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Mifepristone..."The Abortion Pill": The Facts

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Biology 103
2000 First Web Report
On Serendip

Mifepristone..."The Abortion Pill": The Facts

Sujatha Sebastian

On September 28, 2000 the Food and Drug Administration after several years of research approved Mifepristone, better known as the "abortion pill", for distribution in the United States. The FDA's decision will have a definite impact on women's health care in the United States. There will be social and medical repercussions. The drug has caused controversy not only in antiabortion groups, but in Pro-Choice groups as well. Critics are worried that an abortion available in pill form will be "too easy". They are worried that use of the pill will be abused. What many people do not realize is that while Mifepristone will be beneficial to women's health care, it is not without side effects. In light of all the recent coverage that the "abortion pill" has been given in the media, and all the misinformation surrounding it, I decided researching that Mifepristone would be interesting and helpful. The purpose of my paper is to discover how Mifepristone works, how it is administered, and to look at its side effects. I want to demonstrate the benefit Mifepristone will be to women's health care, while showing that it is not an "easy" solution to abortion.

"Mifepristone, formerly known as RU-486, is a medical alternative to aspiration abortion."(1) It works by blocking progesterone from being absorbed into the uterus. When this happens the uterus sheds the endometrium (lining in the uterus, therefore inducing menstruation. (2 When Mifepristone is used as a method for abortion is it administered as part of a three step process. The first step is that 200 mg of Mifepristone is given orally in a doctor's office. Then within 24 to 48 hours the patient is given 400 mg a drug called Misoprostol either orally or in a suppository form. Misoprostol, which is a synthetic hormone, is used to get the cervix to soften and dilate as well as getting the uterus to relax. The embryo is then expelled.(2) This is supposed to happen approximately fours hours after the administration of the drug. The final step is an examination by a medical professional to make sure the abortion is complete. (2)

There are restrictions as to who can use this medical method of abortion. It is only intended for women to use up to nine weeks after their last menstruation period. Women who are under 18 or over 35, epileptic, diabetics, or suffering from heart, lung, kidney, liver, stomach or intestinal disorders are ineligible. As are women who have taken steroids within the past 12 months, or deemed overweight or a heavy smoker. Women who have used an IUD or hormonal contraceptive within three months prior to conception are not allowed to take Mifepristone as well.(2)

Like any drug or medical method there are side effects to using Mifepristone and Misoprostol. It is the number of side effects and degree of each that critics argue about. The FDA has determined that taking Mifepristone does cause various degrees of pain. Short term physical effects can be pelvic pain, vaginal bleeding, nausea, diarrhea, and fatigue.(2) There are psychological side effects as well. In some cases products of the conception are visualized. (3)

The use of Mifepristone will have a definite impact on reproductive freedom in this country and the world. (3) It is seen as less invasive procedure which gives the woman more freedom and privacy. In the United States it has been reported by the Alan Guttmacher Institute that eighty-nine percent of the abortions occur in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. Mifepristone will allow women another option to terminate a pregnancy in its early stages. (2) Twenty-four percent of the world's population lives in places where abortion is not legal. (3) As a result a significant population of women perform their own abortions or receive illegal abortions which kills them. The medical method of abortion would allow women in these areas of the world to receive a safe method of abortion.

A major issue that critics of Mifepristone have is that they feel that the drug will allow abortions to become "too easy". But the drug is only administered in a medical office and requires at least three visits. The last visit is an examination to see that the abortion is complete and that the mother is in good health. Before the patient is given Mifeprex tablets (Mifepristone) she must sign an agreement in which she acknowledges that there are side effects, that there is a three step process, and that 5 to 8 women out of every hundred do not have successful medical abortions and need surgical abortions . (5) Critics worry that the drug will cause an increase in the number of women who have abortions. Supporters of the drug cite the fact that in France, where the drug is manufactured and was first administered, there has not been an increase in the abortion rate. (2)

Mifepristone will change the way that abortions are administered. This method gives a woman more autonomy and does not require her to go through surgical procedure. It can also prevent pregnancy by taken as soon as a day after she has had intercourse. This new method will allow more women to have access to safe abortions. Mifepristone opens the door to a new area of medicine in which previously surgical procedures are now approached in a medical manner. Whether in support of or against Mifepristone one has to recognize the new technology the drug represents.

One of the problems I had when researching information was finding unbiased information. Both pro and anti Mifepristone groups used "research" and statistics to their benefit. Distinguishing the difference between opinion and fact was difficult. This is especially true because there is not a lot of accurate information about Mifepristone published by reliable sources. This is due to the fact that Mifepristone has just recently been approved by the Food and Drug Administration. Mifepristone that will be beneficial to women's health care and medicine. But one must realize that it is not without side effects and cannot be seen as an "easy" solution to abortion.

 

WWW Sources

1)www.plannedparenthood.org/mifepristone.html, Mifepristone

2)www.rascalnut.com/naral.ohio/RU486.html, The Facts about Mifepristone (RU 486)

3)www.mja.com.au/public/issues/sep15/henshaw/henshaw.html, Mifepristone

4)http://jinx.sis.unsw.edu.au/~greenlft/1994/137/137p28htm, "Abortion Pill": A Woman's Right to Choose by, Kath Gelber

5)www.popcouncil.orgrhpdev/mifeprex/patient%5Fagreement.html,The Patient Agreement Mifeprex (Mifepristone) Tablets

6) www.pages.map.com/lroberge/ru486.htm, RU486: The Hidden Effects by Lawrence F. Roberge

6) www.nrlc.org/ru486/propsedFDAregs.html, RU486 *Please note that some of the sources read during my research were from biased sources (the National Right to Life Committee web site for example). Facts were not used from these sources in my paper. These sources were instead used to discover the arguments anti-Mifepristone groups had and to see the false information they were publishing about the drug.

