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Lonely Madness: The Effects of Solitary Confinement and Social Isolation on Mental and Emotional Health
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Biology 202, Spring 2005
Third Web Papers
On Serendip
Lonely Madness: The Effects of Solitary Confinement and Social Isolation on Mental and Emotional Health
Carly Frintner
By Carly Frintner
Paper #3 for Neurobiology and Behavior, Spring 2005
Professor Paul Grobstein
I began to research the effects of solitary confinement on prisoners' behavior while thinking about the ways in which we isolate ourselves from others, or are isolated by others in our daily lives. I cherish and am very protective of my own chosen moments of solitude, but I also know that long periods of time alone can send me into a depressive state, or make me feel like I'm going crazy. More specifically, a kind of panic sets in when I realize I'm alone with my thoughts with no one to affirm or deny the validity of what I'm thinking. When I'm by myself for too long, I start to question my own understanding of reality—of who I really am and what the world is really like. I need interactions with other people because they are such a significant part of how I understand and enjoy my life and my reason for living. All people seem to depend on varying amounts and intensities of social interaction to keep them happy, stable, and sane. This is not surprising given that human beings are social animals by nature.
Human beings are also naturally curious. Drastically reducing the amount of "normal social interaction, of reasonable mental stimulus, of exposure to the natural world, of almost everything that makes life human and bearable, is emotionally, physically, and psychologically destructive" (2) because it denies us the ability to ask questions and seek reasons and information to form explanations that allow us to understand ourselves as well as our world and our place and purpose in the world. It is logical that we feel less stable and secure overall when the things that our brain and body rely on to connect to and understand our surroundings are taken away from us.
In class, we have occasionally discussed how we check in with other people to get an understanding of ourselves. In one extreme example, we recalled a final scene of the movie "A Beautiful Mind" in which Professor John Nash asked a student to verify that there was a man standing there talking to him. Because Nash's schizophrenia often caused him to hallucinate, he relied on other people to assure him what he was seeing was not just his own reality, but the reality of the world (including other people). We all do this to a certain degree, though probably to check much less subtle information than whether a person is or is not actually a hallucination.
Out of the more than 20,000 prisoners in the United States, about 2% are currently living in "super maximum security ("supermax") facilities or units. Prisoners in these facilities typically spend their waking and sleeping hours locked in small, sometimes windowless, cells sealed with solid steel doors. A few times a week they are let out for showers and solitary exercise in a small, enclosed space. Supermax prisoners have almost no access to educational or recreational activities or other sources of mental stimulation and are usually handcuffed, shackled and escorted by two or three correctional officers every time they leave their cells. Assignment to supermax housing is usually for an indefinite period that may continue for years." (2)
I have sometimes gone for hours and even days with very minimal human contact. As a result, I experienced anxiety, depression, and a feeling of being disconnected from the world around me, even though I had complete freedom to go wherever I wanted. Prisoners who are isolated for prolonged periods of time have been known to experience "depression, despair, anxiety, rage, claustrophobia, hallucinations, problems with impulse control, and/or an impaired ability to think, concentrate, or remember." (2) Studies have also shown that isolation can cause "impaired vision and hearing... tinnitus [(ringing in the ears)], weakening of the immune system, amenorrhea [(absence of menstrual periods in women)], premature menopause... and aggressive behavior in prisoners, volunteers and animals." (1)
Previously healthy prisoners have "develop[ed] clinical symptoms usually associated with psychosis or severe affective disorders" (2) including "all types of psychiatric morbidity." (4) Many have committed suicide.
Individuals do vary in how well they can deal with living in isolation, however. (4) For prisoners with pre-existing mental or emotional disorders, living without normal human interaction, physical and mental activity and stimulation can aggravate their symptoms to levels equivalent to torture. (2), (3) In one complaint filed against the Connecticut Department of Correction in August 2003, social isolation and sensory deprivation drove some prisoners to "lash out by swallowing razors, smashing their heads into walls or cutting their flesh." (3)
It is difficult if not impossible to pinpoint the exact reasons why social isolation and sensory deprivation in solitary confinement situations causes mental and emotional breakdown in prisoners. However, in addition to the stimuli and interactions they are denied, we might also consider how people's minds are affected by others controlling every aspect of their lives, from where they are and how long they will be there to how much food they get and when, to light and noise levels, to what possessions they are allowed to have, to when or if their clothes, bedding and rooms are cleaned, to when and if they get to have fresh air.
How does the absolute denial of freedom, the denial of any kind of personal power or influence over one's life, affect the way he thinks, feels and acts? Certainly the impact is different for each person. But are there patterns across cultures and time in how slaves, prisoners, people living under a dictator, and children grounded by their parents react similarly to the denial of freedom? Are the patterns in reactions solely human, or do they extend to other animals, for instance, animals that are caged or otherwise restricted in pet stores, zoos or circuses? Do all animals, including human beings, feel and understand injustice on some level and therefore react to it similarly? Or are humans reduced to more stereotypically animalistic behavior when they are trapped and controlled? "In some states, the conditions are so extreme-e.g., lack of windows, denial of reading material, a maximum of three hours a week out-of-cell time, lack of outdoor recreation-that they can only be explained as reflecting an unwillingness to acknowledge the inmates' basic humanity." (2) Can people retain their humanity without the constant affirmation of their humanity through positive contact with other human beings? How do human beings' behaviors and thought processes shift when the human beings around them refuse to accept their shared humanity?
I am thinking more about the brain's needs based on my research on this particular topic. The physical, mental and emotional effects of living in solitary confinement seem to be beyond the control of the person experiencing them. It seems that the brain needs a certain quantity, quality, or type of stimuli to help regulate, direct and prioritize thought processes and other brain functions properly. It could mean that without certain (or enough) stimuli, the level of random activity in the nervous system increases—such as brain activity that causes hallucinations.
When inputs are all coming from the same place, parts of the unconscious experience the same inputted information differently because they are all interpreting the information with different randomness. The randomness helps us make connections between sets of inputted information and our own prior knowledge to ultimately create a story that explains our situation and surroundings. This story informs the "I"-function, which allows us to experience and understand the situation/surroundings personally. (5)
In an environment with very minimal stimulation, such as a prison cell, the randomness with which the unconscious explores the environment continues, although it is unclear whether randomization increases when fewer stimuli are reaching the brain. Perhaps the brain attempts to compensate for stimuli it is missing by creating stimuli of its own, that is, by increasing random activity. Either way, when the brain is not receiving much input from the environment, there is little information based in reality that the unconscious can focus on or try to interpret. The story reported back to the "I"-function is more likely informed by more random connections than real facts about reality because reality is not offering enough stimuli to make a coherent story. This helps explain why people often experience mental and emotional breakdowns and psychotic episodes when in solitary confinement for extended periods of time.
