English 212
2002 First Paper
On Serendip

Before Introduction
Metaphysical mutations - that is to say radical, global transformations in the values to which the majority subscribes - are rare in the history of humanity. Once a metaphysical mutation has arisen, it tends to move inexorably toward its logical conclusion. Heedlessly, it sweeps away economic and political systems, aesthetic judgments and social hierarchies. No human agency can halt its progress - nothing except another metaphysical mutation.
Michel Houellebecq, The Elementary Particles

After nearly a decade of teaching Russian to American students, I have just recently come to realize that sexuality has been always avoided in our textbooks, which is rather ironic given that most FL textbooks have as their underlying plot a juicy love story with an indigenous woman falling for (or should I say conquered by) an American man, fearless explorer of the unknown and exotic. What should I ascribe my sudden awakening to? My personal growth or rather a common sentiment shared by many especially those on the Gerry Springer show. At any rate, it seems that sexuality has finally made it not only to the notoriously corrupted TV, but also to an innocent college classroom. Celebrating this liberation I am turning to the most delicious literary production - personal ads, which for years I would never admit familiarity with. Thank you, feminism and welcome corruption and blasphemy!

Introduction (this is damn boring)
In this paper I examine personal ads posted on the bilingual Internet site - www.russianny.com -designed for the Russians residing in the U.S. For now, I limit my study to the twenty ads by heterosexual individuals1, aged from 18 to 25 years old. The ads were randomly selected and split equally between female and male subjects. The goal of this study is to identify the major discourses used by the chosen population and the origins of these discourses, whether they belong to the American or Russian culture. The attempt is made at describing the interplay of the two languages in constructing sexual identity by the bilingual subjects.

The textual and discourse analysis has been guided by the following questions:
1) What nicknames, if any, the man and woman chose for themselves? Is there any preference for Russian or English nicknames?
2) While constructing the model of the sought relationship what do the participants call: a) themselves; b) the other; and c) their future relationship? How are the two languages used?
3) How do the participants describe themselves:
a) what are the most frequent grammatical forms used (adjectives, verbs, nouns);
b) what are the preferable semantic clusters for describing self and the other?
c) What is being mentioned first personality features of physical characteristics?
4) What is being emphasized? And what words are being used for this purpose?
5) What are the most popular discourses?
6) Is there a match between female and male ads?

I realize that the embarking on this project can be a crude indulgence of my long suppressed voyeurism, however I can assure my critical readers that at this point I am equipped enough to present any perversion as a communal good. Like with the proposed project, I can argue that knowledge of the linguistically constructed sexuality by the Russian-English bilinguals serves multiple goals: it informs FL teaching, it interprets socialization patterns, values and attitudes of the visible social group within American culture, assists articulation of social policy with regard to sexuality, facilitates cross-cultural communication and so on. But let's be real, I am just having fun.

Findings and Discussion
In this paper I will report only the most salient features distinguishing linguistic production of the chosen by-lingual population.

Nicknames2
The female participants tend to use Russian nicknames when the male participants seem to stick to the English ones. In their nicknames, most women try to convey cute, tame femininity choosing words morphologically marked as diminutives with additional meaning of endearment. The women's preference of the Russian language is understandable, given that English does not provide similar morphological device. The male nicknames seem to be semantically united by the notion of uniqueness (use of the definite article, words like 'one'). Both men and women seem to resort to the archetype common for both Russian and American cultures: beautiful, weak woman and strong man. Interestingly, in the analyzed ads female beauty is being constructed less absolute, so to say, and more 'popular': it is not 'beauty' but rather 'cuteness'.

Categorization3
In reconstructing the cultural model of sexuality, shared by the English-Russian bilinguals, the way the participants call themselves, the other and the sought relationship reveals the norms they adhere to. The female participants exhibit more diversity in naming themselves and the other, while stopping short when it comes to defining the relationship: they all vote for 'romance', 'true love' and 'ever lasting relationship'. It is worthy noting that more women than men do not name their relationship at all. The righteous reader might ask: 'Do the hell they know what they want?' Well, it is a tough question, my fellow righteous reader. You know, in the Russian culture, even nowadays, it is typical to leave up to the/a man all important decisions, at least overtly. If you do not trust me, listen to what this young woman has to say: 'Now, all is up to you'. Not dwelling on the abundantly stereotypical nominalization, briefly note that it is only men who dare to call their sought relationship "oral sex", "intimate encounters", "short meetings" (Russ), "sexual diversity"(Russ). And by the way, women, be ware: when Russian men call you "woman", it is not a term of respect, because it is normally followed by the invitation to perform "oral sex" or engage in "diverse sex" or "short intimate encounters". For more fun, look at the Table 5 summarizing who with whom does what.

