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In high school and college, community is harder because now the communities we live in are ones we have consciously decided to join. In a larger community, one like Bryn Mawr, we are usually aware of the values and rules which shape the community. A person who is a compulsive liar wouldn't choose to come to Bryn Mawr where honesty and integrity are such emphasized values. Different core values and codes draw different people to different communities. Always, there is one tie that binds everyone in the community together, despite all their many other differences. At Bryn Mawr, I feel that tie is the dedication to the pursuit of challenging oneself through rigorous academia. It's not an usual tie since many institutions of higher learning bond their students through similar ties. But Bryn Mawr is one large community that contains within it, many other smaller ones.
It's easy to join other communities at Bryn Mawr whether they are in the form of culture clubs, sports teams or simply people you live with in a dorm. Each of these communities are ones people choose to join (or at least can choose to opt out of) and form bonds with the people in their communities. In all of these communities, great or small, there are tensions which translate into standards of being. Each community has expectations for the behavior and growth of its members. Bryn Mawr expects people to be intelligent and motivated, honest and ethical. These tensions and standards motivate people to hold themselves up to the ideal and better themselves through the tensions. Sometimes though, instead of being helpful, these tensions can be detrimental.
Sometimes when people don't manage to adapt themselves quickly enough or completely enough into a community, it creates tensions that sometimes end with that community member being ostracized. Often these tensions will begin slowly and create a lot of stress for the individual who isn't acclimating themselves quickly enough or completely enough. Because a community is tied together through similar values or experiences, it expects certain behaviors and values from its members. This is fine except for when the community stresses mutuality at the expense of individuality.
To avoid stressing community members out of wanting to be part of any community, it is important that all the community members approach each other with a certain level of understanding and acceptance. While there are core values and behaviors that are the ties that bind the community together, no member should ever forget that the others are individuals and it is each member's individuality and strength which makes the community what it is.
2. Living in community
Communities bring with them a lot of advantages for the people who live in them. This after all was the original reason for their formation; people banded together to form groups because it offered them better chances for survival. Living in groups meant the division of labour, and thus the most efficient functioning of all the members of the group and the group as a whole. This feature carries over into modern communities. Living in a community such as a city for example, provides one with amenities such as easily available food and clothing from supermarkets and department stores. In return, one contributes to the community by say, providing a dental service, hence serving a useful function. It is thus a process of give and take.
Living in a community thus involves living in close proximity with other people. By experience we know that though human beings always live in proimity with their fellows, they do not necessarily do so in peace. There is always conflict when a group of people get together, thus in order to prevent anarchy and chaos, some sort of regulatory structure is needed. Thus we have rules, norms and regulations. Their intent is to regulate our behaviour within the community that we live in.
The main tension in communities is brought about, ironically, by these very rules and regulations. It is generally impossible for a group of people to always agree on anything, and there are always people within communities who are not in agreement with the rules that have been laid out by others for their intended benefit. If they are sufficiently vocal and confrontational about these feelngs and ideas, conflict is created.This conflict is the main source of tension within communities. For instance, a section of the Bryn Mawr community could disagree with a decision to remove vegan beef from the meal plan. This sort of tension can be useful if kept under control and turned to useful purpose. The pro-vegan beef people could present a logical and clearly stated argument for the continued inclusion of vegan beef and (winning) benefit the community as a whole. Or, if it gets too out of hand, the tension can have destructive effects, for instance the pro-vegan beefers could go on a rampage in the dining hall and destroy everything in sight.The important thing is thus to find a balance between negative and positive tension. A community is usual formed of people with some sort of similarity, but that similarity can be in only one part of their lives. So, for example, at Bryn Mawr all students are interested in the academic experience here, but individually they all very greatly in interests. This difference is the reason that tensions arise. Even when people unite around a common issue, there are always other things that they disagree on. In my personal experience as a leader of the pro-choice club on campus, it has been very interesting to see how the people in the group have so many differing views on other issues. They are certainly united for the right to have an abortion, but in terms of views on life and certainly political views, they have extremely different opinions. They also have different views on how we should accomplish our goals as a club. These differences in opinions are often very helpful. If we all thought the same thing, then nothing new or interesting would ever happen. As a community, we often have different approaches and these are what make life really interesting. Actually, this question is really interesting and timely because we've recently had some extra tension in the Bryn Mawr community. A display sponsored by the BiCo Pro-Life club equated abortion with genocide and the people from the organization made comments that were extremely offensive, including saying that homosexuality is a disease. While I was absolutely horrified at the display and have written in great detail previously on the subject, the effect it has had on tensions within the community have been fascinating to watch. People felt very personally attacked by this display and by the words and the literature of the people that accompanied it. This created some very negative tension between the pro-choice and anti-choice members of the Bryn Mawr community. But it has interestingly really solidified the Pro-Choice community. I have never seen people this worked up about anything in the entire time that I have been at Bryn Mawr. Students offended by the display quickly came up with their own more tasteful counter display. At least 100 students signed a poster in protest. While the display created negative tension directed at one group, it really unified those who were offended. I am unable to draw final conclusions from the events of last week. I am absolutely certain that it helped the cause that I support. I think it is terribly sad that a club on campus chose to bring a group here that would hurt so many people, offend them and degrade them. As a group leader, I have always wanted to avoid too much tension because I didn't want to hurt those who were not part of my group. It appears that tension can actually be quite useful, but I think I still dislike its use in this fashion.