References
1)F-Type Isolation Prisons in Turkey
2)Supermax Prisons: An Overview
3)Lawsuits Attack Isolated Prison Conditions for Mentally Ill , Mental Health Law Weekly; Prison Health. April 2, 2005.
4)Isolation and Mental Health, NHS National Electronic Library for Health.
5) The Brain's Images: Co-Constructing Reality and Self , Paul Grobstein. May 2002. (And conversation May 2005.)
6) Isolation, Breakdowns and Mysterious Injections. , Vikram Dodd, Richard Norton-Taylor and Rosie Cowan. January 26, 2005. From The Guardian (UK), via Common Dreams News Center.
7) Mental Issues in Long-Term Solitary and "Supermax" Confinement., Craig Haney.
Comments made prior to 2007
If mankind can be identified as a social animal, it seems absolute that involuntary social isolation from whatever source can be deemed cruel and unusual punishment, whether in a home under a parent, spouse, in a work environment with overly regimented rules that ignore human needs, or in institutional settings where what is seen, heard, felt, etc. is all controlled by someone else. To be sure, it isn't autonomy, and one would expect that adverse physiological and mental effects would be the outcome of that environment. Consider for example, the isolation of girls or boys in trafficking or prostitution where they are not allowed out at all.
Much different from self imposed isolation, but perhaps not free from ill effects; consider the Howard Hughes case where fear prevented him from social engagement.
In theory, the principle of R&R for the military is to reduce the high intensity concentration of rigid over-regimentation that is required in wars, and therefore, requires some consideration of the human features of physical and mental requirements of humans.
Humans are universal in these needs, but humanity sometimes doesn't recognize these basics, and act accordingly, or permit ourselves the humanity to insure that this facility is respected, and acknowledged in order to make that possible.
To the best extent of our capability, the concept of being human is rarely discussed, planned for, etc., and quite often, humans are left to their own devices without sufficient liberty insurance to help themselves. What is inhumane or not is not a matter of perspective but what is universally recognized as necessary, as it would be for any other primate, or animal.
To suggest that community health is a community affair would not be wrong in that case, and it applies regardless of circumstances. Humans, like all other animals have needs, and perhaps, as much, if not more than other animals ... Pat, 10 May 2007
Comments
My Personal Hell
I have been in social isolation for most of my waking life. I find no comfort whatsoever day after day. I have tried killing myself a multitude of times but always fail because I have broken down my mental and cognitive functioning so much. I beg for people to get out and experience life because it is not possible for me anymore. I sit at home thinking the same negative thoughts over and over again and simply being lost in my own lonely world day after day. I have reached the point of no return and have nobody to turn to. I am souless I have concluded. Why this is I do not know. I just hope that God has answers when I am gone. Is hell where I will reside? I believe Im already there. Just without the fire.
God loves you. Whosoever
God loves you. Whosoever calls upon the name of the Lord Jesus shall be saved. Open a Bible and read it. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Pray that He and you enter into deep relationship. Find a real church not a den of fakes. Jesus said all men shall know you are my disciples by your love one for another.
BS
BS
Isolation
Hi.
I'm in the same situation as you. I have been in isolation for the past 9 years. I would like to chat to you about your experience and your thoughts about this condition.
Thank you.
u want to connect with others
i'd like to talk with you but how do we do that? get contact info? i've been in "solitary" for most of 17 years.
Excuse my rambling - habit formed in isolation - love to you all
There is a book called "With God in Solitary Confinement" by Richard Wurmbrand.
I haven't read it. I've read another book by him, however, and loved it. There are no doubts in my mind that that would be incredibly helpful for someone in your position.
And I'm in a very similar position. The only difference is I have, in a way, embraced this hell -- after years of being unable to explain any of my thoughts to people, and progressively spiraling down and down into deeper and deeper isolation, and suffering all sorts of things that only I know about...in a way, it's peaceful. How?
I think this thought: "If God weren't thinking of me, I wouldn't exist." I may be exhausted, stressed out, upset or uncontrollably emotional or roller-coastering all over the place...but when I think that thought, it leads me into some central foundation of peace. I don't know how. The Grace of God?
I've never had a girlfriend. I always wanted one. I always wanted affection. For years I basically did nothing but have mood swings all day, go in and out of morbid depression and mania, get hospitalized, go to therapy programs, and end up in the same place over and over again.
And yet now, after feeling like I've lost everything and been completely broken down -- my ability to think clearly has plummeted, and I can't even process thoughts in silence anymore -- I'm starting to feel more peaceful. I'm still in a lot of pain. That hasn't gone away. But the peace more than makes up for it.
I really do believe God is with me. If I wasn't in his thoughts, I wouldn't exist. The same goes for you, and everyone else here.
You tell people to get out and experience life; I think that is great advice. I will likewise tell you to experience your life for everything it has to offer; all the pain, all the suffering, all the hell you've been living in and are living in right now. I can only speak for myself, but the richness that that suffering and the uniqueness of my difficulties gives me a great sense of depth to this life. I have suicidal ideation all the time, but even with that, I'm grateful to have this opportunity to be alive.
And who said a better world will never come? I think it will. We suffer hell now in order to see everything that's wrong with this world; and we can help to make it better. Maybe in some odd thousand years, there will be a better place. Maybe there will be heaven. Never lose hope. I haven't even experienced any affection with a girl before. I doubt I ever will. But even if I die like this, who's to say that's the end?
I can't take anyone's pain away. I can't take mine away. But there's more to life -- and to anyone suffering these things...I would like to say to you, embrace everything you have and all you've been given in your life. Don't focus on the pain as the pain, but as a signal that there are so many beautiful things in life, and a depth to life that we can't even begin to fathom. Suffering is never in vain. You wouldn't exist if God wasn't thinking of you.
Some people have a wife or a husband or a great friend or family to confide in and feel understood. I have the Internet and the opportunity to put things out there, and, after never thinking about them again, hoping that someone will read these words and either find solace in them or simply feel the richness of a human connection. Everyone writing here is alive -- no one here is just words on a page.
There are beautiful things in life. Seeing them by yourself, or only in your imagination, or in silence, or solitude, or complete disconnect from all apparent human warmth and sympathy....this is very painful, but in a way, it makes it all the more beautiful. Maybe one of the opportunities that this isolation offers...is to know better than most people how deeply we're loved -- on an intrinsic level, by this universe we're alive in.
Asking "Do you love me?" in isolation is a very powerful thing. No one else's thoughts or opinions or affections can reach you; only God can. Or 'the universe.' Or whatever you want to call 'it.'
See why I type so much? My brain never stops. That can be torture. But even with racing thoughts, that beauty can still be contemplated -- "all stability of character rests on contemplation of changeless unity." If God wasn't thinking of you, you wouldn't exist.
I can only hope that my rambling here won't offend anyone, or make anyone think I'm a fool. I hope that people's understanding of what stress isolation can induce on the mind...it makes thinking hard. So I type a lot.
