors in the brain and increases serotonin levels while activating and increasing the function of reward neurons. This decreases emotional fixation and irrational labeling leading to an increase in the ability to become self-aware. This is a first step towards a better healthier life. Surround yourself with others who share similar values and learn the importance of trust. Consider taking up a constructive hobby or enroll in a local university and engage in the exchange of ideas with others. Attending church is also a great way to feel validation, however you should not focus on the hand of god as a medical cure. All of these are good ways to gain validation and progress towards a more healthy emotional and physical lifestyle.
Do not take for granted to capabilities of the human mind. Neuro-plasticity can allow you to accomplish any feat of mental aptitude as hard effort physically transforms your neural pathways increasingly towards performing a single task with extreme efficiency.
Jesus Christ is in your mind. Human Beings are Gods.
The Root of the Problem
And in your last statement, you have analyzed the root of the problem. "Human beings are Gods." Humans chose themselves to be God in the beginning of the world. And because of that, what we were created to rule over now rules us. Sex was created to be used in a worshipful way to God between one man and one woman. But now, humans use this thing that was created to be the ultimate intimacy and completely abuse it, sharing their most intimate physical, mental, and emotional parts of their being with others over the internet. As the brother above stated, it is a venom that will destroy you. It has physical, emotional, and spiritual consequences, and it will kill you. "Jesus Christ is in your mind." He's in everyones mind, they just suppress the truth of it. But don't forget, He's also seated at the right hand of His Father, the Creator of everything. He swallowed the full wrath of God against the sin of man on the cross. The curtain of the Holy of Holies, the dwelling place of God was split from the top to bottom. God's dwelling place is with men now. And then Jesus of Nazareth was raised from the dead, and ascended into heaven. And ANY man who believes in Him will be made a co-heir of His inheritance, and a partaker in the Spirit of the Living God. He saves porn addicts. He saves those who reject his name. And more than that He transforms them into a new being not of this world, but of His coming kingdom. He's not about debating and arguing for His place of glory. He died to have that spot. And what do you do? What do we all do? We say that He didn't exist. We say science is God. We say we are God. Well, science hasn't brought anyone back from the dead. And I guarantee you that science isn't going to have an answer for when He cracks the sky.
"Human Beings are Gods." You might want to take that paper crown off your head, cause the real King is coming back, and He's not sharing His glory. Every knee will bow, every tongue will praise Him. And everyone will be judged for what they have done. And if Christ hasn't eaten Your judgement, then it's gonna be dumped on Your plate.
Seriously, look at nature more closely.
If now sex was created by something, homosexuality was also created, aswell as the mind even being able produce sexual fantasies. Then that means all of these things are actually a part of humanity. Whatever you may think, homosexuality is actually something rather common in nature, especially among primates such as ourselves.
It's somewhat of nature's own way of birthcontrol.
Aswell as to the statement you were answering, I would say God is just something humans made up a long time ago to explain things like feelings or how the world came to be. Which to me seems pretty naive to believe in this day and age, it just seems like people are not willing to open their eyes. Because if you think about it, if humans created God(which they obviously did), then we are Meta-Gods which means we're more powerful than God could ever be. This shows through us being able to not accept God as truth, which is something that means that we could kill God's influence over mankind, therefore we're more godlike than God himself.
This might seem somewhat over the top philosophic but that's exactly what religion is, philosophy with a touch of fanaticm. (Just my five cents).
Masturbation or pornography is not an act of sin or evil
hahahha wow I sure wish that were true. Perhaps you are right, masturbation or porn is not a sin; unless you look at it and do it. of course the topic of conversation is controlling masturbation so uh yah....
1 Peter 4:1-2 (NIV) Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God.
Eph 5:3 (NIV) But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people.
Thank goodness porn is not related to sexual immortality or impurity. Whewww. hahahhahaha. all the porn I have seen is clean. LOL
Matt 5:28-29 (NIV) [Jesus:] "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."
Yah so uh huh Masturbation or pornography is not a sin - yes, according to an atheist. but if you believe in Jesus Christ - the Bible clearly states the truth!
Day 4
I've been an addict for the last 20 years and trying again to quit.