I think it is actually quite easy for members of a community to retain their individuality within a group. Anyone who has a strong sense of self will be able to hold on to this, despite what others tell them to believe. But that is often a challenge for many people. I guess the real issue is if the group supports diversity or not. There are many communities that try and dictate all parts of peoples lives. In those groups, it is hard to behave as an individual, because that behavior will get you kicked out of the group. But communities with a more positive outlook often welcome people and encourage them to be themselves. Any good community should do this.
I would have to say that the most important aspect of my time here has been my involvement in this community. Before I came to Bryn Mawr, even the concept of community was foreign to me. I had heard the word community used, but I didn't really understand it until I got to Bryn Mawr. This is not to say that I had not been a participant in community before college, but Bryn Mawr really stresses the importance of a supportive and engaging community. I have really been able to see this and appreciate it since I began at this school.
At Bryn Maw, we really stress the importance of diversity in the community, both in the classroom and outside of the classroom. This diversity includes not only racial, ethnic, and socioeconomic diversity amongst it students, but also ideological or political diversity. Here we see a valuing of difference. There is an assumption, or perhaps a hope, that in supporting diversity, we will all be able to learn from one another. All of the different perspectives combined will create a community that will be exciting and unique.
But on the other side of this hope for our community is the troubles that come along with diversity. While we would all desire a community which is full of diverse ideas and backgrounds, these differences can often cause a lot of problems. We wish that we could all live comfortably with our differences, but the truth is that many of our differences can cause tension.
One example I can offer is a recent occurrence involving the Pro-Life group. This group, which certainly represents a minority opinion on campus, brought a group here to display some pictures that promote their cause. Many people were offended by the exhibit, and it brought about the problem of self-expression and the tensions that come with diversity. There is a lot of talk about diversity and respect for others. In the case of the Pro-Life group, were we, as a community, respectful to the opinions of some of our students? Further, was the display an example of disrespect for other people's beliefs, or was it just an expression of a minority opinion that many would like to ignore?
I think that the key to solving this puzzle is the importance of dialogue in the community. Dialogue refers to a respectful discussion in which both sides of the argument are trying to understand one another's position, and to come to some sort of resolution which does not necessarily involve one side being right and the other being wrong. I am not sure if this resolution is possible, but I feel that dialogue in community can be incredibly constructed when used correctly.
It is always important for a community to be diverse, but these differences can certainly cause tensions between people. I do believe that people can retain their individuality, no matter how unique, in this community. It seems that a community which seeks diversity must also seek respect and patience. It is through open and engaged dialogue that we sustain these kinds of communities.
Half of the problems most people have would probably not exist if they only kept a positive mental state. A positive mental state is so important for one's mental health, as well as the personal enjoyment of a perpetual good mood. Positive emotions such as love, contentment, pride, interest, and happiness can boost your mental state, and an improved mental state can benefit you in many ways. People in a positive mental state are more mentally alert, more prepared to deal with stress, and more content with life. A mentally healthy state can also improve your ability to think clearly, while those stuck in a negative mental state tend to make bad decisions, or become irritable or impatient.
This concept goes hand in hand with the notion of good and bad stress. Good stress, also known as acute stress, is what gets us going in the morning, or what makes you try your hardest, or what inspires you to try something new. Bad stress, or chronic stress, can weigh down on a person for weeks, months, or years, and there is no relief from the stress when a stressor is removed—you made the deadline, you got the job, or you just completed a huge project—but the stress does not alleviate. Chronic stress causes irritability, decreased ability to think clearly, difficulty focusing, lack of mental/physical energy, and it also can provoke negative thinking. So, chronic stress can even decrease your mental health by invoking a constant negative mental state! This has great potential to become a cycle, and people may feel trapped and hopeless without realizing that usually a minor lifestyle change can let them out of their negative circuit.
Balancing your life is important to maintain a positive mental state, because too much stress can bring you down. Not enough stress can also be bad, because without at least some acute stress, you may tend to lose motivation and laziness can ensue. Balancing life, or more clearly, balancing work and play, not only means not overworking yourself, but it also means making sure you are adequately challenged. A well balanced life that challenges you and reaffirms your self-confidence while still allowing time to relax is conducive to maintaining a positive mental state.