Emphasis
In short, men are braggers. While only one of the female participants came up with a rather modest emphasis of her sexual attractiveness: "my looks and sex appeal usually (not always, my comment) attract most guys", nearly every man states that he is "a very cute", "extremely modest", "very kind", "very positive", "very funny", "with the longest nose", "mastered the latest slang" etc. Having reminded women about their undeniable superiority, men then drop condescendingly: "No need to kneel down in amazement at my articulation and rich background. Rather get up and introduce yourself". Are these men dumb? Not necessarily, in most cases they simply comply with cultural norms that require them to be aggressive and self-assertive, otherwise they "do not belong to their real masculine sex"(Russ), as one of the women said. Are the women modest? Not at all. They simply employ one of the cultural stereotypes that claims modesty the most desirable women's virtue". "The best adornment for a woman is modesty and a transparent dress", as E. Schwartz ironically summarizes it in his famous tale Dragon. And so does one of the participating women, although seriously: "I am not gonna describe how good I am, because it is not for me to decide those things".

Probably, the major problem that might arise in cross-cultural communication is distinguishing between a sincere confession and learned cliché. Most of our knowledge has never been challenged by our consciousness, as it has been acquired in the very early age as unquestionable maxim. Language is a depository of this knowledge and it takes a focused effort to mean what you mean and to know what you mean, otherwise we are all plagiarists at best and liars at worst. Gosh, it is getting boring. Sorry for the detour.

Major Discourses
There are five major discourses the male participants are most attracted to:
1) discourse of abundance:
"I am a realization of all dreams of the beautiful sex" (Russ)
"Intelligent & independent, kind & fun to be with, tall & fit. Like having fun, reading, interesting company, long walks, theaters, gardens, museums, the beach, travel, comfy lounges and much, much more. Like even ice but mainly in the drinks".
2) discourse of uniqueness:
"the one", "the love of your life", "I have recently realized that I would have to do something DRASTIC to get your attention, while weeding out all the CRAZIES, LOSERS, and DUM-DUMS who are keeping us from meeting each other" (I preserve the authors' style).
3) discourse of competition (see above about weeding out the rivals);
4) the beginning:
"e-mail me and we'll figure out what to do next"
"I know this can be a beginning of something wonderful for both of us"
5) archetype:
The self identification as "he" (Russ), "the Man" (Eng) are salient examples of this type of discourse.
6) discourse of the bold advertisement, even in terms of graphic:
"Dear Reader, "I have some SHOCKING news for you. You may be just DAYS away from meeting THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE."I have STILL MORE shocking news for you. Allow me a minute to explain. This is not a pitch for a dating service, it's not even a pitch for an irresistible love potion, or a psychic astrological-past life love chart. "So, just what the hack IS this a pitch for them? "Quite simply, dear reader, this is a pitch for ME!"
When one turns to the women's stories, she gets really puzzled how these two sexes, speaking so different languages, can ever get along. What the men call the beginning, the women see as the end, what for men is yet to be seen and figured out is clear and final for women (for those who still do not get it, it is 'romance' and 'ever lasting relationship'). Many women resort to the fairytale discourse inviting men to win them by solving various tasks: "I will only tell my life to someone who wins my attention", "the princess Never-Laugh seeks her prince who will make her laugh". Not surprisingly, the fairytale language is Russian: it is the participants' childhood language, when they read or were read to those fairytales. Although the fairytale discourse can be compared to the discourse of archetype used by the male participants, it still has important differences. For one, while the fairytale emphasizes uniqueness, the archetype discourse accentuates universality. Another popular discourse among the female participants is one of biographical account, which stands in opposition to the men's "advertisement buzz'. It is not catchy, as it follows chronology rather than importance: "my name is Viktoria, I came from Ukraine, I have been in the U.S. for 9 years, I'm a college student, my major is veterinary..."(Russ)

Appendix

Table 1. Nicknames used by the English-Russian Bi-linguals.