Day 4 has been absolutely horrible. :(
I can't believe its only been 4 days and how bad the withdrawal symptoms are.
Anybody know how to manage these difficult days? Serotonin pills? Vitamin C?
Help!
'all men watch porn' is the
'all men watch porn' is the most absurdly ridiculous statement i've ever hear anyone make.
My experience
I feel my brain drained out after 1-2 hours of porn. Moreover, after a while, masturbation over porn becomes inevitable. I am not religious and am rather anti-religious. But this problem is among both religious and non-religious people. It's not related to the beliefs. One might fall on the ground even if he/she does believe he might get dirty!! Religious people find themselves shameful in front of their respective God, and non-religious ones find themselves guilty in front of themselves, their visions, wife, etc.. This adds up to the pressure and to escape it one finds porn the instant relief again!
Adding the drainage resulting from masturbation that will eventually accompany porn, it is devastating. I often miss classes in the univesity for I cannot get up soon in the morning. Porn and masturbation are both joyful but draining. That's why watching it eventually BECOMES addiction in your hard times in life.
It takes one's will to life. Will to win. It takes your will and gives you a little plessure and space to escape.
How to deal with it??
I love porn. I love masturbating. I've done it since I was 15. But now I have a woman in my life I can see how much of a waste it really is. I want to save myself for her.... and I love how she makes my cock throb so much more than watching a porn movie.
I've realised that real sex involves a proper connection of mind body and soul. I also believe that masturbating can actually dissolve your mind body and soul when abused. It's ok for some stress relief, once a week or so. But i think it really draws from your body. It leaves you faded. the hormnoes just fry your brain and you feel dazed and over dopamined.
I want to know if there is some sort of counter balance. Is there a supplement hormone that can counter balance the act of over stimulation from porn???? Like Methadone for the Crack Head. Because I think porn really can have that much of a dramatic effect on someone. It can literally warp your mind!!
My soon to be husband is addicted to porn
I have been pain behind this situation for 4 years now. I have talked to him and he says it will stop. I have found all kinds of porn, from adult, to animal, to teen, and kid porn on everything that gets internet in my house. The computer has a ton, Itouch, cell phones, constant mags with celebs , and when he thinks i'm sleeping I see him even on the tv trying to look at everything he can info merchials on weight loss, bra commercials, anything to where there is alot of skin showing. It is driving me crazy, now i', at the point where i dont even enjoy sex with him because i know he is not having sex in his mind with me. I feel ugly, old, fat, and not attractive at all. I see men look at me now and feel i look so ugly thats why there looking. It has made me depressed and sad all the time. I cant even think about anything else. I also noticed he is getting coffee with expresso shots 3 at a time in a small before work along wih energy drinks constantly. Does that have anything to do with it also? Please help.
My Soon to be Husband
I am not a doctor... yet. I am very interested in this topic. I was married for 5 years to a man that was the same way. He was addicted yet ashamed to admit it to anyone. It eventually took over his desires where we did not have sex hardly at all and we are now divorced. I am a very attractive smart woman with the so called "perfect model measurements". Not to sound like I am bragging. I just want you to understand that it is not you because for the longest time I blamed myself for HIS ADDICTION problems. He completely neglected me, making me feel as though I was not good enough or skinny enough. I always compared myself to what he was looking at. Now that we are divorced and I am away from all the trash he allowed in our marriage. I am so much happier. I know that I am beautiful and an amazing woman. I am above porn and demand respect. If your soon to be husband does not get control of this problem and admit that it is a problem and seek help, IT WILL CAUSE MORE PROBLEMS IN THE FUTURE! Research is now finding where more and more men are complaining of Erectile Dysfunction (ED). This disease is normal for men in there late 50s or older. However, more and more yound men are dealing with this issue. It is all linked back to PORN. Compulsive porn users overstimulate the rewards system in the brain. This lowers the dopamine chemical produced in their brain... taking away their sex drive and eventually taking the erect out of there penis. I am not saying this to scare anyone, but to inform people. Its an easy fix... just stay away from porn. There is something in life called moderation. If you can't control it, don't do it or it will become an addiciton. It has been proven with these patients that once they sustain from porn from 6-12 weeks and interact with the people and not the internet, eventually the brain will rewire itself and those sensations will come again and their penis will work... AS IT SHOULD at such a young age. Their sex drive will return to normal. Its mind over matter! If you want it bad enough, you can stop the addiction. Just a little advice for you... I wouldn't get married if you are facing these problems now. It will only make matters worse in the future. Take from me... Been there, done that! Hope you can see yourself as a beautiful woman and not let the evil influences have control over your mind. YOU ARE MORE THAN THAT AND DESERVE MORE THAN THAT OUT OF LIFE!!!!!
