Sexual Education Curriculum for the Locsin Family * This curriculum is based on the first essay about the Locsin Family but is not involving my ongoing relationship (having a bf) as an adolescent with their knowledge. This is a Sexual Education curriculum created for The Locsin family, the subsexual group I chose as an example. It is a curriculum that is explored through a Map of Events explained thoroughly in its' dynamics. Here is an overview of the Locsin family: conservative, Catholic (very religious), loving and not open about sex, it is nonexistent in their language. "Sex is a vehicle for a variety of feelings and needs" (Weeks, 65) Thus, the need for a sexual education curriculum has been made for this family. Goal: My goal is to construct a way of communicating sex in the Locsin family. Thus, creating this language will draw the family and it's members closer and will then lead to open discussions on sex. Dynamics: I propose to devise a sexual education curriculum through a "Map of Events". This plan will clearly explain each step in the procedure to generate a sexual language in a family setting. Ten days have been allotted to perform this curriculum. Each day has its' own particular theme and language used. The language that will be used will change throughout the process. Thus, the language in the beginning will be more generalized and indirect. This will involve events such as communicating sex for the first time with parents and siblings, trying to make it a dinner table topic and the whole aspect of dating the opposite sex. Since most of the conversation will be with parents, it will be non-academic and non-slang as opposed to language used with a more familiar sex group. As time progresses, communication will be more specific in language and opinionated. These events will include the rules of the game in dating, having a steady boyfriend and accepting the issue of sex in a conversation played in the household. The illustrated map has a word that represents each day. This will give the reader a sense of how the curriculum progresses in terms of emotional and physical factors. It is also set up in such a way that there will be support groups that the members of the family can turn to in case they do not feel that they want to move on from the day or step they are in. There will be four support groups: my auntie Cindy, my grandmother, a group of my friends and my uncle June. Remember, this curriculum has been made in such a way that each event has been accepted by the members. However, hypothetically I will add some instances where some of the members do not comply with the events and I will also give input in what "they might say or do". These will be cases when the support group will be of good use to the members. DAY 1 Dating · Talking to mom about dating in Starbucks I will plan for my mom and I to go out for coffee on a nice Sunday afternoon. We will have our occasional girl talk, the conversation mainly consisting of all my recent crushes. I will bring up the idea of whether I am allowed to date. I would want to hear her reaction to this issue. She might be hesitant to answer the question and just change the subject all together or she might be accepting and elaborate on what I mean by "a date". In the case where she doesn't want to talk about it and feels uneasy, she can always turn to one of the support groups for their opinions. In this situation, she would probably turn to my auntie Cindy, her sister for some advice. The reason why I chose to begin this process by conversing with my mother first is because I feel closest to her and I feel that she understands me most. As Kahn states "Mothers appear to take more responsibility for sexual communication with children than do fathers" (Kahn, 287). DAY 2 Dating ·Joining my siblings watch some TV and then asking if they want to have a snack after. I plan to have a conversation about dating with my siblings after watching TV, because it is this time when they are relaxed and will be more than willing to talk. Talking over a snack is a way of being open and welcoming new subjects for conversation. I will bring up the subject of dating with my brother first since he is the eldest and he is very protective of me and my sister. He might not be open to the idea and will just tell me that it isn't going to happen soon or he might joke around asking me if there is someone I like but at the same time tell me that he doesn't like the idea of me dating. My sister on the other hand might nod and be like why are you asking this or she will be like okay you like Ralph but you cannot date him yet. The language here would be casual and at the same time more general and indirect. I chose them next to talk about dating because they don't take it seriously and probably understand more where I am coming from considering the fact that we are around the same age range. DAY 3 Dating ·Talk with dad during a Monopoly game. I am the baby of the family and with the close relationship I have with my father, dating was one issue we never talked about and one which I wish he did talk about. "As a child matures, a parent should readjust his way of relating to the child to foster growth" (Graybosch, 314). It has never been easy for me to bring this topic up, so during this conversation I would use very general language and make sure that he understands what I am trying to say. I plan to ask him what he thinks of the idea of me being involved in a relationship with a boy and if he will allow this. My father would either be appalled with what I am talking about and just give me the "I don't want to talk about it" look or he might react in such a way that is telling me that he realizes that I am not a kid anymore. I chose to discuss this with my father last because I wouldn't know any way to approach this subject by telling him first. I feel that by letting him know last, I would have had enough practice in talking about it already. DAY 4 Dating and SEX ·Discussion of dating and sex over dinner A Friday evening dinner would be a good time to have an open discussion on dating and by this time, everyone should be prepared for this because of the pep talk I gave each member during the past three days. I would then ask my parents if dating is allowed (this would be in front of everyone) and what would be an appropriate time for me to date. I would also bring up the subject of SEX just because we never talked about it and since I am of age to date I would want to know their opinions of SEX. I would be speaking in very indirect terms and trying to let them know what I was feeling and thinking. I would want them to understand my position and take it as it is. At this point, my mother would probably tell me that SEX is out of the question and give her reasons, but on the other hand she might tell me that she is not approving of letting me have