 

 

Continuing conversation
(to contribute your own observations/thoughts, post a comment below)

08/06/2005, from a Reader on the Web

I took that pill and almost blead to death now i have have to say it's not as easy as it sounds it is very painful like child birth but more blooder atleast for me i now have endromitrious and may have to have my women parts removed i had nothing before i took those pills i'm 37 so i'm just saying better think it out before you take it because it's dangerious i have a son who is 18 it was easier for me to have him then go through childbirth than taking those pills becuse i'm still not well and it has been 7 months


10/10/2005, from a Reader on the Web

For what it's worth, I though I'd share my personal experience using Mifepristone almost a month ago.. After having made the difficult choice to abort, I learned of this pill as an alternative option to having the traditional surgical procedure. Of course, as anyone would, I opted to try the pill because it seemed -less- painful and was something I could do in the privacy of my own home. After having been given the first pill, Mifepristone, at the doctors office on a Friday afternoon, I finished out my day at work with minimal side-effects at that point. The Mifepristone made me slightly sick to my stomach, but compared to the ongoing morning sickness I'd been going through, it wasn't so bad. (ha ha) Misoprostol was the next step, given to me in the form of 4 tablets, to be inserted vaginally myself at home. I was also given a full bottle of Vicodin, as well as a bottle of 800mg Ibuprophen for the pain the doctor anticipated I would encounter (this worried me a little). Late Satuday afternoon, I'd say around 4:30pm, scared to death not knowing what to expect once everything started, and knowing I couldn't turn back now, I inserted the tablets and took 1 Vicodin as directed. About 30 minutes from the time I did this I began to have cramping comparable to what you would feel during a typical menstrual period.. but not for long. Within an hour I had severe cramping.. I'd been warned the pain could equal that of actual child-birth contractions, and this must have been it. (I've never had a child, so I can only imagine) I was to the point of feeling like I would pass out if the pain didn't let up when I passed the first, and largest, portion of what -was- the pregnancy.. Many people will tell you that all you'll see is blood and clots, and it's unlikely anything will look like actual tissue.. but mine sure did.. Large masses of gray tissue were expelled for the following numerous hours. Somewhere close to midnight that night I felt relief enough to know it was over.. or so I thought. 4 days after this, while I -should- have been feeling more or less back to normal, I began to experience increasing pain in my abdomen. I called and spoke with my doctor about this, but felt as though she didn't seem concerned at all. No more than 2 hours after hanging up the phone I developed a fever that shot through the roof out of nowhere, and my heart began beating unbelieveably TOO fast. The "increasing pain" in my abdomen now had me laying in bed, hardly able to move. I called my mother who left work and rushed to my home to get me. I couldn't even get out of bed to let her in when she arrived I hurt so bad. I ended up in the emergency room that afternoon with a heartbeat of 143 beats/min.. (Check your own and then you'll see just how high 143 is) and a 103 temperature I ended up fighting to keep away for the next 4 days. To make a long story short, that first afternoon I spent over 8 hours in a treatment room in the emergency area before they got my vitals under control and discovered the cause of everything.. The abortion pill I used began attacking my own body in a sense, and began a horrendous infection in my uterus. In the end I spent a week in the hospital on 3 of the most potent anti-biotics available, as well as some heavy-duty narcotic pain killers, while specialists from the surrounding hospitals kept watch over me constantly. It's now been almost a month since then, and I still have to have blood work done, as well as ultrasounds every now and then to keep monitoring my recovery. I have constant sharp pains in my abdomen and have been told the scar tissue left over from the infection may now keep me from becoming pregnant in the future.. It's all so much to deal with, and honestly, I don't think I've come to terms with everything yet. It still feels like a bad dream. Regardless of my experience with the pill and side effects it caused me, I can still step back and look at the broad picture of things.. The majority of women who use this method have no problems, and for them, this is a good way to go. I really do think it's a better choice for most, than to have the surgical abortion.. BUT - be warned.. It's not "easy" using the pill, and there's no way to know how you're body will react to it. I never knew I'd go through the things I did because of it. This is definitely not something to be looked at as the "new contraceptive" either, as some are saying. It's so risky, putting your body through something like this. It could take a toll on you that will effect the rest of your life. Like me.. Will I ever be able to have kids after everything that happened? Every woman out there should begin by being aware of how to avoid an unwanted pregnancy from the start. Such as life happens, and most protection only offers 99.9% effectiveness, we forget that's NOT 100%.. If you still become pregnant and choose to abort, do your homework.. read about all possibilities, and all side effects for each.. then decide what's best for you. I think the pill is a great option.. but be careful, it's certainly not without it's flaws.