And just to update you on my now ex-husband, since Sept 08, he still has not been able to sustain a relationship with a woman, nor sustain a good job and a home. He is very unstable and will remain unstable and unhappy until he seeks help and learns to handle his addictive behavior problems that control his life.
Thanks.
Im married and I (husband) want to beat this so bad and absolutly have added my wife to this to help me. Shes a perfect woman inside and out, including young (18, im 25)
She is determined to help and see me through this, and I know if I wasnt determined to beat this, I would have left her for her own good long ago...you definitely did the right thing in leaving your ex after five years of this bullshit, I know my wife would stay with me forever no matter what, but I could never put her through this HELL for long.
I dont know yet how Im going to quit, but I do know if I cant, Im gonna die.
Its the worst thing Ive ever had to deal with, and I hate it more than you cause I hate it not just because its making me feel ugly and not like the perfect 10, I hate it because its taken away all the feeling and life out of me.
But it owns me.
Men. We dont know what we did, but thanks for hating us.
Be Careful!
I want to share some information with you that I think is very important. Research suggests that 50% of men who view heterosexual pornography are able to not 'act out' but that is not the case for child pornography viewing which you hopefully understand is also illegal. If your soon to be husband is watching child porn you need to quickly regroup and discontinue the relationship as there is a 95%-100% chance he is also 'acting out' with children which brings up the second thing you need to do. You need to turn his computer into the police. Children need to be protected and you need to also protect yourself and any children you know. Run and protect your heart from future pain. I encourage you to find help and support as soon as possible.
this is bogus
kid porn is not somehow a gateway to going and getting a kid anymore than watching bdsm videos leads to going out and taking a woman hostage! yes people who have done it in real life are also video watchers...but thats like saying because 99% of black prisoners listen to rap, that rap leads to jail for all listeners!
rapist that take women hostage and hold them for bdsm sessions will have similar porn in their house i bet you that. let me make this clear... in any culture..including the usa...when laws are laxed, women are raped..including children. this is so in 3d world countries, in the neighboring americas such as mexico, also in asia, and very much so in africa.
when the military in this wonderful land go to poor countries to fight our men have participated in sex that is shunned or illegal here..including iraq. they felt no one was looking and they did it.
so am i saying all are rapists or molesters? no. just like all are not theives but let a bad verdict or natural disaster hit and people that have never stolen an their lives join looters.
listen if you have a porn issue and you have or had limewire..youre no stranger to kid porn. thats the truth. limewire is on millions of teen computers for music. when you do a search...regardless of what you put..kiddie porn is in your results as well as regular porn. you think a teen boy hasnt ever clicked that stuff? youd be wrong. i installed internet for customers. i have yet to see a home with a teen that doesnt reveal porn activity in cache...yes...i looked to see if it was there. boys watch porn if the computer is isolated in a room
people with sex addiction need help BEFORE they do something physical from adultery to homosexuality to rape or yes.. kids. but its like people wait till you are in jail to help
He has a very serious
He has a very serious addiction problem. If things are that bad you should not marry him. Porn is such a difficult addiction to deal with because watching it can act exactly like a drug. You could consider him just like a drug addict, the drug is coming in through his eyes. It is at once a chemical addiction (inside the brain) and an obsessive/compulsive thing.
thankyou
Thankyou so much, that is exactly what I thought but to hard for me to deal with it.
I know I have too, it just hurts so much. You have been very helpful.
Porn Addiction Impact
if you feel that porn is starting to have a negative impact on your life, if you're missing school, or work, or spending long hours at night up watching porn and missing out the next day.. this is a sign that things are getting out of hand.