sex at this age, but if I do just to be safe and with someone who I love. My father and siblings would probably not say a word and my mother would handle all the talking. At this point, my siblings would probably turn to a support group and most likely it would be my friends. This is because they would probably be thinking that I am sexually active and would like to know who this person is. DAY 5 Being honest with Dad · Library visit At this time, I plan to visit my dad in his library and talk to him. I would tell him that I have been dating someone. My dad not knowing what to do would say would be silent for a moment. He then would either say that he was glad that I was being honest with him and then ask me some questions or tell me that he would talk to my mom about it. The reason why I chose to tell my father about this relationship was because in our family system, the father is head of the household and I felt that telling him first would show my utmost respect. DAY 6 Rules of the dating game ·One long afternoon By this time, language should be more direct and the other members should be initiating the conversation, my parents in particular. I would be doing my homework and my mother would tell me that she knows all about it and say that there is nothing she can do about the situation. She would probably tell me that I am of age to make my own decisions and she is not too happy about it or she would tell me that she wants to meet him. On the other hand, my father would tell me that he wants to invite the guy for dinner. In this event, my parents would be throwing questions back and forth such as where he's from, how did I meet him, how long has it been. In this occasion, my mother might consult a support group which would be my grandmother this time. She would ask my grandmother how she would go about discussing issues such as intimate relationships. At this time my siblings would also know about this and just leave the talking to my parents since they don't feel that they are in the position to get involved with my personal life. DAY 7 Meet the Parents ·Boy+Girl This would be the day I would introduce my parents to the guy I am dating. The dinner would be a casual one in my house and not one of those Filipino dinners which the extended family attends, just one with my immediate family. My parents would ask him questions and want to get to know him a little bit better. Since a new addition to the group has been added, I think that the language will be back to being general and indirect. Most of the time, my sister would be silent and my brother on the other hand would be inquisitive and would not stop asking him questions. DAY 8 Let's talk about Love ""Being able to communicate, listen, negotiate, ask for and identify sources of help and advice, are useful life-skills and can be applied in terms of sexual relationships" (Forrest, 1) · Me and my guy After having a very tiring and eventful night, my parents would want to have a talk with me about my relationship with the guy. During this time, the language will be more specific and direct regarding the fact that they have already met him and this is a conversation involving only me and my parents. I would ask them what they thought of him and to give me some feedback on how the evening went. My mother would probably comment on saying how he is nice and say that if it is serious, I should wait awhile before I get intimate with him because it is only natural to get to know the person better. My father on the other hand might be accepting of this developing relationship between me and the guy and warn me to be cautious of what I am getting myself into because he doesn't want me to get hurt. The conversation would end in a silent note and I would just be listening the whole time and thinking. DAY 9 Reflections · Reflecting internally Day 9 is planned to be a day of reflection for each of the family members. These past days have been very overwhelming and it is time for each member to have his/her time to reflect and think about the situation at hand. "That is the silence of contemplation; that is the silence where people get in touch with themselves; that is the silence of meditation and worship. And what makes this distinct is that it is a silence that is an enabling condition, that opens up the possibility of unprogrammed, unplanned and unprogrammable happenings" (Franklin, 1). DAY 10 Acceptance · Sex?!?! By this time, my parents should be more open to the discussion of sex and tell me how if dating is going to be permitted and what I have to follow if I am allowed to date. Language would be very casual and specific. I also would be able to give my opinion to whatever they have to say about my relationship with my guy. My parents would probably let me date if they like the guy and how he presented himself to my family at the dinner. "By being open to discussions on a variety of topics, including sex, the line of communication between you and your child is established"(Feightner,1). My mother would let me date him but sex would still be out of the question but she would be willing to talk about it. My father would probably comply with my mothers'decision, considering the fact that they trust me, this would make dating alright with them. However, with sex, yes they would probably be more open with the issue but would prefer me to abstain. There could also be a possibility where both my parents would not let me date yet and not accept the fact that sex has been brought into family discussion. Conclusion: Having been through ten days of this curriculum should at least help develop sexual discussion in the Locsin family. The discussions that occurred in these ten days were used as tools to unravel the nonexistent language of sex in the household. Even though sex would take time in being an open discussion, this curriculum is a start for sex to be discussed seriously and for the family to realize that it is the decision of any member to make in these types of instances such as dating and sex. This not only brings the family together but also makes them understand each other better. BIBLIOGRAPHY Feightner, Susan. "The Birds, the Bees, and You". Online: . Visited (Sept. 28, 2002) Forrest, Simon. "Sex Education that Works". Online: Visited (Sept. 28, 2002) Franklin, Ursula. "Silence and the Notion of the Commons". Online: Visited (Sept. 28,2002) Irvine, Janice. Sexual Cultures and the Construction of Adolescent Identities. Philadelphia: Temple University Press, 1994. pg. 287. Stewart, Robert. Philosophical Perspectives on Sex&Love. "Parents, Children, and Friendship by Anthony Graybosch".New York: Oxford Press, 1995. pg. 314 Weeks, Jeffrey. Sexuality. London: Tavistock Publications, 1986. pg.65.

| Forums | Serendip Home |

Send us your comments at Serendip

© by Serendip 1994- - Last Modified: Wednesday, 02-May-2018 10:51:33 CDT