September 9, 2016 - 16:59
Vivian O’Bannon
Emily Balch Seminar: Changing Our Story
September 9, 2016
Understanding My Privileges and Lack Thereof
To understand privilege, one must understand the lack thereof. Because “my sexuality is not a part of my physical identity, and people are often discriminated against for their appearance” (O’Bannon 2), I am able to appreciate the privileges within my specific tribulation. I constantly remind myself that – although people like me are converted, massacred, imprisoned, hated – at least I can hide behind my appearance. At least sexuality is internal. At least I can suppress my love. At least I am not gay and fill-in-the-blank.
Ursula Le Guin epitomizes (and villainizes) this nuanced idea about privilege in her short story The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas. The people of Omelas live their life without remorse. They have all accepted the deliberate suffering of one for the constant happiness of all. If Omelas was truly perfect, everyone would be happy - but this concept is a catch 22. For everyone to be happy, no one can want more, no one can complain, no one can feel sorry for themselves. Everyone must understand their privilege, but the only way to fully appreciate, understand, and be grateful for what you have is to see what someone else does not. You must constantly be aware that someone suffers and feels more pain, that your life is and will always be infinitely better than that one person’s life. The people of Omelas understand that one person’s suffering is necessary; risking “all the goodness and grace of every life in Omelas for that single, small improvement” (Le Guin 4) would result in pity for all people instead of pity for just one.
Although this story is fictional, Le Guin presents a very interesting idea about privilege. The passage incites many different trains of thought: on one hand, she implies that full appreciation of privilege is only possible if you can imagine what it is like to have nothing. On the other hand, she implies that you should learn to appreciate your life and privileges without comparing yourself to others. It is okay to feel bad, to want more, to occasionally complain about your life, no matter your privileges. Because your problems are subjective to your life, not his or hers or theirs or mine. I have learned that it is okay to feel bad for myself, especially because I am discriminated against. Maybe not as much in the United States as in another less-developed country, but schools continue to fire teachers for their sexuality. People are refused jobs. LGBT+ people are bullied, harassed, and killed regularly. There are serious side-effects of my life, and I am allowed to be discouraged at times. I allow myself to feel this pain because I understand my privileges. I am also aware of what other people do not have, and what other people struggle with in their lives. Because I do not know everyone’s backgrounds, “I learned that anyone can be a victim of some kind of discrimination”. It is important that I avoid “assuming that someone has an easy life because of their physical appearance (race, gender)” (O’Bannon 3).
Throughout my life, I have faced and dealt with many issues. I came out as gay when I was 14 years old, thus accepting the fact that I am a sexual minority shunned by many religions and governments. Although I face these realities every day, I demonstrate strength by remaining true to myself. I could choose to hide my sexuality and repress these feelings, I could pretend to fall in love with a man and pursue the conventional lifestyle preached by most societies. But I do not. My strength comes from my ability to welcome the backlash, because I would rather fight for love than shut myself down when I am castigated by others. Just like the young people in Omelas, I will walk away from a happy, calm, and seemingly beautiful life. The perfection in Omelas is based upon silence and submission, but I will not bask in a utopian façade; I cannot appreciate a privilege that I know to be false.