Please do get help. Porn addiction is involved in more than 60% of divorces in the US today. Do not neglect this "cancer" so to speak.
I highly recommend as a resource and education for pornography addiction and how to overcome it.
Porn Addiction is Harmful
There has been an increased amount of research work recently on the impact of pornography on the brain, the individual, and on marriage... Some lawyers in NY while talking about case opportunities discussed that 60 of divorces recently have something to do with porn addiction. And this mostly on the male side. While porn addiction is tough to beat, it is not impossible and there exists a certain procedure and recovery one can take to overcome it. I highly recommend checking out :
The answer is to get help. you can't do this alone.
Porn addiction is a terrible thing. If you justify it in any way (shame on you), that's your decision, but this site is for those that actually SUFFER from this addiction! Don't come here and tell us your opinion about how it's okay because WE DON'T CARE! WE'RE IN PAIN, AND WE'RE LOOKING FOR HELP!
I don't think porn is limited to visual imagery. I don't think there is anyone who lives in our modern technological world that at some time hasn't participated in it somehow, whether it be reading steamy romance novels, dirty conversations with friends, or the extremely popular late night porn sessions. I call it an addiction, and not a hobby or a habit, because it has been scientifically proven to restructure the physical brain in similar ways to tobacco, alcohol, and drug addictions.
My suggestion is to talk about it with someone who understands and won't take it personally, but also won't disregard the seriousness of the situation. I had been suffering from this addiction for nearly 10 years (much of my personal addiction might be considered to some tame, but I'm aroused when I see fully clothed girls if they wear too tight of clothing or let too much skin show, so I consider that part of my addiction). When I first became addicted at the age of 12, my mother didn't understand, nor could I expect her to. But after going through years of counseling to understand the way the mind works, she finally understood, and was able to help. She explained to me that I am not my addiction. It really is a form of slavery, because you'll be going along in your normal life, then suddenly you lose control of yourself. When it's over, you feel terrible because of the selfish nature of what you've done (unless of course you've crossed the threshold of feeling, in which case, I can't feel more sorry for you, because you've given up). But the thing is, it wouldn't be called an addiction unless it has control over you.
To reiterate: it's not you, because it has control over you. You are a wonderful person, you just have to realize it.
Your mind is like a house. An addiction is like an infestation of cockroaches. Some people might not try to clean out the cockroaches for any miriad of reasons. But you have a desire to eradicate the roaches (which is why you are here). So you call the exterminator. The ideal exterminator for this would be the Savior. But the problem with that is that most people who suffer from problems like this don't know how to let the savior in, or feel too guilty to let him in, etc. Christ is the most efficient exterminator, but just like in every field, the most efficient specialist is the most expensive (he requires that you give your whole self to him, which is something that most people have a hard time submitting to, myself included). There are other options. There is the 12-step program for alcoholics, which you can substitute any addiction into. There are counselors you can go to. There are websites just like this one. All these can help you exterminate the roaches. You think that it's incredibly embarrassing to admit to your exterminators how bad you let the roach problem get, but it's such a relief after you do it, and then you and your exterminator can get to work. Soon, you begin to see success, and you feel more wonderful than you ever have. But it's not over, because roaches are hard to kill completely, especially because roaches are more readily drawn to where roaches have been. So you might relapse, but at this point you are fighting. You'll feel more guilty from the relapse than you ever have while caught in the addiction. It's at this point that you need to remember that the roaches aren't you. If you see a roach, is it more efficient to sit down and cry about it? No, because for every second that you waste, that roach is inviting his buddies in. The minute you see a roach, reach for the raid, and keep fighting them. Eventually, fewer and fewer roaches will be showing up, until they are completely eradicated, and you are the victor. When, after years of fighting, you realize that you're not a slave anymore, you'll feel amazing.
If you have decided to accept pornography as a part of your life, good luck. For those who keep fighting, you can make it through!!! YOU ARE NOT THE ROACHES!!!
My husban grow up in the gospel & watch pornography, & be angry
My husband grew up in the gospel. He preaches & found that that he was watching pornography. I notice that when he is not watching porno he is irritable. I been praying to leave him because I'm tired. Las aug he commit adultery. I don't understand why he is not free.
