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so the writing exercise we did really worked for me. in the sense that in the begining i had no idea what to write. the questions were just statements roaming around my head not particularily articulating themselves in any manner. so i had to push myself, and when i did, i seemed to succeed a little.

this is what i took home and have been thinking over thanksgiving break:

- what does inherently mean?

- how do we push past what we're 'inherently' made of? can we? do we need to?

- does 'inherently' come into play if we exercise free will? do we have free will?

- what is the point of having free will?

and thats whats stayed on my mind. what is the point of having free will. if we cant exercise it. if we remain boxed in, whats the point of knowing we can have free will.

and even if we decide to exercise it, our actions are always going to be subject to other peoples opinions and thoughts and perceptions. theyre going to box us in anyway. so where does free will get us?

and then there was the question of whether it was a liberating expression of free choice and sexual independence. which got me thinking about whether it was liberating at all. and for whom. was it for the girls performing, for the people watching or even for us as we study it?

and what were they expressing anyway? their sexuality? because that didnt seem to be the case. their bodies? maybe. or maybe just their independence and courage. maybe.

and what if you dont get into it by choice. can the freedom of expression still liberate you from the labour? is it a controlled liberation? does the liberation wash over the disgust? is there disgust? does their have to be?

can you 'sell' your body and still be in control? why do you need to be? and who is in control - the girl, the man watching, or people like us, sitting comfortably at home reading statistics and behaving like we understand.