A student body under the pressure of rigorous academics and high expectations is predisposed to the scourge of chronic stress. But people come to Bryn Mawr to be challenged, their thirst for knowledge only vaguely satisfied at the cost of their sanity! Just kidding! However, it's not really a joke, because many of us are still testing out how much we can handle, and I often still end up biting off more than I can chew. Chronic stress affects many at Bryn Mawr, inducing negative behavior and mentality, and sweeping some into a rut. From what I see of this campus, I think many people could stand to re-evaluate the way they are balancing work and play. What is life for if it is spent in misery?
In order for students to value balance and realize the importance of a positive mental state, the campus would have to be made more aware of the benefits to your physical and mental health and capabilities. Stressbusters during finals is always a great opportunity to realize the healing power of laughter and human company. But I feel like this campus needs stressbusters mid-semester also. It need not be college-sponsored, or anything necessarily grand, it just needs to give you that much needed laugh or get you away from the computer for a while.
Realistically, if this campus were going to shift toward valuing a more positive mental state, we may have to stop boasting about how much work we have and how we haven't slept in a month. Complaining and negativity cannot make things better, nor can competitively arguing with your friends about who has the worst life. However, our student body is not hopeless. I think people here are very open-minded and health-conscious, and would embrace the idea of raising awareness about mental health.
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The college experience is all about living in and being a part of different communities. From the first day here at Bryn Mawr you are almost placed into small communities depending on what dorm you end up living in, and even smaller ones depending on your customs group, but as time passes usually one ends up branching out into other communities present at the college. In all of these communities it is almost certain that tensions either will or do exist. Some tensions if used and handled in the correct manner can be put to good use, other tensions may have not so good of outcomes. To say that communities can exist particularly on a college campus without any tensions is to be naïve or blind of the realities that daily surround us.
I think that wanting this environment to be Utopian is simply setting ourselves up for a shocking world after Bryn Mawr which most likely is made up of not too comprehensive people who do not want to talk and do not really care about building communities and fostering them, or even just learning from others. I take the tensions felt on this college campus, look at the different ways in which they are solved, or handled, so that I could hopefully use not only my experiences and those shared by my peers in the future when I may be confronted with them once again. I think that if all of the communities here at Bryn Mawr looked at tensions as a way to further build communities that really understand each other, then we would be at a place where learning of all kinds is appreciated.
For me, another similarity between stress and mental state is motivation. When I'm having those bad days, it is often very difficult for me to really focus on what needs to be done. A similar thing happens when I'm feeling really stressed out. During these times, I tend to overthink problems, make assignments seems bigger (and scarier) than they actually are, and end up getting nothing accomplished. However, some stress is definitely a good thing for me. "Good/acute stress", the stress that disappears when the obstacle does, can be a wonderful motivator. It helps to set boundaries and to define what needs to be done. Thinking positively also really helps motivate myself and manage my time.
Sometimes, I think that it can be really difficult to maintain a positive mental state and manage to control one's stress at an institute as academically demanding as Bryn Mawr. Still, I think that there are some ways to accomplish it. Firstly, I think that talking about stress is one of the best and easiest ways to become more stressed. Often, when I overhear conversations about how much work someone has to do and how little time they have to do it, I find myself wondering why, then, are they wasting time talking about it when they could actually be working. It's like a vicious cycle: obsessing about being stressed causes more stress which causes someone to get much less accomplished than they could have. Discouraging people to talk about the amount of work they have/how stressed they are could be very helpful. Sometimes, it seems that we need to be reminded that being stressed is not a competition. It might also be helpful if the college would also offer some seminars/guidelines on basic time management. It can be very difficult to come from the highly structured life of high school and living with one's parents to the fairly open, liberal college life. Similarly, I think that college is really trying to provide some great de-stressing activities. Things such as yoga, massages, and "no-study zones" are great escapes during the often hectic exam time.
These speakers made it clear that balance is possible, even for students who often feel as though there is no time for anything but studying, homework, and papers. Something as simple as taking a walk after dinner is a way to incorporate fitness into your life while taking some time for yourself; setting aside time to do something fun that makes you feel positive about your life is also important; taking a moment to relieve stress ensures that it will not go out of control; and being part of a community is a way to contribute something to the environment around you - and, in a way, balance out the amount of time you spend worrying about all the work you have to do!
It is important for all members as individuals to belong to a community and to be active within it. "Living in community" and participating within a community is a responsibility. As discussed in class, every community has its own beliefs, norms, and expectations, and as such, community can be both empowering and disempowering. As a result of the different norms and values that a community can hold, there are many spaces for tensions and conflict. These tensions arise precisely because one community's norms, beliefs, and expectations are commonly accepted as "right" than another's or many others. Furthermore, other communities' sense of self and worth, which may differ from the wider community, feels threatened and undermined by these accepted norms. Dominating community norms, by nature of their acceptance, strength, and generalizability, are not perceived as dominating because they are widely accepted. It is almost as if "a community" (x) and its values becomes representative of "the community" (z) and its values, while all the other communities (t, u, y etc...) are being unrepresented or marginalized. Community X does not have to question its values, norms, or expectations precisely because it has the power and privilege not to have to think about them. With the notion of what is "right" and accepted (us) comes the notion of what is different and not as right (them). In the meanwhile, Community Y, which is part of the larger community (z), whose values are different is aware of the "dominating norms" and must justify and prove that its community's values are not only unrepresented and undermined by the larger community (z), but that they are valuable and essential to the over health of the wider community.
