I have chosen the four stepping-stones near the willow tree overlooking the duck pond as my scape. I feel close to the water here. It’s peaceful, tucked away as it’s own little corner of the world. It’s my secret hiding spot. I remember when I was a little girl; I had at least half a dozen secret hiding spots in my house. My favorite was the back of my mom’s closet—silk skirts would tickle my legs as I tried to balance on top of black stilettos. It was a place where I felt a sense of ownership, because no one else knew about it.
On these four stepping-stones, I feel grounded. It reminds me of hiding at the back of my mom’s closet; but this time, it I felt like I was just borrowing the space for a while. It is this place that I come to when I’m feeling lost and vulnerable, when I’m crying about the boy who started the fire, and when the smoke keeps calling me back. It is this place I come to let go of all the pain I want to heal. I think it’s because it’s so close to the water. That’s why I’ve always loved the ocean. The movement of water catches and tugs at my thoughts and ambitions, and really forces me to be in the moment. Often in nature I find that my mind wanders, but here, near the water, I feel, finally, content.
**look for the red star on the Haverford College map!