If God wasn't thinking of me, I wouldn't exist. I just come back to that, and suddenly everything is okay. Still painful, but okay.
Love and good luck to everyone. And to anyone thinking of committing suicide: your life has more value than you know. Doing a 'mental flatline' helps when you have those urges too -- don't think "I want to kill myself," but simply feel the mental pain as if it were completely physical, like you have a horrible stomach ache or anything like that -- you don't think "I'm in pain," you just feel the pain, and let it run its course. Mentally processing the idea of suicide is usually what seems to push people over the edge into actually doing it; if you shut your brain's processing off and either cry or roll around on the floor or feel it as physical pain...I find that I've lasted until I fell asleep, and then when I woke up, I felt much better than the night before.
Isolation is so strongly emotionally and socially based, but when you're in a really difficult situation, you need all the help you can get: don't forget food. Making homemade sourdough has helped me with my cognitive abilities, as well as the many nutritional advantages of making it the *real* way...I also plan on making homemade kefir regularly soon as well. I eat canned beans and tomato paste and sardines and canned salmon and fresh fruits and vegetables, though they're more expensive. Sourdough and kefir are healthy and seem to be good options for people with cognitive disabilities who both can't afford more expensive healthy foods and could use more cognitive development -- sourdough and kefir are like pets -- you need to feed them regularly -- and that is very good exercise for a debilitated brain, when doing something as basic as taking a shower is stressful.
I hope better nutrition will get into prison systems, as well as the global population in general. The world needs more love in so many ways.
Thank you all for sharing all you have to say. This company for today has made me feel much happier :D We are with each other in spirit.
hello
Hello, my apologies for a random email, but just wanted to say how much I enjoyed your posting.
It's late and I have work tomorrow and a fiance I am keeping up by click-clicking on my laptop - but I was researching isolation as part of some research (nothing very intellectual though!) and stumbled upon this topic and read through all the postings attached to it. Yours is very touching.
I hope you are okay, and non-corporeal love to you (and all). I don't know whether that will assist you or not, but you have my thoughts when you need them! I understand some of what you describe and can only offer what little I have - I wish you peace and happiness in your search; thank you for posting with so much integrity - you shine through :)
Been isolating myself for 2 years
I've been isolating myself more and more for 2 years now, up until a point where all I do is wake up late, sit on the computer, play video games, watch movies, read or sleep. I have more or less 0 social contact.
And I don't know why I keep doing it to myself. It feels like my mind is going crazy, I'm losing context and the only things that come up in my mind are the last things I did in the "real world".
It's real torment though, the feeling is unexplainable, it's like bashing your head against a wall and not stopping. But it doesn't stop with you dying, you just keep feeling number and number...I've had moments where I fell at peace with it, however, I don't know if that's real peace.
My memory has gone weaker, I can't remember faces any more, things are fading away...and the only thing I have is this internet contact, it makes me feel a little better...but it's not real, it's like writing a diary...not like being with real people.
Fantastic
Jib's advice about feeling pain, rather than thinking about it, is tremendous. There's a Buddhist saying I remember: "Pushing the cart is easy; it's thinking about pushing the cart that's hard." If you physically embrace the feelings of suicide without analyzing, it makes it easier.
I appreciate a lot of the comments here. I've always felt very different from other people on the inside. I way that I think is different, the way I have feelings is different, my values. I believe that this world is not my home, that I dont belong here. One of my fantasies is one day to get permission from my mother to kill myself, and then leave this shithole...but with a clean conscience :)
I've been lucky so far with getting through things one day at a time. In several years i'll have enough money to comfortably go into retreat. I just have to find a nice cave somewhere and bring a few tons of food, and then i'll be alone and devote myself to spiritual practice. Maybe there I'll find something worthwhile. The world of men is not a just place, but I do have some kind of faith in the world to come. There are a few people that do exist out there who have real integrity. They are one in one-thousand and two in ten-thousand, but do they exist.
To anyone with deep pain, my email is . I'm different from other people, so there's a chance I can relate. And I'd like to help.
If you've fallen apart (preferably in north america :P), I'll get in my car some weekend and come pick you up, and you can stay with me.
Broken People
touching - nice offer to share your space / time
peace and love to you Zak
If you are in UK - call in ;)
Holy Cow Yes
Hi, Jib: You did a swell job of presenting the face of extreme solitude to the readers. Dare I say that you had advantages earlier in life? Your grammar and thought processes seem particularly intact, thus you come across as a believable expert. I like the way you incorporate both sides of the life issues; and, the inclusion of dietary information is particularly valuable. Your insight into the greater good of all is exceptional. In short, Great Job! Best wishes from a fellow visitor with confinement issues similar to each of the comment contributors.
peace
have you tried prayer?
Isolation is good for me now
For me I spent years, actually the best part of two decades slowly going more and more crazy from various experiences, failures, drug taking and the occasional beating.
I was a friendly person in my teens, I had some close friends who have all gone long ago, and sometimes I still find myself missing them a lot.
I was not widely popular with people which was fine by me, as I was a bit introverted and incredibly self conscious of myself in every possible.
Funnily enough I was the opposite as a kid, very extroverted in some ways and very loud and annoying, and not shy at all.
But as I went through pubescence something else changed in me, a gradual dawning that I was not like every one else, that there were few other people much like me, that the non acceptance of me by most people was going to be a permanent state of reality, not something that would change for the better.
Although I am of above average intelligence, because of my poor social skills, most people including my own family think I'm a complete fool, loser, stupid, weird, not good at anything, useless.
However I dont really agree with Societys or my familys assesment of me, I have done alot of wrong things in my life, some of which I have blanked out as it was driving me too far into depression.
I learnt how to do this about ten years ago, when things were at there blackest.
I have also done some good things in my life too, I dont think Im a terrible person, just a sad lonley one that cant make the jump now to communicate properly with other people.
I can now again talk politely to them, and any rejection is shrugged off mostly easily.
I dont bear people any bad will now for the things they have done to me in the past, but I do reject my family now, as there seems to be no real friendship there, and if something isnt there, its not real, so dont try to make it into something its not.
I prefer to keep it real with them now, because I don't have much other choice.
You cant create love out of nothing at all, despite what air supply say.
I'm now happy to keep to myself, but I know its good and healthy for you to keep up a friendly front for the public, its in the loners best interest to appear as normal as possible, to keep away from other people but not to to anything strange either, just do what the other humans do.
I no longer trust the mental health department in NSW, from my experiences with it, its basically just an uncaring industry, more interested in the merits of what socialism can gain for them, in not having to do the least amount of hard work, to not be in any danger despite their job, to go to endless meetings about ways to improve the mental health system of NS, but not actually do anything, its talk, talk, nod head alot at each other wisely etc lets now go have a coffee and a smoke.
Also one that fronts for the large pharmaceutical company's, and not much else.