Achieving balance has many different aspects. Balance requires for the mind to be in positive mental state. According to Professor Cassidy, when in a positive mental state a person is able to focus more, comprehend better and is generally happy his/her life. This is essential to have because this forces you to be motivated by yourself. And this also helps with differentiating between positive and negative stress. Dr. Regie Jones states that stress is an essential part of life, but not all types of stress are good for us and our bodies. There is positive and negative stress, both of which help in achieving balance.
Positive stress helps to motivate by allowing us to look forward to something. Negative stress also helps with motivation because it helps us finish something that we started, but it also allows us to weigh out what is absolutely essential in our lives and which is not. For example for finals week getting the exams that are hard out of the way is a lot easier than waiting to the end because then the stress would be less while taking the easy exams. This way we weighed out the fact that it is most likely easier to take the easy test later because they do not require as much thought as the hard ones. Both of these allow us to achieve balance and have a happier life.
I do believe that a person can live a balanced life in Bryn Mawr. Whether it is, through exercise or finishing easy exams first, a person should make it a point to make themselves happy. Although balance is finding a common ground with all aspects of life, nothing can be done unless that person is happy with himself/herself. Also achieving balance can be possible if life is taken with perspective, seeing life as it is and accepting each obstacle with a stride. When a person does this than he or she is able to divide the stress that comes along with the obstacle into little bits, making it easier to handle and deal with.
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Kaari Pitts
Question #2: Why do tensions exist in communities, how is that tension useful and when is its too challenging? What can be done to gain a sense of mutuality with a community without giving up your individuality?
Bryn Mawr when compared to other schools of comparable size appears to be an extremely diverse institution. When perspective students visit, they learn that differences are heavily respected here, and that there is room for all types of people. It is indeed rare that such a place can exist, that people who chose to not bathe can co-exist with women who bathe on a daily basis, pro-lifers can speak to those who are pro-choice, and those individuals who choose to be naked, worship M. Carry Thomas or have an alternative lifestyle are all treated the same; equally and with tolerance. However, if the before mentioned is all true, then I have a question: What about those who fall within the cracks, those precious few who do not fit into categories, or in other words, what about people like me?
I believe that Bryn Mawr can be defined as a tolerant community, that is, tolerant of those on each side of extremes. Nevertheless I have found, especially within the minority community, if a person makes choices that do not fit the societal norms, then they are in a sense black-listed. For a fresh-woman, young and inexperienced, this form of ostracizing can cause great amounts of stress and tension. At Bryn Mawr, it is often difficult to retain a sense of individuality. Bryn Mawr morphs students in to people who live double lives. We have become secret agents, hiding our true agendas and lifestyles from prying eyes. Perhaps, learning personality dualism can be thought of as a benefit to tension, and if so, than those similar to myself have become masters of the art.
Tensions exist at Bryn Mawr for various reasons and the over-load of work, combined with various personalities often transforms Bryn Mawr into a battle field. However, my experience here Bryn Mawr is not always based on negativity. Bryn Mawr is a wonderful institution and I believe that the skills, the 'ologies and 'isms that I have learned here will aid me in any endeavor that I choose. I also believe that for the most part, the community here at Bryn Mawr is a great one, full of distinct personalities and extremely intelligent women, however, it is easy for women such as myself to feel lost, left within the cracks of Bryn Mawr life.
Balance – 1. the power or means to decide
The only problem with this definition of balance is that few people, at least those of whom I know, would be able to say that they lead a balanced life. Most people I know are poor time managers. Some days all they do is eat, sleep and watch TV, while the next week they can't eat or sleep or exercise because they have too much homework to do and cannot afford to spend their time doing anything else, even if it would help them. It is exactly this kind of imbalance in one's life that causes the "bad" stress that Reggie Jones was talking about. The bad stress then causes depression/ depression like symptoms, which in turn just leads to more imbalance. Imbalance can turn into a vicious cycle if it is not taken care of in time.
As Kim Cassidy informed us, this state of mind is what is also called a negative mental state. As it is stated above, part of being balanced is having a stable mental or psychological state, or a positive mental state, which makes people more efficient, better workers and more enthusiastic to learn new things. A positive mental state makes balance a more attainable goal and balance helps to promote a positive mental state.
However, there are more aspects to balance than just mental health. Physical health is just as equally important, and there must be an equilibrium between the two. As Jodie Law informed us, being in good physical health and exercising regularly help to achieve not only physical health, but in fact help to promote a positive mental state. Putting an hour aside every day, or every other day can make a big difference in the long run, and can help people come closer to achieving the seemingly impossible: balance.
