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For the sake of privacy and comfort...

llauher's picture
For the sake of privacy and comfort, my paper proposal has been emailed to Professor Dalke instead of posted on this forum. I hope that no one is offended by this choice. Because of my chosen topic and how personal it is, I fear backlash and harsh critique. If anyone protests to this choice, I would be willing to post it here. Please let me know if you would like to know what my topic is or have any questions or complaints.


Ann Dixon's picture

risktaking and assessment

Dear llauher,

Like Flora, I also respect your decision to go private. I think noone can quantify how much risk is involved except yourself, so consequently, you are the only one who can determine how courageous or not thoughts and acts are.

My concern for you is in the area of assessment, the grade at the end of the course. I think Anne is one of those professors who downplays assessment and grades in her courses, however, the College still requires her to give you a grade at the conclusion of the course.

If your research is so private that you can't post it here, I am concerned that you might be putting so much of your personal worth/struggle/identity into the work that being assessed on it at the end of the semester might be very painful to you. Anne strikes me as a mentoring guide more than authority figure, but she does need to play that role to satisfy the College's requirements of her. If your expectations of how she will react and assess your work are very different from her actual assessment, how will this affect you? and how will it affect her?

Good luck to you....

Ann '83

llauher's picture

Thank you for your feedback.

Thank you for your feedback. I think that your point is completely valid. I have considered it, and I will certainly "go public" with my topic. At this point, however, I feel as though it's a little raw and underdeveloped, which has a lot to do with the fact that Anne asked me to write in the first person. Once I have some concrete arguments to accompany my personal testimony (Linda Kauffman would sneer) I feel like I'll be much more capable of presenting my project in a public forum. Thank you for the concern and the good wishes!
smigliori's picture

Hmm. By not posting your

Hmm. By not posting your topic, you seem to have the only proposal that actually has comments on it. It makes me wonder whether you actually had anything to fear - except fear itself, of course. I feel the class can respect your decision, but I also think you have opened yourself up to far more criticism than your proposal is likely to have gotten.

Flora's picture

my reaction

Dear llauher,

I just want you to know that I completely respect your decision to withhold your paper from a public forum and even your choice to not attend class if it makes you too uncomfortable. I do not know enough about you to think these decisions make you uncourageous in any way. At the end of this semester, I will have finished 14 courses in gender and sexuality studies. In that time, I've seen many, many peers and myself do what we find necessary to protect ourselves in a classroom environment. Again, I completely support you. Everyone processes thoughts in different ways at different times. Please take care of yourself. If you choose to come back to class, as I selfishly hope you do, please let me know what I can do to work to make the classroom safer for you and to help in the development of your bravery.


llauher's picture

Flora, Thank you so much


Thank you so much for your support. It really helps (as a potential gender and sexuality major) to have someone who understands the amount of personal growth and exploration that can (and does) bleed into the academic environment. I certainly plan on being in class tomorrow- I think that will help me eliminate part of the fear that I have. And I will certainly be using your support as a crutch.

Thanks so much,


One Student's picture

A Reaction

I am not 'offended', and I do 'protest' your choice. I don't know what your topic is, so I can't compare it to mine, and I don't know what makes you think there would be 'backlash and harsh critique'. I am not complaining, and if you were to answer my questions, you'd lose your privacy and comfort anyway.

However, I have just posted my project proposal, which is a fairly raw expression of an issue which is for me very personal and difficult. This is not a safe space for me; in posting, I went outside my comfort zone (the whole ... situation is outside my comfort zone, of course, but talking about it in this context is even further).

I feel like I kept up my end of a bargain, but you didn't. I feel betrayed. I judge you and find you wanting in courage. It's not fair to you, since I'm sure most of our fellow students aren't doing their project on something intensely personal and sensitive. But that's my reaction. And maybe I'm being more honest than I ought to be, but having revealed that much of myself in my blog post, I'm primed to reveal some more of myself here.

I'm not requesting, advising, or suggesting any action on your part. I am not evaluating your actions in terms of right and wrong. Do what you want. Don't change your action on my account; it seems to me that that would be exchanging one discomfort (my critique of your action) for another (exposure). I acted in accordance with my principles (and they are principles of honesty and defiance), and in accordance with my own boldness, and despite my fear. I think you should act in accordance with your principles, your own ... whatever.