English
Russian

Women

e-contact
miss n.
girl 01
sweetie
unforgettable

Kiska (pussy cat)
Malysh (baby)
Milashka (cutie)
Nesmeiana (the one who never laugh)
Neznakomka (stranger)
Partizanka (partisan)

Men
bad boy
dreamboy
ibex
spark
the one
the real phunk
tiz man
z
bez (without)
eskulap (doctor)
on (he)

Table 2. What They Call Themselves

English
Russian

Women

I (4)
Girl (3):
-Jew
-Special
-Picky
Person (3)
Lady (2)
Female (1)
NY citizen (1)

Brunetki (1) brunettes
Glavny priz(1) Major trophy
Ja (1) I
Ljudi(1) people
Lubaschaja zhenschina(1)
loving woman
S ukrainy(1) from Ukraine
Esche nezavoevannaja devushka (1) yet unconquered girl

Men
I (2)
The love of your life(1)
Good looking and young Man(1)

Drug(1) friend
Ja (1) I
Molodoj chelovek (2):
- young fellow
- Zhenaty / young married fellow
Ne urod (1) not a freak
On(1) he
Partner (1) partner
Pomoschnik(1) helper

Table 3. What They Call the Other

English
Russian
No mentioning
Women
Guy (5)
Someone(3):
- serious (2)
- REAL (1)
- Special(1)
man (2):
- of my dreams
- normal
you(2)
Guys (1)
true love (1)
destiny (1)
something close to the man of my dreams (1)
prince (1)
loved one(1)
my perfect balance(1)
great mind &soul(1)

Princ (2):
- na belom kone / prince on the white horse
Tot kto sdelaet menja schastlivoj (1) / someone who will make me happy
Ludi(1) people
Druzja (1) friends
Paren (1) guy
Gentleman (1) gentleman
kto mne prigljanetsa(1) someone whom I like
muzhchina dostojnyj byt i prinadlezhat svoemu nastojaschemu muzhskomu polu (1)
man deserving to belong to his real man's gender
ne durak (1) not a fool

1
Men
Girl(3):
- jewish
- slim jewish
- special
Very Special Lady(1)
You (1)
Jewish sistas
woman (1)
The One (1)
Person(1)
Zhenschina (1) woman
Devushka(3) young woman
Devchonka(1) girl, lassie
Ty(1) informal "you"
Avanturistka(1) adventures woman

Table 4. What They Call the Relationship They are Seeking

English
Russian
No mentioning
Women
true happiness (1)
true love (1)
romance(1)
forever lasting relationship(1)
long term relationships (1)

Chelovecheskie otnoshenia(1) human relation
3
Men
Fun (3)
Not sure what or who I am looking for (1)
intimate encounters(1)
oral sex(1) (both receiving and giving)
something wonderful for both of us(1)

Kratkie vstrechi (1) short meetings
my prosto reshili raznoobrazit polovuju zhizn iz lubvi k iskusstvu (1) we just decided to diverse our sexual life out of appreciation of art

2

Table 5. The Constructed Model: Self -Other - Relationship

Self
Other
Relationship
Women English
Sweetie

Unforgettable

Fun-loving Lady
Special guy

My Perfect balance

Tall guy, someone serious &real/ my prince
.....

My perfect balance

Will change my life forever
Women Russian
Nesmejana, glavnyj priz
[Woman-Never-Laugh, major trophy]

Kiska
[pussy cat]

Neznakomka
[stranger]

Malysh
[little baby]

Viktoria

Esche nezavoevannaja devushka
[yet not conquered girl]

Princ
[prince]

Nice, smart, trustworthy guy

Princ na belom kone (postarshe)
[prince on the white horse, a little bit older than myself]

Man of my dreams or something close to him

Obrazovannyj paren, gentleman
[well-educated guy, gentleman]

Muzhchina dostojnyj bit I prinadlezhat svoemu nastojaschemu muzhskomu polu
[man deserving to belong to his real masculine sex]

Sdelaet menja schastlivoj
[he will make me happy]

Chelovecheskie otnoshenja
[human relationship]

........

..........

............

