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The Island of Mystical Mystique
by Hilary McGowan, Fatima Quadri, Tim Richards, and Lucie Steinberg


Narrator: Charles Darwin, Walt Whitman, Siri Hustvedt, and Daniel Dennett mysteriously find themselves on a beautiful tropical island somewhere in the Pacific Ocean.

Dennett: My oh my, it seems we've somehow reached across the fabric of space and time to contemporaneously inhabit this quaint little island! Whatever could have brought such an odd gathering of us here together all at once?

Hustvedt: I have this memory of watching gilligan's island...maybe thats what this is.

Darwin: Look at all this plant life! Say, does anyone see any finches?

Whitman: Oh Charles, who needs finches when we have each other to study? Oh the beauty and life within us, isn't it wonderful?!

Husvedt: studying each other is obviously the best way to get off this island. lets make a couch out of coconuts and we'll each lie down and talk about our childhood

Darwin: Of course we can study each other, but it is the entire world in which we humans interact with the environment. From the tiniest earth worm to the largest elephant.

Whitman: But we are the worm and the elephant as well! Nature is us and we are nature, don't you see that?

Dennett: Say, how the hell did we get here, anyway?

Husvedt: i can't say how you got here daniel, but i got here because my great great great grandparents immigrated to this island.

Darwin: Now, as it seems we are stuck on this island together, and it appears that we are most alone at this point in time, we must try to find a way to survive. We can use our intellects and the bodies that God has willingly given us to try and combat You, good sirs and ma'am, must be able to find food and shelter to survive, or we, errrr, may not be able to continue our distinct human race on this isolated island.

Whitman: Why does it matter Daniel? Just enjoy life as it is now, that question is not important. And Charles, we are never alone, we always have nature as our company. Why don't we meditate first? Perhaps we will find the answers there? And then we proceed to working on your suggestion Charles.

Dennett: Charlie, I like where your mind is, but say, you never did answer my question. How do you think we got here?

Darwin: I am not sure, to tell the truth. But it seems that we have somehow spontaneously all arrived at a single location together. Am I right in this assumption?

Dennett: Indeed, that seems to be the case, though our origins hitherto seem rather obscured from us. Might you offer any conjecture as to our genesis to this strange place?

Darwin: Origins? You said, Origins? Hmmmmmm.... *writes in notebook and looks very thoughtful* Perhaps our lives began at a certain point, a point at which we developed the notions to all think in some way that transported us to this invariable location.

Whitman: (not really paying attention) Oh this place is so beautiful.... And we are so beautiful. This world is so beautiful....

Husvedt: Clearly not, charles. we are the products of the political, social, and economic structures that informed the experiences of our ancestors.

Dennett: Why, Siri, that just seems ridiculous! One might as well say that a giant apparatus descended from the sky and supplanted us here! Your explanation is clearly unsupported and insupportable. However, Charlie here is really getting at something with his speculation on Origins... he is quite grounded in something firm and real, it seems.

Husvedt: there is no beauty in being stuck, as it seems we are gentlemen...

Whitman: Oh come on Siri! Being stuck is a part of life! Life is wonderful and so is the art of being stuck. It only gives us something new to discover about this world and ourselves.

Darwin: Some would even venture to say that my ideas are dangerous!

Dennett: Oh Charlie, your ideas are dangerously delicious. It really is a shame that members of the same gender of our species cannot procreate... perhaps we should evolve to be able to do so. However, in the absence of that capability, I sincerely worry for the fate of our species given that Siri is the only capable vessel for our progeny - I, for one, abstain from this duty

Husvedt: and why do you feel compelled to abstain, daniel? why do you think you need this wedge between us?

Darwin: *coughs* I hope that the most successful of our male representations would be able to further on our species, but there are times when it certainly seems like lady luck decided for us. Hmmmmmmm... I do not feel that I am compelled to abstain, I would rather think about this for a while.

Whitman: There is no wedge. We are all connected in nature's harmony. Right Daniel and Charles?

Dennett: Well, yes, conceptually. I would not, however, desire to merge with Siri. But moving on, instead of focusing on what I will not do, we do need to address just what we are going to do while we are here, and how we will get ourselves out of here (if escape is indeed our goal)

Darwin: Well, there could be a wedge. Again, I am not really sure. What do you think about our being here and how to possibly get back? I was having a nice cup of tea that I would like to get back to.

Whitman: Why should we escape? If this is where we were brought then let us create our world here! We can live in harmony and bask in the glory of a Utopian society. Mother nature would be so proud!

Husvedt: Of course escape is our goal! and the way to do that is to look to our past. Now, who dreamt of what last night?

Whitman: I had tea with the trees and leaves from my backyard. We talked about our day and discovering our multitudes, it was lovely. But can I ask how that relates to our escape Siri?

Husvedt: walt, we may only move forward by looking to the past. and it is only in dreams that we may truly see our pasts...

Darwin: The past is certainly how we are formed to be created today. The origins of life have changed and manipulated themselves to what we and every other species is today. Although I think you're talking about our most recent past, Siri.

Whitman: And by looking into our unconsious?! Brilliant! More multitudes to be uncovered!

Dennett: Well, I for one would not like to remain here - perhaps I would spend some more time with Darwin another time, but these other two are a bit much to digest. Whitman, this creator idea you talk about is deeply problematic.

Darwin: Man selects only for his own good; Nature only for that of the being which she tends.

Whitman: I appreciate the wonders of the universe. What exactly is problematic Mr. Dennett?

Dennett: Well, I don't much want to belabor it now, but it is a fantastical idea that comes out of nowhere. Charlie has a much better account, methinks

Whitman: Out of nowhere sir? It isn't out of nowhere, its from within us. Just because you cannot see it with your "crane" doesn't mean that it does not exist.

Husvedt: Listen, guys. I want to get out of here. This is bringing up traumatic memories of tv dinners and my parents' bickering. So, in the interest of moving on, i think we should all share about our familial ancestors and the past.

Darwin: Crane, what crane??? I've only seen a few skyhooks fluttering about.

Whitman: Oh dear, he sees skyhooks... Who's the crazy one now?

Dennett: But soft! I've found here a treasure chest! I am opening it presently, and there is a scroll of sorts inside. Let us see what this says forthwith..."You are all here marooned on the island of Dalke and Grobstein. You have been convened for the purposes of educating the youth of Haverford and Brynmawr Colleges on Science, Literature, and the Meaning of Life. You are to separately write texts that will be used in service of this end, and when you are done you will reconvene with all of your ideas to present a convergent summary of your disparate ideas to show the youth what you have learned." I daresay, we may be here for a reason after all!

Husvedt: sigh. i'm so lonely.

Whitman: No one is lonely Siri. We are all in this together! Me, you, them, and everything around us!

Darwin: Yes, we are all together!This scroll is most interesting, let us go off on our own ways now and explore this island.

Whitman: Siri and I will go in one direction and Charles and Daniel in another....perhaps we may meet again?

Husvedt: of course we will, history is doomed to repeat itself--we will meet in our dreams!

Dennett: We will converge and diverge again and again without rhyme or reason... but I for one will enjoy the ride, and keep comforting stories in mind along the way.

Darwin: What crazy creatures we are who have evolved. See you soon, my most interesting island friends!


The End

This was our script that emerged spontaneously and simultaneously over the internet through Google docs.