Hallo Christian, It is sad to
Hallo Christian,
It is sad to hear about the story and how porn has made its way into the peace and joy of those destined to enjoy it. Being raised up in the gospel does not necessarily mean that one is immune to the enemies of the Gospel. We live in the world and sometimes we get contaminated by it. If your husband admits to the problem and has a desire to quit, the best thing would be to let him know that you are there for him and will pray all through with him. Do it not because you are his wife but that you are his friend.
God bless
Please learn verb tenses. I
Please learn verb tenses. I cannot take you seriously if you cannot effectively use the English language.
Only God can help you fight pornography
Seven steps to fight against addiction
1 get saved. Romans 7:23
examine yourself if you are in the faith. Am I really saved? you won't know if you are a reprobate.
2 read the Bible Ps 119:9, John 15:3 clean up your mind through his word, eph 5:25-27 washing your
mind through his word - you need your brain washed.
3 get control of your flesh. Rom 8:1,5-10, you cant continue in sin and be pleasing to the Lord.
which part of you wins, the flesh or the spirit? It is the one who is fed the most. Gal 5:16,19-21
1st 4 problems are sexual in nature. 22,23 these fruits of the spirit should be manifest in your life
24 you are supposed to cruxify your flesh as a Christian. Rom 6:19-23
1 pray I thess 5:17- pray without ceasing
2 read the bible John 17:15-17 SANCTIFICATION
3 listen to spiritual music Eph 5:19-20 if you are listening to popular music of this world
then you are hearing graphic sexual references this makes it very hard to control
your flesh
4 get control of your thought life 2 Cor 10:3-5 bring every thought into captivity
5 avoid television and movies from Hollywood. if you think you can watch R rated movies and
you can overcome the addiction of pornography you're kidding yourself (psalms 101:3)
6 evangelism = be too busy serving the Lord to have time to look at porn
redeeming the time bc the days are evil, you need to understand what the will of the
Lord is. God has you here for a purpose. you are not to be unwise.
7 cleanse yourself from all filthiness of the flesh. I'm filthy Lord I need your help
I Cor 9:27. everytime you look at porn your are sowing seeds of pornography.
Galatians 6:7 "Be not deceived, God is not mocked, for whatsoever a man soweth that shall
he also reap."
Sow to the Spirit by reading, praying, listening to good songs
4 avoid secular physchiatric treatment. Col 2:8
5 avoid hotspots for pornography and lust. Prov. 6:7-10 young man void of understanding sets himself
up for a fall. he knows he will be tempted. you are not strong enough to overcome the addiction
of pornography. Do you really need to check things on the internet at 2 in the morning when
everyone is asleep? Find someone you can trust and make them stay in the room when you are on
the internet. If you know the temptation on the internet is so great then you have to do some
radical things. Do you really need to go to the magazine section in the store? get it through a
subscription or go to a store that doesn't have pornography. Do you really need to go to the
beach or the swimming pool? If you have a problem then you need to take radical action. Ps 1:1,2
you might want to get rid of cable tv. It is going to cost you something to serve the lord.
6 realize God has provided a way to escape. no temptation taken you but such as is common to man.
you will always have a way to escape so you can bear it. you can't say God didn't help me. There
is no excuse for falling, and you can't blame God. James 1:12,13 if you endure temptations you
will receive rewards
7 get married. their are natural desires God has given. I Cor 7.
If you are married then you will be extra accountable for your actions.
Don't chain your family by going public with your problem.
Acts 20:32
Don't get to heaven and have this blot on your record
Don't get to heaven and realize you could have done alot more for the Lord if you had taken care of this
problem.
You can overcome, but you have to work very hard at taking steps to defeat this addiction. It is going
to take WAR against your flesh.
I am in the Hell
I have been addicted since the age of 15. I am now 35 years old and I still am and I can't quit. I believe in God. Can anyone help me? :(
Hi there, I was also addicted
Hi there, I was also addicted to porn for many years. I therefore enrolled on an alpha coarse at my local church, and during that coarse I prayed and recieved the holy spirit, the feeling is quiet indescribable when the holy spirit enters you're body, but you will know its him, there's no feeling like it. From then on I've been freed of this evil and I'm a truly happy person. so i therefore suggest you do the same and join an alpha coarse. You will truly fly and stretch you're wings in this journey on earth.
