October 9, 2015 - 18:37
Sasha Moiseyev-Foster
ESEM: Changing Our Story
Professor J. Cohen
October 8, 2015
Wildness and Wilderness in Wild: From Lost to Found on the PCT
The wilderness, nearly ubiquitously across human cultures, is associated with freedom, beauty, and purity. However, the word ‘wild’ has a very different connotation. It is often used to denote savagery, lack of restraint, or chaos. Both the wilderness and ‘wildness’ are central themes in Cheryl Strayed’s autobiographical novel Wild. Over the course of the novel, Strayed displays a ‘wildness’ of emotion, action, and mental organization, and uses her experience within the ‘wild’ of the Pacific Crest Trail to tame herself.
In the aftermath of her mother’s death, Strayed’s life in addition to her life falls into disarray, and her mind with it. She develops very serious depression, and accordingly suffers from mood swings, unpredictable responses to life events, and a withdrawal from her social connections. Several years later her marriage has ended, many of her friends have ceased to be a part of her life, and her family ties are practically nonexistent. Her mind is wild in that she has no control of either her thoughts or emotions. She is wild in her grief, with no control over how she reacts to emotional stimuli, and retreating from both her relationships and society itself to proverbially lick her wounds. This wildness of the mind and heart is the most present example of the word within the text, though by no means the only one.
One archaic meaning to the word ‘wild’ is “sexually dissolute” (Douglass). Stayed engages in multiple affairs after the loss of her mother, in an attempt to cope with her deep depression. Her ‘wildness’ in regards to sexual affairs reoccurs frequently over the course of the book as well; Strayed at one point mentions telling her therapist that she thinks about sex “like a guy,” divorcing it from affection or morality. As her marriage falls apart, and she continues to engage in frequent affairs, ‘wild’ describes more and more aptly her state of mind. She falls into ever more bacchanalian antics as her depression grows and her relationships erode; she starts to take heroin, have unprotected sex, and generally neglect both her own health and wellbeing but also others. In many ways, she resembles a wild animal; free from forethought, impulse control, or social responsibilities. It is in this state that she approaches the trail.
As Strayed hikes the PCT, the wildness of the country she encounters is secondary to her mental state. Over the course of the book, ‘wild’ generally applies less to the trail itself (which is semi-cultivated, and therefore not truly wilderness) but to Strayed’s separation from society. She frequently spends entire stretches of days without seeing another human being, and in the absence of any contact with other people, she reflects inward on her wildness. Ironically, it is the presence of an outward ‘wild’ that allows Strayed to work through the wildness within her own mind, and come to terms with not only the loss of her mother, but the unpredictable chaos of life itself.
The word ‘wild’ has had several different definitions and connotations over the course of its existence, but in the context of Cheryl Strayed’s autobiographical memoir Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail, it means a lack of restraint, inhibition, or civility. Over the course of her journey, Strayed transitions from a ‘wild’ life and mind to a more concrete, healthy sense of self through her experiences in the ‘wilderness’ of the Pacific Crest Trail.
Works Cited
Harper, Douglass. "Online Etymology Dictionary." Online Etymology Dictionary. N.p., n.d. Web. 06 Oct. 2015.
Strayed, Cheryl. Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail. New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 2012. Print.