 

Additional comments made prior to 2007
It has been almost 2 months since I had made the painful decision to get an abortion. I am only 18 years old so you could imagine hoe scary it was for me. After they examined me and told me how far I was they put me in this rome with a female doctor so I can take the oral pill that actually determines the pregnancy. When I took that pill, I felt fine until I had to get something in my stomach, I couldn't even eat my stomach was turning so bad. the doctor told me that I could insert the four pills vaginally anytime between then and 48 hours after the visit. I decided to insert them that night to get it over with and about an hour after it was literally hell. I was vomiting,bleeding perfusely, and experiencing pain more severe then I had ever felt before. To make a long story shorter, it has been about 2 months and I still haven't exactl stopped bleeding. I am young and afaid to go get checked because of it, and my life will never be the same. I had no choice my situation at the time wasn't what I wanted and now I will always regret it ... Reader on the web, 12 August 2007

 

 

I used the pill around february of '07. I was 6 1/2 weeks and I guess I didnt really know what I was getting myself into. I took the first pill which I had no side effects to. When I took the second one the next day, it was almost immediate cramping. Basically the worst cramps I had ever had. I was puking, had diarrea, and was in so much pain I was balled up on the couch crying. I guess I was a "lucky" one because my horrible cramps only lasted about an hour until I passed the birth tissue and then they subsided. Although I bled for a month after that (most of it not heavy), I completly regret it to this day. All I can ever think about is a perfectly beautiful child is now in a sewer somewhere. It's horrible, but thats how I think of it now. I wish I could go back and change things. I wish I never did it. All I hope is that it didnt hurt my chances of having a child in the future ... Reader on the web, 13 September 2007

Comments

Serendip Visitor's picture

scared .

Hello, I'm 21 years old and I'm 6 1/2 weeks pregnant . I went to take my first abortion pill yesterday (7/7/2011) and today around 4:05pm I have to take the other 4 pills . I'm scared to death and really hopes this goes well . I've thrown up like 4 times today and don't even know why . I haven't really had a appetite to eat and I believe I supposed to have a nice meal before I take the pills . Right now I just feel sick to my stomach and I haven't really got out of bed . Just been sippin on water . I can't have the baby because I'm not ready to be a mother . I just want some encouragement .

Serendip Visitor's picture

You'll be fine..

I am on my second full day after taking my four pills. I have been a bit nauseous but have found that over the counter anti-nausea meds do the trick just fine (the chewables work the fastest..literally have saved me a few times). It's best to keep a hot water bottle or heating pad around for the cramps and be sure to take your painkillers and ibuprofen an hour before you take the 4 pills. That way they will have well kicked in by the time the other meds do. Be sure to take the pain meds and ibuprofen every 5 hours. Just relax and get as comfortable as possible, for most people the medication will start the abortion process within a few hours. Try and stay awake for the first 8 hours simply to monitor the amount you are bleeding. If you have to sleep set an alarm for an hour or two just to be sure.

Anassa kata, '05's picture

Serendip is so amazing, loan payments hurt less.

Ladies and girls doing your research about early abortion options, a word:

You already know, but it helps to know again. Every body is different, and only you know your life and mind. Trust yourself to make the best decision for you.

When a uterus moves something from inside itself down through an opening in the cervix into the vagina--whether that something is your period, an embryo or fetus, or a fully grown baby--that strong muscular organ has to contract. The muscle clenches and releases, and this is why you feel cramping. The opening in your cervix is *tiny tiny tiny,* and tinier if you have never given birth before. The larger the object passing through that point, the more it will hurt. Among other reasons, this is why the sooner, the better when a woman chooses abortion.

It is guaranteed that any way you deal with this pregnancy is going to physically hurt, and you are going to bleed. This is life--life hurts and life bleeds us. Life gives us the chance to heal and learn.

<3 <3 Take care of yourselves out there! <3 <3

--former Planned Parenthood counselor, current nursing student, personal experience with abortion and miscarriage

Serendip Visitor's picture

m really worried

hi i took the first pill yesterday and some ppl are telling me that i wont be able to have a baby again now m worried nd tense what if i never concieve again..i mean can i avoid taking the second pill and mange to carry this pregenancy.

visitor's picture

thats not true, dont allow

thats not true, dont allow anyone scare you, no one will be offered to take the pills at marie stopes if they well know the pills wont make you able to concieve again.

Serendip Visitor's picture

abortion pill

Don't be afraid. I never heard anything about not being able to conceive again. If you do not take the other set of pills then your baby can be born with problems. But do not be scared. I was terrified. I took my first pill on the 5th which was tuesday and I took the other 4 pills yesterday on wednesday.

visitor's picture

hi

How long pregnant were u at the time??? did it work???

Haley's picture

to the girl asking if she willl be barren

this is in response to :
"hi i took the first pill yesterday and some ppl are telling me that i wont be able to have a baby again now m worried nd tense what if i never concieve again..i mean can i avoid taking the second pill and mange to carry this pregenancy."

Two things - taking the pill does not make you barren unless you have rare &/or severe complications. However, you SHOULDN'T take it if you are in your second trimester!!
The second point is in answer to your question - YES, YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR MIND and NOT take the second pill!
However, if you are seriously changing your mind and want to keep your baby or select another option and NOT abort, then call a doctor who can give you something to counteract any effect of the first pill. The first pill does not necessarily kill the baby and there are many stories of girls who have changed their mind, skipped the second pill, and deliveered healthy babies. Look into this online - but seriously, go to a regular doctor NOT the one who gave you the pills. Find a real OBGYN or go to the hospital emergency room. Make sure you find the right doctor and tell them you NEED to save this baby and please tell you your best chances.