God bless and all the best!
Stuart
hi
I was in the same boat as u are? now I am recovering very well from this shit. I am a muslim and if u believe in God then there should be no problem for u. I am not preaching you Islam, but if you try it, it is the FASTEST way of recovering from this porn addiction.
best of luck
take care
Start Praying
Start praying. God will get you through this. Believe in His son Jesus Christ and get active in chruch, with family, help others. You would be suprised how many there are out there that have this same type of problem. The problem is no one talks to anyone about there problems. Most Christians make it appear as they are "Superman" or I should say "Superhuman" with no flaws whatsoever. I've actually had a little talk about this subject when I was at a Christian event called Aquire the Fire. I was in a hotel room with some of my church friends and the subject came up and we were talking about it and being real with one another passing through thoughts and ideas of how to overcome this addiction. It's an international epidemic. No joke. It's only getting worse.
Prayer is only part of the answer
i have found prayer and acknowledgment of a weakness to God are key first steps to overcoming pornography addiction. However, God is not someone you just confess to from time to time- God is your friend who is with you every moment of the day. The most important thing you need to do to escape pornography addiction is to balance out your life, which mostly means there are a lot of things you should change. Pick up new hobbies like cooking or reading. get involved in community groups like church service organizations or a local cycling club. DO STUFF! be too busy and content physically, socially, and emotionally to even really think about the addiction. If you can make it past two weeks, you can make it every day after then. God bless.
Same Here
I have also been looking at porn for about that long. Maybe we can help one another
Myself
Hellow. This article is very interesting. I have been addicted to porn ever since the third grade and I am now 21. Just recently I was in a relationship with a girl that went over horribly. After she stopped being my friend I suffered from severe anxiety for four months before I finally decided to see a psychologist. Anxiety is a symptom of obsessive compulsive disorder. I used pornography to try and help myself calm my anxiety but it didn't work. I believe that pornography addiction could very well be a sub-condition of obsessive compulsive disorder.
As for my life. Don't worry about it. I have a psychologist and I am beginning to realize the difference between a true friendship and a fake one. I am not over the girl yet, but I am getting there. I hope to be on track again soon. Thanks for the post.
Hey people.....I think all
Hey people.....I think all the negative comments are a bit unjustified.Porn is for adults.Nobody forces nobody to watch porn.It's your decision.If you become addicted to porn,it's only YOU who is to blamed.And fantasizing about a woman,say,the wife of your best friend,is,I THINK,not EVIL.It's just a misconception propagated by religions.It's a very PRIMITIVE idea.I believe there is no evil or good in this world.Everything is relative.
Take it as a means of entertainment.Watch it,enjoy it,fantasize about it and take inspiration from the movies.
Porn really visualises for us fantasies that many wouldn't probably be able to live.Think of it as a movie.You'll enjoy it.
Lastly,I don't think masturbating is a sin.How can anything that gives you pleasure be a sin.All rubbish.
I think this world really needs to change its views on certain things.I think SEXUAL PORN should be allowed to be viewed by everyone,not just adults.This is my firm opinion.
what
What are you talking about porn is terrible. God is the only person who can people with their addictions. Trust god with your addition and you will get over it. Doont get to heaven and hqve this terrible blimish on your record. Respect your self nd GOD enough to stop.
porn is selfishness, and is a mental/mind dis-ease
i am not religious, as religions and "giving yourself" to a saviour or god is the act of giving up on yourself and saying "well i cant do it by myself cuz im scared or lazy, so here you do it for me". not to mention that religion has been around for eons and yet the world is still in a downward spiral, and bc religions create separation and therefore wars, murder, suffering, and allow for greed to be of higher value than life itself, religion itself is truly evil. we are gods, as what is here was and is manifested by each of us and our contribution to the mind consciousness field.
my point is that by using god/jesus/religion as a "cure", you are only actually giving up one selfish addiction/high for another.. consider these things for yourself in honesty and you will see.