Some positive stuff has come out of it lately for the homeless of inner Sydney, but you have to be very lucky to get such help.
I'm now happy being in solitude, five years ago I completely broke away from my loneliness, the hurt is now mostly gone, I can deal with rejection easily, because I simply do not care much anymore about getting rejected.
I am happy doing yoga at my gym, the occasional weights session, nothing too crazy, and 2 5 km runs through the city's parks twice a week.
I plan to go in the city to surf 14 km run later this year, something I have wanted to do for nearly 20 years, and this year I am doing it, it matters not how long it takes me, or how many people beat me, just as long as I do it.
I have also always been a fairly decent drawer, I have failed at a lot of things in life, at least I can count continued failure as some kind of success I guess, but my drawing skill is the one thing I still have from when I was a kid, that is now with a lot of practice in the last few years finally starting to kick off.
After an absence of about 15 years, I started drawing again ten tears ago when I was 30, and with continued attempts I finally stoked it back into life about three years ago, and now I am drawing every day again, like when I was a kid.
I usually draw just peoples faces, and I am going to classes sometimes to learn more technique, how to use materials etc life drawing classes especially are good.
I busk a bout twice a week at Chinatown usually at night drawing people for money, this can be sometimes be a bit hard for me as they usually want a portrait and the close human contact can be a bit overwhelming at times, but I am getting slowly better at handling it.
So I am happy now being a loner, having solitude etc if Im not meant to be with anyone then so be it, just enjoy what life gives you, I am not in a jail, I am not in a war, I am not a cripple.
I am healthy, I don't smoke, quit cold turkey 8 years ago, I don't play pokies, quit them for good 6 years ago, I don't drink alcohol, quit that 3 years ago, I don't smoke pot or do any other recreational drugs, quit that also 3 years ago.
I now focus on my art, my health, following my sports teams, going to cafes to read the news, and chatting to people on the net, this is good enough for me, I don't need much else, and despite being surrounded by millions of people in this city, I am completely alone.
Much enjoyed your post. It
Much enjoyed your post. It sounds to me like one of the better ways to lead a sane and wise life.
Thanks, I have picked up more
Thanks, I have picked up more positive look on life since then, I have passed a Cert IV in animation and special effects at TAFE, and I now own a flat a few blocks from me, that I am renting out to pay off the loan.
Your life is similar to mine,
Your life is similar to mine, except I'm 20. I find that I am happier alone than being around other people for too long. I guess some people are just more introverted.
Social Isolation - Lonley Madness
I found the article really entlightening and useful.
My demographic is "divorced" dad. My kids are with me some of the time and rest of the time I'm alone.
My disposal income after tax, child support and rent is really small. I have enough petrol to get to work atm and thats about it.
My immediate family members reside a long way away. For whatever reason I have less friends I can call on now than in the past.
Anyway, long story short .... at night times, I feel incredibly alone and isolated. I will go for days and the only ppl that occasionally call are telemarketers.
I have found the internet can be a window to the world, it led me to this article. Thankyou. The points raised therein, about the brain generating spurious thought processes in the absence of external ones really rang true.
In other words, unless you work at it, it has the potential to send you mad. Anyway thankyou for the article, it is useful and interesting.
Isolated Thoughts
i find myself retreating into isolation almost every year, each time longer than the last. For me it allows me to think clearly and critically about society and myself. I get very frustrated and bored with making small talk with others. I find most conversations simply a product of mass media brainwashing, heavily coated in polite conversation etiquette.
the social encounters that i do enjoy are often spontaneous, with strangers whom i will most likely never meet again. I find there is a lot more to living than spending your time talking about the same shit with the same people week after week. there's so much to learn from taking in another persons point of view with an open mind.
I think people who stay in isolation are simply stigmatized by mainstream psychology. when in fact most hermits are causing less harm than the rest of society. my experiences out in the world is that everyone is pushing to make themselves into "something" whether they like to admit it or not. mostly because of greed and envy. were programmed to never be satisfied!
I simply stay out of it because i can see whats going on in mainstream society and it is more upsetting to me than it is to sit at home alone and read a book.
Call it depression, bipolar, pessimistic or however the textbooks will define it. I call it realistic and contempt
I'ts not genuine
Yes, ive come to the point where i HATE that the clerks first ask me "how are you" rather then "how may i hlep you" and then "have a nice day. In nearly 100% of the intereactions whether it's walmart, grocery store, phone company or coffee shop, the clerk messes up the interaction (wrong change that sort of thing) and then feels that if they ask how are you and have a nice day, it makes up for their gross in competence.
when i am asked how are you and i feel they are only asking it because they are paid to, i igore them and don't answer. i just say "i prefer plastic please" or that sort of thing.
very occasionally i thing the clerk is genuine and i'll answer" i'm here" and if i'm truly interested i'll say "and u?"
i HATE small talk. the 2 apt communities i've lived in in the past 5 years nobody ever says anyting to me but "sure is hot out"
when out the only thing anyone says is"like your shirt"
i resent what has become of the society but at the same time i crave friendships where i can truly be myself
Genuine?
Employees at every level (store cashiers, waiters, toll booth workers, pharmacists, receptionists etc etc) really are "people too".
By this I mean, they go to work day after day, ringing up your purchases and being treated as if they were nameless, faceless automatons. These same employees have names. They have likes and dislikes. They have problems and joys. They have stresses. They might have a great sense of humor.
Please take the time to notice their name (duh it's on their badge usually) and address them by their name. Comment with empathy if you see they are extra busy, tell them thanks and "see you next time". You probably see the same employees over and over, maybe weekly (grocery store) or monthly (hair salon).
They work hard for very little money and are treated as invisible by most customers>
While they may not be genuine since their employer REQUIRES them to say those things, be a little spontaneous and start a conversation about the weather or something, chit chat. Small talk. Pretty soon those anonymous cashiers or wait staff become almost like a friend to you.
Sometimes you have to reach out. Isolation is the topic of this page, and as we see from the posts that isolation is common and painful. Consider how a small action or a few words on your part might brighten someone's day who is also suffering a form of isolation.
If you want to be remembered, show kindness, go back down the aisle and buy a bottle of tylenol to the cashier who has a headache. Bring a dozen donuts for the office staff at your doctor's office.
Reaching out is tough at first but the rewards are enormous.