Some people think that balance, or anything close to it, is not in fact an option here at Bryn Mawr. They have put themselves into the negative mental state of thinking that this college does not allow it's students time to do anything other than study. In fact, if these students would just change their thinking about it, they would find that they do in fact have enough time here, even with the difficult classes, to achieve something close to balance. If one thinks that one will have time to get everything done, then that person will make time to get everything done. I am a firm believer that achieving balance is a state of mind, and that it is definitely something that is possible here at Bryn Mawr College.
When we talk about balance it is important to look at the entire picture. This includes mind, body , emotions and any other aspects of life which are important to you. Just as we exercise our bodies, it is essential to make sure that these other facets of our being are well maintained and in good condition.
The body is a series of complex networks that work to make up you. When one of the links in the network is failing the others take up the slack. Just as when we used the yarn to exemplify community, the same can be said of the body. An example would be when we are sick, it is both a mental and physical thing. The state of one's mind can either aid or hinder in the healing process.
A positive mental state may be one tool that can help us keep our stress positive rather than negative. When you keep the overall picture in perspective it is much easier to manage your time and not get stuck in a pattern of being stressed about work but not doing it. Negative stress also might hinder one's ability to obtain and keep a positive mental state. I think that it is very important to understand how these two states interact; it really would demonstrate to people that it is not only good for you emotionally but also academically to have this positive mental state. I think to move the student population and culture toward that point we must involve both faculty and students. If students could be assured that although academics are important, that their mental health is equally valued then there would be a lot less pressure on students. That is, college is a place not just to grow academically, but also as a person. I feel that one way to foster this would be that freshman year (at least the first semester) grades would be pass/fail. That way you could learn not only how to do the work and what is expected of you, but it would also take the pressure off of freshman and therefore create a more positive environment, which in turn would make Bryn Mawr an environment which supported positive mental states. I think that this student culture would realistically be very shaky (it could easily relapse into the current state where negative stress predominates). It would be necessary for this environment (positive mental state one) to be constantly affirmed and nurtured by both students and faculty until it becomes the natural state on campus. Another thing I think could help is to have more off campus activities, this way people could get off this campus, which can feel very closed, and explore new things.
As individuals, we have a vital role in shaping the communities that we are a part of. The decisions that we make, the interactions that we have with other people and the way in which we choose to live our lives all have an impact upon our environment. No two people necessarily view the world in the same way, and therefore every community is distinct due to its very members. The interactions and actions that are produced by community members become to be what defines each community and serves to individuate one community from the next. Communities also come to be defined by the expectations of its members, the rules they set out for themselves and the values that they share.
Because people may have different perspectives on the world or approaches to their lives, there may often be disagreement and tensions may arise. Those on the fringes of a community may feel alienated while those in the majority cannot see the effects of their own actions. It is therefore important for community members to treat one another with respect and acknowledgment, despite whatever individual differences they may have. Although it may be uncomfortable to have to deal with tensions in relationships and within a community, disagreement can also be healthy and work to make the community a better one.
When there is an argument over a certain issue or action, people may often come to better understand and appreciate the different viewpoints of those in opposition to them. Tensions can be useful in expanding our own understanding of how we feel, while leading us to evaluate our own feelings and exploring our own perspectives. And by disagreeing with others within our own community, we learn to recognize what is important and what is not, and how to live with one another despite our differences. Tensions can thus be said to help mediate discussion, while leading people to understand the members of their own community in a better way.
On the other hand, tensions may often be too much for one community to handle. If a serious split in group thinking occurs, communities may often form sub-communities or break from one another entirely. This may occur when people realize that they are incapable of living together peacefully or when values conflict to the point of incompatibility. When mutual respect for one another is lost, tensions between group members may become too unbearable for the group to exist as the group it was previously. In this regard, tensions can come to define a group almost as much as peaceful interactions can. While there are some circumstances where it may be best for a community to go their separate ways, ideally communities will try to reconcile their differences in order to form a stronger sense of belonging and a greater appreciation of one another.
By providing each other with a sense of respect, communities may be able to bridge their differences and grow more cohesive. Fostering creative thinking, appreciation of others, as well as tolerance and acceptance, groups may grow closer while still recognizing the value of the differences that exist among its members. By recognizing that individuals are valuable because of their individuality, while coming together in celebration of the larger group, communities can create a supportive and caring environment for their members.
Throughout this course, we have been involved in a continual discussion of positivity and its impact on our stress levels and mental state. According to Reggie Jones, positive stress can encourage students to strive for a goal and achieve at their maximum potential which negative, chronic stress can cause students to feel apathetic and unable to control their own lives. Negative stress has many symptoms which overlap with depression, suggesting that negative stress can trigger depression. Conversely, positive stress has many consequences which are strikingly similar to those described by Professor Cassidy when she spoke about the benefits of a positive mental state. This suggest that some positive stress is necessary to put humans into a positive mental state.