Good luck whatever you do. Remember, you will most likely be ok either way; you probably will be able to have kids in the future, but you can also have a healthy baby if you choose at this point even though you took the first pill. Just see a doctor as soon as possible.

Serendip Visitor's picture

Generally speaking, the first

Generally speaking, the first pill is what terminates the pregnancy not the second ones. The first pills stop the body from producing progesterone, which is essential for the continuation of the pregnancy. If you were to only take the first pill without the second ones, the embryo would come out at a later more unpredictable time. The second set of pills only clear out the uterus, it doesn't cause the termination, but allows you to better plan and control when the evacuation will happen. I have never heard of this being reversed, however in very limited cases it doesn't work and the woman continues to be pregnant. The chance of severe birth defects and deformity is extremely high if this happens.

Serendip Visitor's picture

My situation is diffrent

I had the abortion pill last week. My situation is diffrent than all of you because I am virgin. My culture is very stricked about this and girls should lose their virginity when they get married only. This is very serious and I was shoked when I knew I am pregnant because I was virgin, and me and my boyfriend were just playing around it, I mean it is really rare to get pregnant without deep inserting. I chose to take the pill because they told me its gonna be like heavy perion and It will not damage the area. I did take it and It was not that bad experiance...my only concern is that my follow up appointmment gonna be next Thursday and I am sooooo scared that they will tell me I will need a surgical abortion in case it was not complete abortion...if i did a surgical abortion they will insert instrument in me and this will defintly damage the area and this will leave me with not only the guilt of aboting but also loosing my virginity and living in shame all my life...I know it will sounds funny to some of you but loosing my virginity is really serious to me...my question is how many women had to do a surgical abortion after taking the pills?...thanks

Serendip Visitor's picture

abortion pill fee

hi, so i do not know yet if i am pregnant...i am three days late,
but i have to keep in mind that if i end up pregnant i will abort it
because i cannot afford to have a child and it will grow up without a dad

now it sounds easy to go and get the pill
but wat worries me the most is not being able
to pay for it....what if i have no income, no insurance
and the baby's dad will definitely will not be there

can they help me pay for the abortion?
if they dont charge me all of it do i have to
pay up front? or can i make payment plans?

again i hope i dont get critiziced by asking this question
again im not ignorant, i had sex with protection
unfortunately it can fail and i feel thats what happened to me
i am not ready to become a mother or bring a child to suffer to
this world

San Sebastain's picture

apply for emergency medi-cal.

apply for emergency medi-cal. that will pay for it. that's what i am going to do today.

Serendip Visitor's picture

abortion pill fee

is there any things i need to take?

if i apply for it will my job find out about it?

San Sebastain's picture

Abortion Pill

I am scared. I am supposed to take the first pill on the 5th. I am terrified. I am 5weeks and I do not know how my body will react to the medication.

Serendip Visitor's picture

I'm scared too

I am taking the pill at five weeks too....which will be the 30th.. I'd like to know what it's like for you so far?

Serendip Visitor's picture

I actually completed the

I actually completed the process. The cramps were not really bad. I slept through them and the bleeding was very light. It lasted a whole and then the bleeding stopped the say of my follow up the 7/12/2011. I just had diarrhea and throwing up a few times, but there was no real severe pain or bleeding. You should not be scared or frightened at all. Just make sure that you lay down and relax.

Serendip Visitor's picture

That is very encouraging. I

That is very encouraging. I hope it goes that well with mine. Thank you!

San Sebastain's picture

Abortion Pill

Hi I am pregnant now and I do not know how far along I am. However, I am considering the pill and the stories are different and scary. Some are more consoling than others. Everybody's body is different and I would just like to know what I need to look for once I go through with the process.

Yvette 's picture

Don't do it I did one the

Don't do it I did one the other day cuz I was scare I'm about to be 20 and I let my bf get to me. Now I see all these girl with bellies n baby out there it hurt you still have the chance don't do it I wish I could go back but I can't, if you decided to do it remember you can never go back not even if that you dream :( I wish I had my baby inside me but I don't.

San Sebastain's picture

How did the pill make you

How did the pill make you feel?

Serendip Visitor's picture

Today makes 2 weeks

Today marks two weeks for my medical abortion. I took the initial pill on fri. No side effects. I then took the next 4 in my buccal space on sat. I started getting cramps within 30min. But it was bearable. 4 hours later I literally felt a pop (my water breaking) and thats when it really started. It was very heavy bleeding, but not too painful. Yes the cramps were intense at times but again, nothing too painful. The worst part of the exp. Was looking into the toilet while I passed everything. Dont do it. Do NOT LOOK INTO THE TOILET. I was horrified. the worst of it was over within a few hours but I continued to pass clots for the next few days. I did end up getting an infection in my uterus. The doc gave me an antibiotic which I took in one day and it cleared up. The blood was a strange color and had a horrible smell. But today, the bleeding finally stopped and the only lasting effecys is the emotional pain of having had to abort a baby I so desperately wanted to keep. The guilt and.sense of loss is almost unbearable at times. Good luck, and if any of u want to ask any questions, or just talk dont hesitate to send me a msg.
Sad and alone in texas.....