Isolation Can Offer Ultimate Peace of Mind
In February of 2004 I was working for a large multi-national corporation. It was a wonderful opporunity to "travel the world without ever leaving" because this company embraced diversity and celebrated the differences. I had the opportunity to work with, and get to know people of all ages and all educational levels from all over the world. I had the whole planet in front of me, and it was a wonderful experience. My best friend was from Iran, my girlfriend was from India, my boss was a female rednecked bitch hillbilly from Kentucky, my major nemasis was a Vietnamese refugee/war veteran with a pathological chip on his shoulder, my minor nemasis who had a Napolean Complex was the son of a Mexican illegal immigrant, my secret desire was for a beautiful raven haired goddess from Central America. I worked there for over a decade, and here is THE RUB!!...I finally understood that I really could not stand to be around any of them anymore!! So I quit in February of 2004. Ever since then until this current day, I have been living in Self-Imposed Solitary Confinement...for almost six years. I have no family, no friends, no wife, no girlfriend, no children, no pets, no plants, and I have convinced my neighbors to stay away from me. My isolation is total and complete...and everlasting.
What I learned from that last job, just validated my personal philosophy and spiritual beliefs. I had the whole world at my doorstep to interact with, and it just verified what I had suspected, for so long... that the human race and its silly DRAMA...is just too sad to deal with. Every human, from every corner of the earth, because they are Human...they are tied up with the Biblical Struggle...the Drama. All of them!!?? How sad. The Human Drama is always...a Tragedy!!
My beliefs are eclectic; I have studied all the general "beliefs", and have developed my own combination that is mostly...Daoism / The Tao. I am finally a happy hermit. My house is in a typical suburban neighborhood. But in my mind, my home is nothing less than a true Sanctuary from all the madness that goes on outside my door. In my mind...my home is like a cave high up on a mountain side. I leave once a week to go to the grocery store, and that one trip might or might not involve a short sentence or two of conversation with the cashier. That has been the extent of my human interaction, for the past six years, and that's the truth.
I cant say I am really "happy". I would not want to. I would not say I am sad. I am balanced now...between the two. My meditations have cleansed me from the maddening throng outside, and from their sad human drama, that sends them on that rollercoaster of ups and downs.
Unfortunately...I am almost out of my savings now. And I am going to have to go back into the world again soon to replenish my money. This is not something I look forward to. But...I am so much more prepared now to deal with all the sad insanity out there...now!! I have found my balance. And I know my purpose...simply to get enough money so that I can come back to my quiet peaceful cave, back to my self-imposed isolation and hermitage.
Isolation is not always a bad thing, especially for those, like me, who have come to the widsom that the World is nothing more than a crazy daily confrontation. Humans are perhaps the worst animals of God's Creation. I truly do not believe that we were made in his image. I have too much love and respect for our God, to believe this.
Peace...I pray, for all of us
solitary confinement's effects on the previously mentally ill
I did twice did time in CT state prisons both times on the mental health unit.
Admittedly, I was violent and anti-authority... after facing off against a correctional officer, I was sent to segregation.
This was my 3rd or 4th time in 'seg' but turned out to be the longest.
I was held in a cell with only a small window by myself for 43 consecutive days. I was allowed to leave the cell only for showers on M-W-F.
The reason for the length of my stay was that they were debating whether or not to keep my level the same and send me to the chronic discipline unit or to lower my level and integrate me with the general population.
They opted for the latter but I was already starting to experience psychosis due to sensory deprivation.
I did not adjust well in general population and was again sent to segregation.
The next 3-4 months were spent in acute paranoid schizophrenia. I was shuffled back and forth between the prison hospital and 'seg'. The prison hospital was worse as I was not allowed anything that I could fashion into a weapon to harm myself or others.
No pens or pencils, no comb, no toothbrush, no razor... no clothing besides a Ferguson gown.
I began to believe that my medication was poison and they started a procedure of forced medication.
They would enter my cell, spray my in the face with pepper spray, knock me to the floor with riot shields and hold me down while a nurse injected me with haldol and benadryl.
I was released from prison but not allowed to return home. I spent an additional 10 months in the state's maximum security psychiatric facility where I slowly came around due to aggressive medication and increased socialization.
I have been free of psychotic symptoms since 2003 now. I am employed and living on my own.
I am doing well now but will never forget the months I spent in segregation or isolation.
be free of your pain
So sorry to hear about your experiences, you sound a bit like me, I used to fight everything, but as I got older and wiser finally, I realised I was just trying to prove myself over and over again, when I didn't even have too, my anger was too big for me, it overwhelmed me, and became my constant companion a wolf walking besides me, that I was no longer aware of, for me it became just the normal way to feel.
And people could see and feel it as soon as I walked into a room, and then they would react to it, which had me wondering after while, why does the whole world want to fight me?
I finally got back to a more stable outlook over the years, after some bad experiences, as I regained my sense of humour, and never underestimate the power of genuine laughter, it is like a tonic that completely destresses your body and cleans out all the bad feelings and hurt from it, every time you genuinely smile or laugh, you heal yourself a little bit.
I learned sometimes that you just have to bend like a reed with people despite how much you dislike them for some reason, or you will get broken, your only one man, and its not superman as much as we would wish, a loner has to use his wits to stay alive and happy as long as possible.
Be a loner, but be social too, as in get out and do stuff that wont get you in any trouble, nothing you find shameful, do it for yourself, enjoy life, if you cant have people in it, then just enjoy the world and any activity's you can do, be free for as long as you like.
Heaven awaits us and will accept what the world rejects.
lock down for 4 years :(
I know how most of you feel.Ive been studying programming for 4 years through correspondance.I only live with my father in a very small house in a rural area.I have almost no contact with anyone exept my father.Its extremely hard and everyday you follow the same pattern.I read above that crazy dawg plays games.I do exackly same play online games(Quake 3 specifically).I have extreme obsessive behaviours.Thinking about the same things over and over again.Its so true that you feel like you going mad.I had young guy over here try to make friends with me but i just cant communicate with him.I find that i cannot tolerate
him.The smallest thing he does drives me insane.This goes for every 1 infact.I cant stand in lines with out being so self concious.I have extreme paranioa.I constantly think why am i here.What can i do and try to find things to keep myself busy.I have so much time on my hands so i analyse everything around me,Stupid things i analyse like am i washing my clothes correctly and how can i improve my washing skills,then i start to read programming books and analyse everything in those books thinking about them for hours and hours this goes for games.I find the solution to the problem but just isnt good enough and its a cycle i start all over again.I think to myself i need to get a job
and start working so i can interact with people but im so afraid i wont get employed so i study and study.Sometimes i sit in my room and think hey the world is just passing me by.Just yesturday it feels like my very old friends wife was pregnant now the child is 6 and im like wow.What have i been doing all this time.the only thing i can say is ive been studying.I find it extremely hard to make small talk with people because i dont do anything exept sit infront of the PC for hours and hours.I have nothing in common with other people.What do i do bring up my programming ideas, these people will look at me and say WHat is this what you call small talk.I find that when i do try to communicate with friends and family on facebook they all seem to ignore me as if i dont exists and they are all cought up in there hussle and bussle lives.It does hurt being very lonely hurts more than somebody sticking a knife into you.You do loose all emotion from isolation as you get caught up in your own thoughts and forget about everything around you.Nothing else matters exept trying to find the solutions to those questions goin round and round in your head.I see a pattern already as my text is goin in circles.I have nothing else to say out of ideas.