We have the highest positive mental state when we feel as if we are useful and can be depended on to complete some specialized tasks. In this state, we have a sense of purpose, and take pleasure in fulfilling that purpose. It is important to carefully examine the attributes that are associated with a positive mental state if we are to change our own behavior as a student body to reflect a more positive mental atmosphere. Each student, in this case, need to move individually towards valuing a more positive mental state, and therefore value positive stress and encourage other student to reflect on and talk about their stress in a more positive light.
Realistically, this would require students to deal individually with the negative stress that they were experiencing. Currently, I think students use their peers as "Purge Receptors", or places where they can dump everything negative that is affecting them at the moment. By talking about and sharing their negative stress levels, students feel that they are not alone in their struggles. But to some degree, this approach backfires and in stead of feeling companionship, students feel that there is negative stress overpowering the entire community.
I think the way to stop the culture of negative stress is by changing the direction of student conversations at Bryn Mawr instead of rescripting them entirely. Students will always talk about work, because it is the main component of their lives as students. But students can change the way that they look at the volume of work, both individually and in the community at large, and look upon it as something that the students do to prove themselves at this institution of higher learning. The volume of work, and thus the stress, is what sets us apart and transforms us from what we were in high school into what it is that we envision ourselves as being in the future. This way of considering and talking about our stress is very positive: as our badge of honor, and our vehicle into becoming whatever it is we want to become.
Realistically, the change must be a slow one and must start by changing individual perceptions. This does not require students to stop talking about their work, but it does require them to change the way they talk about their work. Personally, this course had made me hyperaware of the comments that I make on an everyday basis, and it has been my struggle to change that. I hope the change that I have made is permanent, and I see that in my friend group, the more that I talk about stress positively, the more others start to see their own stress positively as well. I think it is a change that can be made, particularly in the Bryn Mawr culture, and it is one we should be striving for, both individually and as a community.
Natalie Inozil 4/29/2004
Living in a Community
Diversity of perspectives challenge students own views, which leads them to question what they have learned thus far. This can force them to grow, encompassing the newly learned perspectives or it can stunt their growth by putting them on defense, which creates a tension in the community. This is internalized and acted upon, which may cause others to be offended. The perceived offense leads people to stay within their comfort zones stunting their growth and the rest of the community.
Staying in your comfort zone or group of friends causes tension on campus at times. Students usually are friends with other students whom they can relax with comfortably with little to no tensions arising. This creates what some name as cliques, a narrow exclusive group of people, often held together by common interests, views, or purposes. This makes some students feel uncomfortable. Some feel like outsiders others feel like insiders. Some feel lost and alone other are found in enclaves with friends that makes the school more homely. Upon entering the dinning hall you will see the team members and cultural groups sit together. This might be seen as negative, but people hang out with people that they have something in common with. This is useful because it gives students an opportunity to be at ease while still adding to the diversity of perspectives in the classroom .This by no means suggests cliques are exclusive. The nonexclusive and friendly characteristics of the women on campus are visible when you allow yourself to open up to the 'cliques'. The perceived difference keeps people away and robs them of the opportunity to have a fruitful conversation and possibly make a friend.
Everyone must help ease the tension diversity created in the community. Each member of the community has a role to show the same respect to others that they themselves want in return. This will help the institution become a safe place for people to step out of their comfort zones and gain insight through new perspectives and friendships.
Living in community is a challenging responsibility, communities are defined by values, norms, rules, codes, expectations etc. Why do tensions exist in communities, how is that tension useful and when is it too challenging? What can be done to gain a sense of mutuality within a community without giving up your individuality?
Living in a community is all about compromise. We must make sacrifices; we cannot always get what we want. Our goals and personal desires must sometimes be sublimated for the good of the group. It is this responsibility to compromise that makes living in a community a challenge.
The tension within a community is useful because it acts as a signal. It is a metaphorical ¡°Hey, look at me! There¡¯s something wrong here!¡± Tension helps us to isolate problems and fix them. A rule may need to be change; an expectation may no longer be viable within the group. Something needs to be done, since at least some members of the community feel that they are being ignored or their problem dismissed.
For example, the recent tension regarding marriage is a signal that something must be done about the issue. It must be addressed by the larger community, because the tension is reaching a boiling point. This example may also illustrate a situation that is too challenging. This is a national tension, one that may never be resolved to the satisfaction of all involved.
Part of living in a community is giving up something of yourself. You give back to the community when you can ¨C through work, or community service, or personal interests. You give up time and effort in order to make your world a better place. In this way, you become a part of something outside yourself; you are part of the community you serve.
Yet, our individuality is important. By giving to the community, you sacrifice something of yourself. But since this sacrifice benefits the community in which you live, you also gain the benefits. It is in choosing what sacrifice to make that we define our individuality. Those choices are the ones that make us who we are, that force us to choose what is most important to us.
For example, I am part of a small community within Bryn Mawr¡¯s campus: the Owl Investment Group. In that community, I give up my time and effort in order to make the group a success. However, those sacrifices enrich my life. I wouldn¡¯t be the person I am today without them.
