Serendip is an independent site partnering with faculty at multiple colleges and universities around the world. Happy exploring!

weather and feelings?

sara.gladwin's picture

“I don't know. Poets are always taking the weather so personally. They're always sticking their emotions in things that have no emotions” – Holden Caulfield from Catcher in the Rye

I brought a lot of guilt into my space today. I felt guilty for not having yet finished writing an essay due today, guilty for feeling behind. I felt guilty for having to set aside time to sit when I hadn’t finished all my other work; for not managing my time well enough to give all my work the equal attention it deserved. Everything seemed to serve as a reminder of this guilt; the breeze that made my attempts at keeping my papers together futile, the people who stopped to talk to me reminded me of the distractions I allowed to take precedence in my life. I began to really think about the way we impose emotions in a space. I thought about the way I perceived the weather almost as a malicious bully, working against me. While I doubt the weather itself had very little mal-intent toward me… I resented it, and the almost playful way the wind would pick up my homework and scatter it across the grass, as if to tease my attempts at being a good student.  What on earth are you studying for? I imagined the bully to say, giving some of my index cards a hefty toss away from me, and laughing as I scrambled to catch my precious study cards.

Ironically, the guilt I brought into the space soon found a new focus; I felt guilty for demonizing the weather. It was not the environment’s fault my work wasn’t finished. It knew nothing of homework or papers or anything I feel is paramount to my existence on campus.