Serendip Visitor's picture

Today

I have an appt. Today to begin the pill process. I am terrified after reading some of these posts. I desperately want to keep my baby, but my current circumstances make it impossible. I am wobdering if an actual surgical abortion is better than the pill now that I have read the horror stories about the pill. now I am more worried than ever. Does anyone have any advice that might help me? I can't believe I got myself into this, what should have been a blessing . I feel so guilty :.(

San Sebastain's picture

I am more terrified of the

I am more terrified of the surgical procedure than the pill. Everyone's body is different and may take differently to the pill than what everybody else is saying happened to them. However, I am still scared.

Serendip Visitor's picture

Dont do it... i was bleeding

Dont do it... i was bleeding to death wen u took the pills. I past out several times nd ended up.styain in the hospital for 1 week. I almost lost my uterus but thank god doctors were able to save it. I had to get a blood transfusion.. 4 lil bag... worst experience in my life

Serendip Visitor's picture

HELP

I took the pill in April 3 months, i still don't have a period???? All of my test are NEG?

San Sebastain's picture

I do have a question/ How was

I do have a question/ How was the pain and bleeding for you? If you do not mind me asking.

Trisha's picture

Pregnant...about to abort

Hi.Im 21 and im about 8 weeks pregnant. well i supposed to go for the medical abortion pill today, and like 5 times before but my bf lets me down all the time. He drink 2 much last night and cud not wake up in time for the procedure. Anyway, i have a loving family and the youngest child of 4 kids. I have to do this abortion as my family will be so disappointed in me and their reputation will be tarnished, same goes for my bf's family. He is supportive but im tired of hearing his shit about taking me. This is so hard 4 me as its my first preg and i cant believe im about to hurt my innocent baby. But girls sometimes in life we have to think about the future and dont bring a baby in this world when u know u cant gurantee happiness. I feel like a muderer but im doing this for myself and my baby. Dont feel alone in times like this, make sure you have atleast 1 friend u can talk 2. Wish me luck as im so scared.

Shelly's picture

understand

I completely understand ur situation. I'm kind of in the same situation, expect the father doesn't drink and is supportive. It has has been on my mind heavy and I went today and took my first pill, and still have the other pills to insert. It's been a hard decision, but know what's best for u! There are always person that judge or guilt, but u know u better than anyone else and u are not allow! Best wishes and good luck on whatever decision u make!

trisha's picture

Reply to prev msg

Hi guys....wow the response is so amzing..thank u 4 ur views and comments. I went for it on Monday but unfortunately i found out that im 11 weeks pregnant. I am still so shocked and hurt. But i cannot keep this baby as i have drank alcohol many times before i found out that i was preganant and i never took care of my body. so how can i let my innocent child step into my life knowing i took no care. Anyway i will be visiting a private gnaecologists on monday to do a procedure. not sure what it is really called, but in SA its a MSP. They are going to sedate me and insert some kind of objects in me to clean my cervix. i really hope that i manage and i have no further complications. I am still so terrified and i cant stop crying when i think of what i am about to do. I will really regret this when i want to start a family. Take care all

Serendip Visitor's picture

Hiya I'm from the uk and I'm

Hiya I'm from the uk and I'm going for the pills tomorrow I'm just wondering why you wouldn't be able to take them at 11 weeks as I'm nearly 12 weeks and have no option but to take the pill as hospital said surgery has to many complications I'm so scared as I have read the pill shouldn't be taken after 9 weeks

Haley's picture

Trisha 2

Trisha, sorry I just feel like I have to say what I wish someone had said to me - Abortion changed my whole life. Please just think about what will happen after and what will go through your head.
Regret is worst than death sometimes.
This was my first pregnancy. The doctor who performed the abortion said that my baby was 6 weeks 4 days. I will never know if I was really 6.5 weeks pregnant, or if I was 8.5 weeks and the doc was commenting on the developmemnt of the baby - these are questions that will haunt me forever.

If I ever have kids in the future, my life will always be tainted by the pain, the hurt, and the memory of this loss and what I've done.

I never got to experience the joys and excitements (and fears) of first pregnancy. I grieve for those lost experiences even as I grieve for the loss of my little angel. In my right mind I would never have done what I did and choose the most horrific thing I can ever imagine doing.
No one understands unless they've gone through it how you're in a state of fog when you're faced with an unplanned pregnancy. But now looking back I can tell you with 20/20 hindsight that nothing else matters except the precious life of your baby.

I will never get back all those firsts. I made it 6 or 8 weeks - not even into my 2nd trimester. But I will always have that first pregnancy memory as the single most tragic and regretful event of my life.

You don't think about things like that before abortion. It only all hits you later. I had my abortion May 7th and it only gets worse. That whole first week after the procedure I was still in a state of shock. I didn't process until maybe the week after. And I'm still processing now. I can't imagine ever getting over this, and my head and my heart will always be with that little baby.
Please, let your first pregnancy be one of hopeful expectancy like it was meant to be - at least that's how I feel now. I feel like I ruined my whole life. I don't know you, but I would do anything to go back and be where you are now - to still have the decision, to still have a chane to save my child.
Instead, my child was sentenced - by me - to be among those deemed unwanted by their own mothers. My child is & never was unwanted. I love my child more than I love my own life. And I would give up everything I own to have him back & to get a chance to do it over. How could I have done that? I tarnished the memory of my child forever, to have that label. The label of unwanted and discarded. You don't even know all the things that hit you and affect you and run through your mind after.
Please don't let the lack of support influence your decision like I did. If I would look you in the face , I would beg you. I would take you home and let you stay with me for as long as you needed to. Because I feel like it's the only thing I can do on this earth to honor my baby's memory - a memory no one else will ever share except me & my boyfriend because my baby never existed to anyone else. There are places that will take you in and take care of your medical bills and give you the support (emotional & financial) and its NOT only adoption places - believe me, I became so obsessed with babies and pregnancy probably as a way to punish myself on some subconscious level, but please just don't become one of the many like me who go along with someothing they don't really want to do, but feel they have no choice. Because now I see that this was NOT my only choice - it shouldn't have even been an option in my mind.
I'm thinking of you either way as you go through this crazy time. Take care of yourself!