Agree
I absolutely identify with the description in the post from Sat, 06/20/2009 - 7:23pm.
The details are nicely presented. I am in the same situation. It has been approximately 20 years for me. I live in a suburban area.
It is torture.
There is no point in explaining why a person such as you and I choose not to quit and leave. The tether to the perceived "jailer" is as mighty as it is short.
There's a "personal keeper" somewhere in an isolated person's life. By the time a non-criminally incarcerated person realizes it, there is little remaining of the person who existed before isolation crept up and took over.
It would be impossible to socialize a way out of isolation, and into a new situation. Other people would recognize weaknesses and prey upon them. In short, a person would be pummeled for being different without apparent reason.
It is a test of endurance, resourcefulness, and time. The value of our contribution to our immediate surroundings is worth more than our value outside. Nobody has to tell us that; it's supremely evident through the second brain -- the gut. A fly on the wall would say the same thing.
Each tiny reason for isolation can be reasoned away. The sum of tiny reasons cannot be dismissed without undesirable consequences to the individuals within the surroundings of isolation.
My Isolation
I found this article to be well written and it did touch on the surface on some of the consequences I have experienced in my isolation. I will start my story by saying that I am a 20 year old male who is just finishing up a 2 year AA in the liberal arts. I was always a little smarter than the rest of my peers and therefore I was distanced. I did not try to pursue academics, I instead turned to drugs, and I'll admit I still love them(I am only drinking with the occasional herb smoking these days).
The last couple of semesters, I have been slowly reverting to a state of self imposed isolation. I sit at home instead of going out into environments that I find to be boring or a nuisance. My girlfriend of over a year lived with me, and when she left I at first was unaware of the effects of my own choices. I did not make many new friends, and shortly after we started to get along again and for awhile I was partying with all of my old acquaintances.
Fast forward to 6 months later, where I am on probation and have lost my license and totaled my car. I'm not as worried about those things as I used to be, but you have to understand that I have nothing to offer to anyone I know. All of my old friends are drug users.. and the ones I do still talk to do not seem to understand where I am coming from. I think this could be translated universally to anyone who is thrown out of their element.
It gets worse as time passes, I have been experiencing brain fog possibly due to my isolation and I am much worse at making small talk. My last semester of school ended, and for about 3 weeks I have been sitting at home on the computer everyday with no job. My interactions are limited to the two people I live with and my friend Justin. Also family and some going out for drinking. It is not as bad as perhaps some have, but it is definitely taking a toll that I believe will be on my tab for a long time to come. I have taken my philosophy of apathy and existentialism to a new level.
When you examine what life means.. you find that to exercise clarity you can only breathe and survive. I am doing this, but the lack of fresh and diverse stimuli is a little BORING. I wish all the best of luck, especially in the United States of America where as one man said previously capitalism and the greed that comes with profit will fuck anyone. A man I once knew also said that Americans will never come together on any cause because there is too much money at stake.
If anyone would like to contact me, my e-mail address is down_smack@hotmail.com. I know that it is kind of a stupid address but I haven't gotten a new one yet, even though you would think I had the time. I have a wide base of knowledge and would be glad just to listen and even give feedback to anyone with the time on their hands. I really did like a lot of the comments that were posted here and I wish I had more time to think through my reply and write it gracefully. Good luck.
Bibamus, Moriendum est! (This means, to err is to human, so let us drink. Other translations or phrases amount to, we all must die, so let us drink. Cheers)
Most extreme isolation articles on the benefits are simply wrong
A short background on my Isolation
I enjoyed my early retirement at fifty and the standard white picket fence routine. The only daughter had moved out and the wife and I decided it was time to find that "last" home for the golden years. After moving from California to a forty acre ranch near Pyramid lake and the Paiute Indian reservation in Nevada, I had no idea of the unknown changes that would soon take place.
The brutal northern Nevada winters and the shear cabin fever boredom went on for a few years. One Monday morning after a few cups of coffee, "Enough" she said, Nevada had chased my dearly loved wife of thirty two years back to California for good. The crippling and devastating divorce stipulated that I could occupy the property for eight years or until both dogs died, whichever came first. No more dreams of the future, a major life event indeed had occurred.
All I now possessed was a small pension that paid the mortgage payment and a one man software company that paid the other bills. Because of our complacency we had no new or close friends. With no family, two close companion dogs, and a forty acre chuck of earth on the side of a mountain, what was a 55 year old single male going to do?
Well my reader friends, I'm here to tell you it worked out in ways that I could have never imagined. It was not an easy morphing process to work through and never should be attempted by choice. It's still a 36 mile drive to buy quart of milk and after 1,135 days and nights absolutely alone I'm nothing but smiles from ear to ear.
Extreme Isolation, your changed mental properties
Living on the edge of sanity!
You are no longer stabilized by the solid social external anchors. There are no more checks and balances that harness or validate your existence and personal foundation.
You often experience feelings that you might spin out of control into a possible state of complete loss of all realities, leaving you in an unknown state (a place you have no experience with). You fear the possibility of complete loss of all known self controls that stabilize you, perhaps leaving you as an uncontrollable blubbering blob of existence.
Mental strength and stamina!
I experience extreme emotional high and low swings. One learns and understands the self cycles. When and why they occur and how to deal and manipulate them for your benefit.
Avoiding the self torture!
It is easy to slip into the doom and gloom state of mind, and spin downward. But you develop routines that prevent your darker side becoming the commander. Constantly gauging your stability you become aware of the complacency triggers and watch for them. Fourteen days straight of no outside contact or communication is the longest I've experienced, but knew exactly how to reel myself back to my safety zone.
Strong Empathy!
The ability to feel and experience the simple emotions of most other living things including people, flora and fauna.
Telepathy and speech understanding without words!
Communication with living things, or to understand messages without speech.
Easily reading someone else thoughts and emotions.
Extremely exhilarating emotions!
Very strong emotional feelings from laugh-crys (happy crying), the shear joy of your simplicity. Ultimate major self satisfaction for personal achievements.
A relaxed attitude!
You still posses anger, anxieties and frustrations and the other emotional drama results. But they no longer cause you to be reactive. The absence of social stimuli and cultural chatter leaves you nothing to get excited about. There is no longer a need to multitask or "do it all now". In my case, often complete loss of date and time are the norm. I used no calendars for the fist few years, as the day of week was no longer important. A wrist watch did help with daily chore scheduling
Strong reliance on self!
When you no longer require anyone else, your world is a wonderful place to be. You become capable of doing just about anything within your own limits. Using your own diligence and curiosities as a motivating driver you become capable of doing things you never thought possible. You'll reset your goals higher as you develop an intolerance towards your self inadequacies. You learn to cope with your short comings and truly understand your own strengths and weaknesses, and live by them.