In reality, I think that a community is a give and take proposition. It takes from us and it gives back to us. We are the only ones who can determine how much it gives and takes, however. I think it all depends on our level of involvement in the community.
Balance is all about what is important to you. What do you like to do? What do you like to spend your time on? Those are the things that define balance to you. If you like it, you will figure out a way to incorporate it into your life (assuming that you are a healthy, rational adult).
It is undeniable that living in a community, especially one as concentrated as the community of a small liberal arts college, where a student's entire life (academic, social, residential) revolves around the campus and community, is a challenge and something that can be difficult to adjust to or keep from becoming a situation where conflicts arise. Especially at Bryn Mawr where we have a social honor code in addition to an academic honor code, the community life can be tense and difficult to deal with. That said, there are many things about being in a community such as this one that are wonderful and make our college experience what it is. Everyone at Bryn Mawr chose to come to this school, knowing that community is very important and a vital part of being a Bryn Mawr student. Without community, there would be less of a difference between small liberal arts colleges and large universities. Our community keeps us from getting swallowed up and almost invisible, and it is very nice to recognize every face on campus and have professors who know their students.
The challenges of being immersed in a close knit community such as the one here at Bryn Mawr are numerous. For one, there is always a great deal of "drama" because everyone knows each other, and people always know what is going on in the lives of other people, even if they are not friends with them. No one likes their personal business being common knowledge, and I think that that is something that can potentially happen in a community as small as ours. Also, in any community, no matter the size, it is always difficult to be respectful of everybody and avoid stepping on toes. People are going to feel disrespected at some point in a college community for so many reasons: stealing food from the fridge, using someone's shampoo, not respecting quiet hours, the theft of computers, wallets, etc., making comments that make people uncomfortable, not making great enough efforts towards diversity, a conflict between roommates, not getting along with your customs group, breaking up with someone who lives on your hall, and so forth. We expect everyone to treat each other in the "right" way, but the fact is that even with only 1,300 people, one is going to find a wide range of values and beliefs that not everyone shares, and from this stems inevitable tension.
The tension is positive however, because it can keep people thinking about whether they are behaving appropriately and respecting everyone in the community. If we had no tension from living in a community, it would either mean that we were living in a utopia, or that there was no sense of community whatsoever, and the whole campus would be fragmented and chaotic. The tension keeps the community together, reminding us that people still need their personal space and that there are boundaries that cannot and should not be crossed, but that nonetheless, we would not have those concerns (that personal space would be invaded, boundaries crossed, etc.) if we were not already a community.
As for gaining a sense of mutuality within a community, without giving up ones individuality, I think that there are several things that make it possible. For one, having our own rooms (or the prospect of getting ones own room) makes a big difference. I think that in order for such a small and concentrated community to work, physical personal space is very important. In other words, people need a space that they can call their own, where they can go to escape the community if they need to or want to. I'm not advocating that people become reclusive – just that it is sometimes important to separate yourself from everything going on in the Bryn Mawr community. That we are all interested in different things and are very different people, and entered Bryn Mawr with this being the case, is another thing that contributes to being able to retain our individuality. Not much is needed to gain a sense of mutuality, because there is already so much in place to make sure that we do feel like a community. Things such as traditions, activities, athletics, and the fact that we are all women and all at the same school.
Full Name: Amna Shamim
Username: ashamim@brynmawr.edu
Title: Living in Community
Date: 2004-04-26 18:19:19
Message Id: 9606
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
and Film - 2004
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Living in a community is a challenging responsibility, one which we most likely never stop to think about as, except for the rare hermit, we all live in many communities throughout our lives. As children, we lived in the communities of our family, our neighborhood, our school and any other activities we might have engaged in such as sports teams or social clubs. These communities were easy to adjust to because they were the communities we were raised in. There was automatic acceptance simply for being who we were, without any need to consciously conform to the community because it was the community who shaped our growth as a person.
Full Name: Marisha Banerji
Username: mbanerji@brynmawr.edu
Title: Living in Community
Date: 2004-04-26 19:42:51
Message Id: 9610
Paper Text:
Marisha Banerji
Amy Campbell
Women Living Well:Seminar
Human beings are inherently social, a condition (and state of mind) that leads them to live in groups rather than alone or in small families. The development of such groups has been instrumental to the formation of social stuctures in human history and thus to the eventual development of civilisation itself. These groups are a feature of all human societies whatever their differences. We all live in communities and could not live without them. So it is essential to our well-being to make them function.
At its source, a lot of this tension springs from the expectation of conformity imposed by a comunity upon its members. It is thus important for communities to realise that it is important for it's members to have some acknowledgement of their individual needs (such as catering to vegans). At the same time individual members must be willing to compromise some of their wishes in order to live with others.Compromise is the key.