All up to you
Men English
The love of you life

I

I

Good looking young man

Very cute guy

I
Very special lady

Jewish sistas

Girl

Open minded woman

Cute and intelligent Jewish girl (with a sense of humor)

The one/ slim Jewish girl

Meant for each other

I am not sure what or who I am looking for

To have fun

Intimate encounters, oral sex

...............

beginning of something wonderful for both of us
Men Russian
Zhenatyj molodoj chelovek [young married man]

Ja
[I]

Ja

Tvoj pomoschnik, drug I partner [your helper and friend]

Zhenschina
[woman]

Russkaja krasivaja I intelligentnaja devchonka
[Russian cute and interesting girl]

Ty - avanturistka
[you are an advantures woman]

Kratkie vstrechi i bolshe
[short meetings and more]

tam razberemsa
[we'll figure out what to do next]

raznoobrazit polovuju zhizn
[diverse sexual live]

HOW THEY DESCRIBE SELF

Table 6. Personality Before "Physicality": Personality Treats

English
Russian
Woman
Intelligent(2)
good-natured
fun-loving
unique

VERBS
do not want games

s ukrainy/ from Ukraine
uchus v kollege/ a college student
nezavisimaja/independent
umnaja/smart
krepkaia/strong
VERBS
mogu za sebja postojat/can defend myself
lublju teatry/love theaters
obozhaju zhivotnyh/ love animals

Man
modest:2
nice:1
educated:1
family-orirented:1
like having fun:1
reading:1
sweet1
smart 1
funny 1
dobryj: 1
polozhitelnyj:1
veselyj:1
interesnyj v obschenii:1

Table 7. Personality Before "Physicality": Physical Characteristics

English
Russian
Woman
young
sexy
with all those curves

Simpatichnaja / cute
Man

Simpatichnyj/ cute

Table 8. "Physicality" Before Personality: Physical Characteristics

English
Russian
Woman
looks
sex appeal
picky
attractive
good looking
slim
sexy
22, 5'9", 135

Man
good looking
young
cute
5'8
fit
have dark hair
dark eyes

Table 9. "Physicality" Before Personality: Personality Treats

English
Russian
Woman
Outgoing
Sociable
interesting
Love to meet new people
intelligent

Man
love to travel
have a wide range of itnerestes

HOW THEY DESCRIBE THE OTHER

Table 10. Personality Before "Physicality": Personal Treats

English
Russian
Woman
serious(3)
fun(2)
intelligent(2)
Loyal(2)
Nice(2)
no games in mind(2)
smart(2)
gentleman(1)
knowing his goals in life(1)
kind(1)
loving(1)
REAL(1)
Mature(1)
Trustworthy(1)

interesnyi vnutrenne i vneshne (1)interesting from the inside and outside
s dostatochnym chuvstvom jumora (1) with reasonable sense of humor
intelligentnyj (1) intelligent
gentlemenskij nabor otzyvchivyj(1) gentlemen's kit
lubaschij (1) loving
iskrennij (1) sincere
chestnyi (1) honest
ne zhalejuschij nichego dlja lubaschej ego zhenschiny (1) can give up everythign for the woman who loves him
muzhchina dostojnyj byt i prinadlezhat svoemu nastojaschemu muzhskomu polu(1)the man deserving to belong to his real masculine sex

Man
Jewish(2)
Nice(1)
Intelligent(1)
Nonsmoking(1)
sense of humor(1)

Russkaia(1) Russian
Intelligentnaja (1) intelligent

Table 11. Personality Before "Physicality": Physical Characteristics

English
Russian
Woman
not overwheight(1)

Man
Cute(1)
Slim(1)
Krasivaja(1) beautiful
do 23 let (1) not older than 23y.o.

Table 12. "Physicality" Before Personality: Physical Characteristics.

English
Russian
Woman
Tall(1)

Man
good looking(2)
sexy(2)

Krasivaja(1) beautiful

Table 13. "Physicality" Before Personality: Personal Treats.

English
Russian
Woman

Man
love oral sex both receiving and giving(1)
open minded (1)
with a big heart (1)

Chestnaja(1) honest

1 It is striking that the site serves exclusively strait individuals.
2 Also see Table 1.
3 See tables 2,3,4,5.

1
Sexuality Constructed by
the English-Russian Bi-linguals


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