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Writing/Second Guessing

RainQueen's picture

I've always been someone who writes.  I started doing so when I was young and continue this habit especially when I'm nervous or stressed. It's become a safe thing to do: to sit and reflect. That being said, I never progress from that point: I'm afraid to share what I write with others. Is this a problem, or is writing simply for my own healing? I feel that it is, but I'm stopping part of the process by being unable to share. It's like I have something helpful to myself that I know could also help others. 

I wonder where the sweet spot of this is: why is my private  writing something I'm proud of and love while academic writing to me feels "flat?" I feel that the writing I produce for pleasure feels more real; it jumps off the page with vivid details, while the writing I compose professionally is boring. I even get this critique on papers sometimes. But I don't know how to bring the independent spirit of my writing into the world of academia. Is there even a place for it?