Haley's picture

Trisha

Please look at this as your second chance. You went for the procedure and found out they couldn't do it that day. I wish so much that could have happened to me because I would have changed my mind if I'd had that extra time to think about it. I literally found out I was pregnant on a Monday, talked about it with my boyfriend Wednesday, and then made the appointment for that Saturday. I only had 5 days to process that information that I was pregnant and I wish more than anything I had thought about it more.
I also had a few drinks before I found out - not that I'm a party girl, but my friend's fiance had a bachelorette party and I had a couple glasses of champagne and I used to drink wine at home when watching tv with my boyfriend. OUR GRANDPARENTS USED TO DRINK ALCOHOL WHILE PREGNANT AND SOME EVEN SMOKED!! LOOK AT HOW MANY OF US CAME OUT PERFECTLY NORMAL & OUR PARENTS TOO!! During the first trimester a baby is more resilient I think. Talk to a real doctor who doesn't perform abortions - like your regular gyno - about the fact that you drank before you found out. No one will judge you, I'm sure it happens more often than you think, and the fact that you care so much shows that you care about this baby.

Listen, I would give ANYthing - I would go through pain and torture if I could have my baby alive and well. I wished instatnly that I could change my decision. Please, Please don't go into this because you think you had to. I looked online for resources for pregnant women because I thought I couldn't have a baby right now, and for some sick and unkown reason, I never came up with anything from my google searches BEFORE the abortion, but now AFTER whan it's too late to make a difference, I found all these resources, including this:

Maybe I'm torturing myself by obsessively looking up all the options I COULD haev and should have taken when I was pregnant, but if it helps you to not live with the regrets I do, then it's worth torturing myself.
Please just think about it. I thought I'd be prepared to del with whatever came next, but I was so so wrong. I will never be able to get THAT baby back, and I'm so scared that if I ever bring myself to have more kids I will be such a terrible parent because I will always resent that those kids get to live when my first little baby, who I am so in love with, never got the chance because of me and my failure to act. I knew I woudl love this baby and I kept my mouth shut and just let abortion happen to me and my little baby.
Right now, I would be homeless int he street if I could just have my baby back. All the reasons that I thought made sense don't mean anything right now. To me, there was no reason, nothing worth living the rest of my life without ever having seen my child's face.
I really do wish you the best of luck, and if you end up going through with this procedure, I hope more than anything that you don't feel the way I do, but if you even have the slightest feeling for this baby and even a little bit wish you can keep him or her then please rethink this. Your baby is not likely to have any damage done by your drinking if that is your main reason for considering abortion. Please just look into all the experiences of women who regret their abortions so much. I wish I had done more searching before I had the procedure.

Melissa's picture

Thank You

I am so so sorry you are going through this. I am a single mother of two and just found out I have another one coming. I was seriously considering the pill abortion until I researched and came across all these testimonies. Yours especially..... has touched me the most I am in tears and cannot stop crying. Your testimony has touched my heart and has made me reconsider my decision to abort. I feel just as you decribed like I cannot take care of this baby but want it so much. If I go through with it I will never be the same. Come time for me to deliver and my baby is all gone I will be crushed and then years to come. All the bdays my precious baby will not have. Theres nothing like seeing your little angel for the first time after giving birth.....Nothing. All the worries and fear goes away and there is help out there. With my first pregnancy I was 17. My mother and I had made me an appointment to abort, at the last minute I changed my mind and cancelled it. My son is now 8 and is my most pride and precious posession. My moter and I both look at him and we could almost puke thinking he almost would not have been here today if I had went though with my appointment and killed him. Peole say its not "killing" but my son was just as alive inside of me as he is now a growing boy. That child was once a "fetus" and so called not a human yet as some would say. But hes as human as humanly possible. A heartbeat starts at just 21 days, tell me thats not as alive as alive gets. I had another baby girl 7 yrs later and considered adoption with her. Again so glad I didnt. I drank and did drugs with both my kids before I new I was pregnant and they are both healthy and wonderful, anyone who is doing such things you need to stop right away. Continued use of that stuff could result in things you dont wantto happen with your baby. Thank you so much for your story that has once agian changed my mind. God Bless You and everyone else who blogged here and told your story of flushing your baby down the toilet. I am proof here that the grey blob you flushed down the toilet would have one day given you the most undescribable joy with every waking moment, their first kakle, and their first "I love you mommy"........ anyone considering this, well please reconsider.

trisha's picture

Reply

Hi.Im not sure why i cannot view the msg to the person that said my story was soothing.u can contact me privately on .i would like to communicate and talk to someone who is in a situation like me.Take care

