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Persistence's picture

There was something soothing about how slow and fast the snow fell from the sky and the way it filled the dark trees around me. I turned white from head to toes by the time I reached what I thought was the center of the labyrinth. The carpet of snow beneath my feet could not hide the path from me, I knew it all too well. The snow continued to fall soundlessly as white flakes creeped into the opening of my boots. Despite how soothing the way the snow slowed everything down and how fluffy the ground beneath me felt, I couldn’t grasp why I didn’t like it as much as liked it last year. I felt like a little girl every time it snowed. I had always looked forward to the snow angels, the snowball fights, and the shoveling. I guess I missed the way the snow brought people together. Sadly, the excitement around snow ceases as we get older. I guess I got older last year.

The snow lifted in the wind around me as I kept asking myself why I felt so warm outside. I couldn't make sense of why my room felt colder.  Why was I warmer outside than inside? Why did it suddenly feel like a warm winter? I'm usually warm when I'm happy. Maybe I felt happier outside in the snow. Maybe? 


Anne Dalke's picture

It seems as though your reports of your visits to your site, so far, have all been accounts of mood states, often complex-and-contradictory ones: this week not liking the snow (as much as last year), and yet feeling happier (outside than inside); last week, "warm and cold at the same time"; the week before, experiencing the wind as both "beautifully hitting" you, and as terribly cold. The first week of this project, you reported selecting the labyrinth as your site "because there is one in you," but your reports so far have seemed more those of a maze than a labyrinth (in terms of the contrast you set out yourself, in that first post: puzzling twists and turns, vs. "only one path").

Also? would you tag all these posts as site sits? Your doing so will help make the path of tracing them easier for me (and eventually, for you, too!) Thanks!

only has one path.
Persistence's picture

Hi Anne,

I noticed that about myself too. I think I'm becoming an emotional roller-coaster, or maybe I have already became one. Sometimes my emotions get in the way of how I interact with my site. I really don't know how to suppress them and let my senses feel what I need to feel at my site. I feel all my emotions instead. My emotions become my senses and I think it interferes with how I interact with it. Often times I would forget about the world around me because I keep getting stuck in the world inside my head.