February 27, 2017 - 02:26
It's hard to get in the mindset of opperating as part of a "collective;" part of me wants to fight the label and take issue with being placed into one big grouping. I guess this is simply part of human nature- no one wants to be uninteresting or unimportant, and unfortunatly we often equate this with not standing out. It's not that I feel I'm not contributing; in fact I know and feel deeply that anything that contributes to a cause is important. And I am progressing; I am increasingly trusted within BTB and am able to help more and more as time goes on. However, is just being there and doing what is needed enough? Is it as important a contribution as the ones made by those working at the other placements?
I feel that in many ways, this discomfort is good. It means that I'm forcing myself out of my comfort zone. Stagnating, in any way, is always detrimental. Just because thinking as a group is new to me doesn't mean that it's bad. My contributions, despite them being for a group, are still my ideas. They strengthen the organization, like bricks in a stone wall. Without each brick, the structure would colapse. But no one talks about the individual bricks (even if they know how important each is); instead you praise a sturdy, well built home.