Haley's picture

To Trisha

I went through with an abortion for the seame reasons as you (well some of them). I didn't want to go, I didn't want to hurt my baby, but I couldn't face the possibility of telling anyone - my parents, my friends, other adults who I looked up to.
Having the abortion was the worst thing I could have done - it was the absolute wrong decision for me. I'm 27 - I know it's a little older than you, but I see kids of friends of mine and what nasty terrible parents they are - yelling at their kids, making them feel like crap because they can't control their tempers, and I know my baby would have had a better life than them, but yet MY baby is gone and THOSE friends' kids deserved to live and have a chance at life?
These are the things that plague me. I'm not saying they'll plague you too, but I was instantly horrified after the abortion and I felt a lot like you.
Now looking back all the reasons I thought I had for choosing abortion are nothing & meaningless. I would gladly be homeless in the street right now if I could go back and change the decision I made and have my baby alive and well inside of me.
Please think this through. You will feel the change in your body when the baby is gone and if you're anything like me, it will make you sad. I miss my baby. I WISH I could feel him (or her, but I feel like it was a boy) again.
You can never go back and change this decision - it is irreversible. For me, it's a mistake I can never fix or change or make up for. Nothing can or will ever bring MY child back.
Whatever choice you make will be yours - because you can't be exactly like me, I know. But just consider my reality before you make your choice.
And look on the internet for other options - I found them all too late. If only I'd googled around before I went to that stupid clinic.
I thought I'd get over it and just live with my decision before I went through with it. Now I realize how wrong I was.
Good luck in whatever your outcome. I hope you don't live the reality I do now.

trisha's picture

Thank you all

Hi guys. Thank you all for your heart warming messages and advice. I have figured out that every individual is different and i have decided to go through this process.

I have been to the gynae today and will be doing the procedure on Monday. As heart breaking and emotional i am, i have to do this, due to family responsibility, career plans and financial issues.

I really want you all to pray that all goes well and when i am ready i will have a healthy baby/or even for me to be fertile. because im not ready to be a mother now, and i know someday when i am ready i will give everything for my baby. I love my baby that is inside me and i will always feel guilty but god does these things to make us think and realise whats right.

To my little angel, mummy is really sorry angel and i want you to know that i love you with all that i have. Please forgive me. I donot want to bring you into this world and have difficulties with your upbringing. I am so sorry sweetheart.

I know your'll may be thinking why i write the above, this is the only place where i can speak my heart out. Thank you all so much for your support and my advice TO ALL GIRLS THAT I HAVING SEXUAL INTERCOURSE ABD NOT READY TO HAVE A BABY: please spend allitle money on birth control or whatever that stops you from having a baby when u not ready, donot wait until u miss your deadline and realise you are preganant. Please i beg u 2 take extra care and take responsibilty of your actions. Abortion is not something that u can forget, it will eat you up everytym u see anything that has to do with a baby, let alone seeing a baby or hearin that any1 is expecting.

All the best. Take care and please be safe(i wish i were more responsible)

Love: Trisha

Haley's picture

response to Trisha

My thoughts are with you & my offer still stands. Call or email if you need to. I'm not sure if you received my emails. It might be easier to talk to a stranger than to someone you know.
Take care.

trisha's picture

Hi

Hi.Thank you for that heart throbing message.i really dont know what to do,really.I am so lost.heres my life simplified:
I am a 3rd year HR student, i teach indian dancing to over 30 kids, i have a loving family, 2 elder brothers and 1 older sister.1 brother is married with twin girls at 3 years.
My boyfriends family is a business family with a well known reputation as my family in our area. they have no babys in their family. his sister who is married is trying to have a baby for 3 years and has some difficulties. Now how can i bring a baby with all these things in my life. I have smoked and drank before i knew i was pregnant @ 7 weeks. i have danced so much in these weeks as we are booked. i have planned so many things in life to have a engagement and my studies. I am so confused and to make matters worse my boyfriend wants this baby now. Help me please.i wish i could just die and never live another day with this. I am starting to show that i am preganant.

Haley's picture

Trisha - email

I know it's confusing and difficult - I've been there. I also had a few drinks while pregnant because I didn't know I was pregnant. I also exercised pretty hard because i was extra hungry and didn't know it was because I was pregnant and I wanted to work off the extra calories. The funny thing is that when I went for the procedure, the staff there tested my blood and it turns out I would have had a healthy pregnancy - that only makes me feel worse now.

I sent you an email with my cell number if you want to talk because I WISH I had talked to someone about it and I didn't - I couldn't face anyone I knew, but you don't know me and you never have to see my face, so maybe it will help to talk to someone who you never have to meet.

Just remember that everything is going to be ok - no one ever told me that and I think I would have needed to hear it. Life WILL go on, even if your plans change slightly. You have a lot of possible options. Don't panic and don't feel helpless and out of control - You are the ONLY one in control here and don't let anyone make you feel otherwise. My thoughts are with you and you are NOT alone.
Call m if you need to - I mean that!

Serendip Visitor's picture

plss help

hi
if anyone can help answering my query that i had taken abortion pills on 1st may .. its already been two months now.. i hvnt got my next periods.. i jus wanna know how long it takes after abortion pills to have periods....
plssss help
does that mean m still pregnant .. but the test i did exactly after 4-5 days says negative.. wat now...

