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Reading the DSD Guidelines: Handbook for Parents, I couldn't help but feel absolutely terrible. While I think it's fantastic that there are parental books for difficult situations, some of the emotions described that parents might feel were a bit horrifying. "Shock, disbelief, anxiousness, fear, curiosity, embarrassment, confusion, and helplessness" are reasonable for parents who have discovered that their children have, say, a terminal disease, but to have an intersex condition... I think it says something terrible about today's society, that parents would be so devastated to learn that their child doesn't fit in as nicely into these petty categories like sex/gender.

I was delighted by Hida's statement that "she never felt pressure to choose a gender." With our current sociological state, it's nearly impossible to fit perfectly into a single gender. This causes so many problems, especially for those like Hida who don't feel particularly drawn to either gender. As you've mentioned, gender encompasses so much of what we learn, including genitalia. But does it have to be that way? Is gender included in lessons about the anatomy of the liver? The fact that "vagina" doesn't always equal "girl," etc, shows that to teach it like that is an antiquated perspective. Gender isn't necessary to develop; in some cases, it's only a hindrence. For example, in the short story X: A Fabulous Child's Story, a child is raised with no gender, and receives hatred not from classmates, but from adults who believe that gender is essential. Yes, this is only fiction, but it provides a genderless environment where, believe it or not, everyone is happy in the end. While I recognize that reaching this point is extremely difficult, given our current society, I maintain that living without gender can provide advantages. Without any expectations of how you should act or what you should like, there is no longer the need to fill a role determined at birth, only the freedom to be oneself and to be happy doing so.

(By the way, if you have the time, that really is an amazing, amazing short story. One of my favourites. :D)

I also have a few questions for Katie:

1. What is your opinion on doctors determining the sex(/gender) of a baby, for whom that might not be so clear? Should doctors still try to make a determination, or not bother? Do you think, in the future, that children will be able to survive socially without an attachment to a gender, or even as assigned to a third (or fourth or fifth....) gender?

2. In your opinion, what is the relationship between being intersex and being transgender? Do you think there is any connection at all?

3. How have your parents and other family members dealt with your DSD or your career choices?

Thank you!