Lots of time in one's own head!
Ah yes, this benefit is included free of charge and goes with the territory. You have no choice but to spend much time in self thought. Constantly analyzing, validating, wondering, approving and dis-approving everything around you on a daily basis. Often you grow tired of this auto start brain processing feature, but your brain must stay busy. Unfortunately this mental chore usually can not be turned off.
Uncontrollable deep self discussions are the norm. I very often have internal dialect between three members of me. The creative person (Pro), the logic(Con) and a referee/coach that prevents decision stalemates. Question are usually silently asked of one or the another while the response answers are verbally spoken out loud. I am not sure why only the responses are spoken out loud.
Visions, real or not?
Some visions will become questionable as to their validity. This occurs randomly and is normal and often pleasantly entertaining and rewarding. Because the vision's contents may or may not actually exist, the vision is not processed nor important. You understand that your brain my be just working overtime in response to idle activity, fatigue or a number of other catalysts. Because of my location on the high desert and surrounding mountains I often see altered landscapes, local wildlife and objects in my immediate environment that do not actually exist, but accept these sightings without reservation.
Simple diets become the norm!
Your diet changes change over time to necessities and which foods are necessary becomes obvious.Weight loss and eating habits automatically become stable using only the nutrients you require. You learn exactly how your body reacts to various foods intakes. You understand what sugars, fats and desired harmful foods do to you, usually avoiding them. A treat now and then is often "my reward" for an accomplishment.
Increased "listening" to you own body's health!
The body tells you of it's well being, if you listen. The little aches and pains, a cold or flu all become very apparent when life becomes simple. You learn to react accordingly when necessary. You also learn of the precautions to take to insure positive physical health.
Sensitivities (all physical senses)!
You also hear and see much more of the universe surrounding you. Because of your new simplicity, the unnoticeable become clear. You can now easily see what was environmentally hidden before. The deafening silence now reveals much more than ever heard before. Your sense of smell increases dramatically. The simple whiffs of spring flowers become overwhelming waves of absolute olfactory excitement.
Deep understanding of what's important and what's not important.
This basic fundamental concept is an essential growth tool. It takes some learning and training in the beginning to re-program yourself, but becomes one of the greatest decision assets you will ever need.
We spend much of our life chasing what we believe to be important. In our cultural cluster we've been trained to follow the leader and do as our piers. You have learned to attain the social success as defined by the cluster, for the benefit of the cluster. These socially accepted "goals for fruitful life" have nothing whatsoever to do with the inner you, they are of little use in isolation. You will set new achievable goals that remain fluid and changeable.
Auto-Dump the useless emotions!
Fear, greed, lust, sympathy and other negative emotions have no use in isolation. They require another living being to be emotionally processed. Whereas love, empathy, respect, honesty and other positive emotions generated within self can be used by you, on you. In true self isolation you can not lie to yourself, lust for yourself or sympathize with yourself - it simply does not work.
Loss of self fears!
You lose most socially learned properganda fears, fear of death and after life, the boogie man etc.. You learn that self generated fear exists only between your own two ears, nowhere else. For the most part, fear is one of the useless emotions. Based on what is now important to you, fear has very few uses. It can produce a few beneficial precautions and useful preventative measures.
Understanding death, you are prepared to leave this planet on a daily bases, if needed. Life after death means nothing now, leaving little or no concern about the after life, you'll deal with it when needed. Relying on a better life after death is another useless belief.
I was raised as a Lutheran, but no longer believe. Using a blind faith guide for life is nothing more than grownup wishful thinking. You now deal with each and every facet of your existence, turning over your unresolved life issues to an imaginary faith based "God" is not needed nor does not work.
A deeper understanding!
A clear view of your immediate environment, the universe and how it all works together. Your brain is a processor that remains "on" even when sleeping. This is an automatic process as are the results. Mostly fueled by curiosity the brain works to understand everything in your secluded environment. Constantly reanalyzing the pieces of an isolated life's puzzle, perhaps trying to solve the mystery of life, who knows. Over time, all the pieces will make sense, the puzzle will be completed and you will come to the proper conclusion as to why you exist.
A few of the Isolation negative pitfalls.
You will frequently question your own validity and existence at a very deep level.
No one with whom you can confide.
No other being to share joy and sorrow life experiences with.
No confidants or sounding board support.
Extreme loneliness that will trigger self desirability issues.
Your lack of sympathy for most everything.
SBS
November 3rd 2008
Much more can be written and whether you agree or not with this writing is not important.
My graduate work has been
My graduate work has been driving me mad :(
I have been socially isolated for almost 2 years, with a little contact once a day with my wife and two children. About once every 2 weeks, I get an appointment with a supervisor, to discuss my work and its completion. I have become very apathetic and don't seem to care about anything anymore. I feel as if I have been dejected from my society/group and am being punished for being an individual. Is this some kind of tact from academia? or dictators? I suppose moving to this small community was the wooden stake in my heart. No where to walk, just fields of dust or (soon to be) snow. And the community is ~nil. Tried making friends earlier, but the people protested on day and told me that I was the wrong kind of people, and that they did not share my interests (which by the way are gaming). My symptoms? depression, anxiety, OCD-like preoccupations, I just don't feel like doing anything. I get sick alot too now, twice a month, or so. Why did I move to this damned place?
I was hardly anything like this... two years back, before I moved here, or started my MSc at the university. I was active, spontaneous, funny, musical, patient, and fun. Now .. just damn it all to hell. I sometimes casually think of sepuku, but I can't do this to my loved ones, who are more estranged by the day.
They keep telling me it will soon be over, and that my work at this infernal place will be completed, and that I will get a job with more people to interact with; but lately I don't believe any of it. Just last week I had an interview with a laboratory, who did not hire me because I was too 'leftist'; an artist...
I know now that I would rather be a beggar talking to people in a soup kitchen than a millionaire living in seclusion (sry H.H.).
I have to get out of here... before something horrible happens OX
I find it humorous that a
I find it humorous that a Bryn Mawr student wrote a paper about the effects of solitary confinement while I, once a Bryn Mawr student, lived the effects of solitary confinement. What does she know if anything about how solitary confinement affects the mind? She thinks because she reads a few reports and because she spends the weekend alone that she could possibly understand. Remember I know where she is coming from: Bryn Mawr, where everyone thinks they are so socially concious and understanding. Well understand this, her paper doesn't even touch the "lonely madness" that exists in solitary confinement, because she seems to think that being locked in the cell is the worst part, it's not, it's all the bonuses that come with it that drive you mad.
i find yr comment humorous
a research paper and/or report is simply the integration of facts and concepts of other people; therefore, it is not the author herself who believes she knows it all loner.
I don't feel the psychological profession is LISTENING
I am living in near total isolation and I cannot get help!!! I have spent this entire weekend alone. No one, not one goddam person should have to face demons alone, day after day, year after year.