as for porn, i to was introduced at an early age, and it has become an unwanted addiction in my mind, that comes out of nowhere, and now that i am jobless it is even worse as i am more often anxious and dont have anything to occupy my time..
the true cure to porn is the same cure to every addiction and every problem in this world. self-awareness, self-honesty, and self-forgiveness/correction. but its much easier said than done of course. however, we have to start somewhere. the place to start is with this question: 'What is good, and what is evil.' there are many answers to this questions, but all but one are generated from the life blood in the present system--money. good has become an idea to most of that which either serves one directly or indirectly in regards to their desires and/or money since enough money will buy any artificial desire. so "good" has become profit or self-gain/self-interest. for if one forgoes this way of thinking, well they will soon be broke, homeless and starving to death, especially in a capitalist society where its always a competition and the only way to "succeed" is to capitalize on someone else, and essentially say fuck them, i want it and i dont give a fuck about them, just me.
so now we live in a world of de-mans who are addicted to all of the 7 sins, all of which can be summed up into 2 words: self-interest. every addiction is created from self-interest, otherwise you wouldnt waste the time and energy. the ego program will try to keep you from ever realizing this truth, and thus giving yourself to a higher god (that only exists in your mind btw) so that you can continue beinhg selfish, but now without shame or remorse bc "you gave yourself to god, etc" its one form of masturbation for another, and one addiction for another--like a coke head who gives up coke and starts doing meth, but if meth were something that is forced down your throat by greed mongers and invoke fear for anyone who disagrees with every single word... question everything, believe nothing if you want to find yourself and the truths of this world.
so bottom line is that porn is an addiction and it is very dangerous. dont judge yourself for thinking about it or giving in to it, or you will never overcome it. and dont give it up for another addiction, or you will never actually achieve self-awareness. take it one day at a time, and be honest with yourself about it, and forgive/correct yourself by reaffirming that it is not who you are, and nothing controls you but you.
i recommend the teachings at desteni.co.za for processes and assistance and support of others who can help you find yourself and overcome any addiction.
so for the definition of Right and Wrong:
Right is what is good/serves ALL LIFE EQUALLY, Wrong is everything else. it is that simple, yet that complex as the process of truly realizing how each thought and action we allow from ourselves is or isnt good for ALL equally. we participate in a system that destroys life and allows BILLIONS of humans to starve, and many more animals and plants/the earth to suffer every day. defining what is good take effort and honesty, thats all, but no one will do it for you. so its your "free" choice, but remember that its not free, as every time we feed a corrupt system that allows so many to suffer, they pay the price every day, and for our selfishness to ignore this or to realize it and to not stand up for what is right, we will certainly face ourselves (not god) and the hell we will realize will be in that unavoidable view of who we are and the destruction and suffering we had a hand in. the answer is to wake up and take responsibility for who we are, not push it off on a book that greed mongers re-wrote to make you into a fearful slave.
Relativism
There is such a thing as good and evil in this world. Everything is not relative. If if were that way then there would be no boundaries for what we could do. If someone killed your mom then told you "Well, it was good for my family to have your mom out of the picture", would it be "ok"?
Porn does hurt families. It causes your brain chemistry to change over time, and destroys your ability to have healthy, deep relationships with others.
And yes, things that give you pleasure can be a sin. What if someone gets great pleasure from killing other people? Is it rubbish to say that is "wrong"?
When you watch porn, what are you getting out of it other than pleasure? It's a dead-end that hurts more than it helps.
Porn Addiction
You say that porn changes the brain over time. I was 21 when I saw my first porn movie. I didn't understand what happened, but I felt a rush of good stuff pouring out of my brain. It was mesmerizing and felt great. It was an incredible rush. It was also the worst mistake of my life.
What is your life worth
Hv u ever imagine the day you'll die. Can u imagine your sister forced to hv sex, and you sit down just to watch them hv sex with her. Are u so wicked to let your fellow friend suffer in making d wrong choice. In life there is good and bad so dont be deceived. Without good or bad u can't get your grades in school. Pls think well, for life is very short.
Save up your treasures in Heavenly places
I hope your Firm Loosens Much brother in our Reality, Or your own soul will be Lost