Serendip Visitor's picture

I had the procedure in early

I had the procedure in early may and I got mine 6 weeks after. They told me it's most common to get your period 4 to 6 weeks after you take the pill. Good luck!

Serendip Visitor's picture

8weeks prg. & monday

I'm 18 n I'm 8 weeks pregnant...
And this Monday I'm going in for the abortion pill ....
I'm really nervous but I just can't take care of an unwanted baby... But I hope everything goes good I have the support of my boyfriend, cousin,sister n friends but my parents don't know anything ...n I don't wish to tell too ashame too face them.
But I Hope its not as bad as everyone says it is.

Serendip Visitor's picture

hi, im 16 and i just had mine

hi, im 16 and i just had mine about a month ago,
and i can assure you there is nothing for you to be nervous about, my cramps weren't all that bad, they weren't any different from my normal period cramps. the bleeding was annoying though (buy lots of maxi pads!) mine lasted for about 2-3 weeks. Im glad you have so much support, but it would be nice to tell your parents, as soon as i found out i told my mom right away! She wasn't upset with me, she was only upset that she would never think it'd tell her! It made me and my mom closer in my opinion. Your parents love you no matter what, and it's best they know. I know what you mean by the ashamed feeling, i felt the same way, like my parents thought less of me, but i feel like they're proud of me for making my own choices, and i bet they would too. your 18 and deserve to have a happy, fun, young life!

thumbellina's picture

anyone had the pill after 10weeks gestation

i would like to hear from anyone who has had the abortion pill from after 10 weeks pregnant. does it hurt more and can you tell that its a baby when you pass it. this is baby no. 10 for me but dont know if i could cope with yet another little one. im so depressed trying to make the hardest decision of my life

Serendip Visitor's picture

yes i had a medical abortion

yes i had a medical abortion at 14 weeks due to my poor baby having trisomy 21 it wasnt so bad just like mild labour and over as soon as you pass baby its heart rendering and i didnt look at baby as i wwas extremly distressed at having to terminate but i can tell you they are around the size of the palm of your hand and have skin etc

Serendip Visitor's picture

Did i passed it or not?

Ok i took the first last tuesday june the 14 and the other 4 the next day im reading all these post about people seeing this gray shit coming out and all that all i seen was blood clots and they are not the size of goft balls, those that mean the pill did not work

Serendip Visitor's picture

Ok, I don't know where all

Ok, I don't know where all these horror stories about almost bleeding to death and being the worst pain ever are coming from, but considering experiences like that only count for about 1% of all medical abortions, maybe most of them are from a bunch of pro-lifers who want to scare girls into not taking the pill. :/
I just took the pills and it was nothing like the nightmarish experiences I'm reading about here (physically anyways). I personally didn't want to have an abortion but was faced with the decision of suffering some bad medical difficulties carrying the baby to term, or ending it now before it was too late. I, after a lot of though and guilt, chose to end it and try to have a baby at another time when I am healthier and not on so many meds that can cause birth defects to boot. I still feel horrible about having to end the pregnancy emotionally. But physically it wasn't even as bad as most of my periods I've had, and I think it's pretty shady to try scaring girls out of this safe method of early term abortion. Their reasons could be like mine, where they have to choose between their health and lives, or going through with a high risk pregnancy.
My bodily experience was easy, to say the least. I took the first pill on thursday with absolutely no noticeable side effects. Then this evening I began to bleed a little bit, so I took the last 4 pills by mouth. For the first hour I got a mild headache, some mild nausea, and few mild cramps that come and go, then I got up to go to the bathroom because I had to pee, and before I even made it to the toilet a few clots fell out, followed by the embryo. And that was it. For about an hour or two afterwards I had some light bleeding that has all about stopped now. My throat is a bit dry, my head and stomach still aches a tiny bit, and I am a bit dizzy and tired, but other than that, nothing bad happened.
Now idk, maybe mine went without a hitch because I was only 3 1/2 weeks pregnant, and maybe these horror stories are all coming from women who used it when they were almost finished with the 1st trimester, but a lot of them sound pretty over the top to me. That doesn't mean this is something you should use as birth control, and the choice to abort should never be taken lightly. I'm just saying if this is something you have to do, don't worry about it unless you really do start to experience horrid side effects. I haven't so far. So my honest experience is, while it is emotionally heartbreaking, it did not make me that sick. I hope my experience helped.

MS. Pitts 's picture

Response to ur post!

Hello I agree with ur post 100% I was 7 weeks when I took the pill and people said so many horror stories but when I took it! I can compare it to a normal period! I had diarrhea but that's all n spotted for weeks my only problem is I did it April 19 11 and I still haven't had a period!

Serendip Visitor's picture

Abortion is a different for every woman

For the women who said "it was easier than most periods," consider yourself very lucky. I entirely believe the other women's stories about the physical pain, as I had a similar experience. The cramps were so painful I was curled up crying in the fetal position for probably around 5 hours, and having to get up every few minutes to the toilet because I was heavily bleeding. What people don't realize when they read these stories is that every women's body is different. You could have a totally different experience. However, just know that it could be as bad as these stories. One mistake I think abortion clinics make is that they do not adequately warn you if how severe the physical pain and bleeding can be. I know I had no idea. Also, whether you are pro-life or not, an abortion will have emotion as l consequences. And at least in my case, have feelings of regret, and 'what if' thoughts. Hope this helps.

Serendip Visitor's picture

thank you.

thank you.