I still strongly believe the psychology professions ONLY REAL GOAL is profit. Theres a gap between psychology and online dating and online dating is destroying us and we're LETTING IT. People don't meet face to face any longer and women rule supreme in dating. If a women decided collectively never to meet a certain person face to face, not give him or her a chance- that person would literally die alone. That is almost what is happening.
I FERVENTLY believe on line dating services should be banned, made illegal and that there should be free community services in EACH community geared SPECIFICALLY toward helping people meet and find mates. Capitalism, in my opinion, destroys nearly everything it touches. The philosophy is that nothing is worth doing that doesn't make a profit and since it would be unprofitable to conduct matching/ pairing- psychology won't touch it and I quote:
> "The Greater Good and the Greater Profit are not compatible aims" -- Yann Martel.
I will succeed at suicide. Eventually. I simply have lost hope and I feel dead inside.
My mother had schizophrenia
My mother had schizophrenia im 24 now i was the only child' times were very hard an hostlyel' i got atopted by my arn't who was also crackers aswell' she died when i was 18' i had nobody in this whole world and it hasn't changed from thier' that feelin when you got nobody to ring or call kill yhe soul' girlfreinds don't stay long dispite that i loved them deeply' ive found it so hard to be part of the so called "norm sociaty' im very clever an good looking but i don't know how to socailize i just can not get round it' i just don't no what ever to say' 2 years of being single at 24? sex i get yea but emosional sorport no' i feel so alone in a world of milloins of peaple'
you sound very similiar to
you sound very similiar to me, except i am 20. my mother is schizophrenic as well and i am an only child.
Hello Sharon Thank-you for
Hello Sharon
Thank-you for your post. You are obviously a very strong, courageous person who is acutely away of the emotions that you experience. You have taken the first step in breaking your social isolation by expressing how you feel. It doesn’t sound like you are pissed off at everyone or sucking your thumb but that you have taken responsibility by articulating your emotions. One of the best ways to isolate a person is to deny or belittle the feelings that they are experiencing. How I get out of the house and socially interact is by drawing. I sit in clubs and draw bands and musicians playing. This keeps the boredom at bay and helps to create small talk among the patrons. I usually keep the small talk to a minimum though as I am not endeavoring to make new friends as I already have a social network. I make myself do this as I am not a social person that likes going out and I am usually shy. But I do make an effort to keep social interactions up and I am very selective of where I go. I seek out people or places that I relate to. Heading into an event where I realize that I am either politically or morally different is stressful. This is where socialization has taught me to keep my head down and just observed…the funny people! Yes they have every right to be here to and express their opinions. Good on you for voicing how you feel.
sharon...are you still out there?
list five things you enjoy or might enjoy doing that would involve other people--like bicycle riding, jogging, kayaking, quilt making, tai chi, yoga, taikwondo, reading, seeing movies, singing, acting, and so on. then pursue at least two of those like your life depends on it. search the local internet guide to events in your area, go to the library and search their community events and activities, go to stores that sell the things it would take to engage in the activity on the list and ask about groups that practice that activity. enroll in a class to study something you've always been interested in...
being pissed off at everybody else and sucking your thumb is your only real problem. take responsibility and make some other decisions in your life to connect with people. stick with it. find a way to contribute to the group. go to nursing homes and read to people who can no longer choose to get out. join habitat for humanity and contribute to a group interested in helping others better their lives. be the change you want to see in the world. you want people to come to you? go to them. you want to receive friendship, comfort, compassion, and health in your life? focus on others first. you know what it's like to be lonely and isolated, go out and ease someone else's struggle.
you might also consider finding a hormone specialist to help you get some stuff balanced internally. hang in there--your life is worth living---just keep pursuing the reasons why...
I was reading this paper in
I was reading this paper in response to a course that I am doing at my church. I don't really know too much about social isolation, but your letter, Sharon has really touched my heart. It is sad to know that another human being out there is suffering in the way that you have described. I think you have some good insight into the situation with online dating. So much of our social interaction has been made virtual. I am sorry that you are facing such a terrible time and I know that there is not much that I can possibly do to help you other than to let you know that I have prayed for you today. I pray that God will give you peace today.
Isolation
"God is Dead" ~ Nietzche. I am in full agreement with Sharon. I never found a friend in Jesus. I was always the lost lamb, but Jesus never came looking for me; even when I was crying in the woods. At times when I tried to believe, not one - not one God D*** prayer of mine was ever answered. The only way to find love and peace is through death. All I know is that in the year 1864 I do not remember feeling any pain, rejection, or sorrow. I simply did not exist. Such a beautiful feeling.
God
I have no pyschological background nor do I intend on talking to you about pyschology. However, what I am going to talk to you about is something so more important than some silly theory or study; God. Do you have children? If so I want you to picture them staked by hands and feet to a cross... I want you to picture having the power to stop that at any moment but not... God sent His ONLY SON TO DIE ON THE CROSS FOR OUR...OUR SINS He was absolutly sinless yet He died for us... All He wants in return is for you to believe and to lay down your life for Him. I don't know about you but that sounds like a pretty good deal to me. I am a Christian and I am going to Heaven. And I kow you have to search for Him and let Him in not just expect Him to one day do whatever it is that you want Him to do. This is not meant as a criticism in any way, if anything hopefully a eye opener for you or anyone who reads this.. God loves you and so do I
pray for me
to remove this thorn in my fresh in at a home environment. yes i m a born again christian. i m 54 yr old n my mom is old n i want her to see me minus this thorn so that i can live as a christian, just a christian life till the end. God bless.Adrian E
this is a joke right? for a
this is a joke right? for a second i thought you were serious, but then i got it and it made me laugh. thank you for the bringing humor to a serious subject. :)
My reflection
In commenting ,
on the psychological effects of individuals being in an isolated social or natural environment , it is difficult to fully determine the true effects.Reason being every individual adapts differently to different environments physically , mentally, and spiritually.Its interesting to note how animals born in captivity cope better with being in a zoo, to that of animals trapped in the wild. Mans and womens perceptions of ourselves and others can never fully be understood.The reason I feel is due to humanity being deprived of why we are all really here. People are already lost and isolated in their minds , even though they attempt to co-exist with each other in a ostensible manner.The majority of your article focused on the negetives of isoation. In order to keep my sanity I feel it is important to protect myself from a greedy ,self absorbed society driven by majority groups whom control minority groups.
Loneliness in Prisons in Sri lanka
I read your article 'Lonely Madness: The Effects of Solitary Confinement and Social Isolation on Mental and Emotional Health. Fantastic! I did a survey in the remand prison in Colombo, Sri Lanka for six months (November 2009 to May 2010) on this theme and several other criminolegal aspects. Loneliness is killing! I myself stayed inside as an inmate. My book on the research will be out in September. Keep in touch! At the moment I am giving the final touches to the book.