Full Name: Kate Tucker
Username: ktucker@brynmawr.edu
Title: Women Living Well in Communities
Date: 2004-04-27 20:15:03
Message Id: 9655
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Full Name: Jessica Knapp
Username: jknapp@brynmawr.edu
Title: Diversity and Tension at Bryn Mawr
Date: 2004-04-28 16:26:01
Message Id: 9668
Paper Text:
Over the past four years, I have been able to immerse myself in the unique, challenging, and exciting community that is Bryn Mawr College. Right now, I am a senior who is looking back on her time in college, trying to gain some sort of understanding of what I've done, how I've grown, and what I've learned. Of course, academics are central to our time in college, but the creation and sustaining of community is also imperative in describing life as a Bryn Mawr student.
Full Name: Michele Drejka
Username: mdrejka@brynmawr.edu
Title: Complaining and Being Stressed: The Famous Bryn Mawr Pastime
Date: 2004-04-29 09:44:16
Message Id: 9678
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Full Name: Yinnette Sano
Username: ysano@brynmawr.edu
Title: Living In Communities
Date: 2004-04-29 09:47:48
Message Id: 9679
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Living in Communities
Tensions on college campuses are almost inevitable simply because of what a college campus is and how it is made up. You have a large number of young people coming from a diversity of places, and having had a certain type of experience their whole lives with thoughts, ideas, and beliefs that have been shaped by the communities they were once a part of, all put together to cohabitate. The result of this are communities within communities which in some cases serve as support systems, and in other instances serve as places where mutual learning is taking place. Tensions in many cases exist because of both the spoken, and the unspoken realities that are parts of students. What I mean by spoken realities are those conversations which are either started or ended by a comment that was taken the wrong way, or that was not phrased correctly, or that was deemed ignorant by some and just plain normal by others. The comments and how one reacts to them greatly reflect where the person is coming from. If anything the experience of tension can allow the beginnings of a dialog which would foster understanding or it could be the ending of that kind of dialog for good. The outcome of tensions is greatly swayed by the way in which they are handled. Of course there are tensions that are more complicated and that as a result involve a different kind of approach or different strategies in order to solve or come to an agreement. I think that tensions need to exist in college communities such as Bryn Mawr.
Full Name: Kathleen R. Feno
Username: kfeno@brynmawr.edu
Title: Stress and Mental State
Date: 2004-04-29 09:59:10
Message Id: 9681
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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I think that the relationship between stress and mental state is a very close and intense one. Both things have the ability to affect the things around you as well as physical health. For example, we talked about he various "symptoms" of chronic stress. This included excess sleep, lack of appetitie or over-eating, irritability and feeling tired all of the time. Similarly, I think that such symptoms can – and do! – occur in people who are in a bad frame of mind, regardless of the reason. Also, while I'm not sure that one definitely causes the other, I think that either can exacerbate the problem. When I'm feeling particularly stressed out, I find it very difficult to remain positive. There have been a number of occasions in which bad stress led to feelings of panic which led to negative feelings about myself (and, sometimes, everything around me) which, in turn, led me to really doubt myself and my capabilites. Similarly, when I'm having an "off-day", that is, I'm in a bad mood/ negative mental state, I find that I'm apt to become more stressed much more easily.
Full Name: Ana Salzberg
Username: asalzber@brynmawr.edu
Title: Balance at Bryn Mawr
Date: 2004-04-29 11:16:14
Message Id: 9684
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Over the past four sessions of Women Living Well, speakers have discussed a variety of topics: We have learned about maintaining a positive attitude, creating a suitable fitness routine, the good-and-bad of stress, and how to make an impact in a community. The common thread between these four lectures is the idea of balance in one's life - how to define it, how to achieve it, and how to maintain it (particularly in an environment as stressful as Bryn Mawr).
For me, balance is defined as a kind of equilibrium between the things you want to do and the things you have to do. I have always thought about balance in terms of give-and-take, a variation on the saying "You have to play as hard as you work." Yet after listening to the four lecturers, it is clear that balance is something to strive for in all areas of life - and as it is all-encompassing, the idea of balance requires more than a simple definition. Jody Law encouraged us to incorporate fitness into our daily routine, so that it would be another way to balance out the various academic activities we often have to pursue; Professor Cassidy talked about how a positive mental state increased our ability to overcome the stresses in daily life; Reggie Jones discussed how the negative aspects of stress itself can be balanced out by its tendency to motivate us; and Dean Martin spoke about how responsibilities in communities are balanced by the people who comprise them.
We also saw how balance is essential to our ability to be productive. Professor Cassidy was very enlightening in her discussion of the importance of a positive mental state when trying to achieve balance, especially when she read the data that showed how a positive mind-set enabled people to become better problem-solvers. Jody Law also made it clear that in the long run, taking part in some physical activity will enhance our quality of life. Reggie Jones helped us see that unless you make time to balance out the stress in your daily life, you run the risk of having it compromise your ability to be productive. Finally, Dean Martin conveyed that it is helpful to expand our lives by taking part in a community, so that we do not become totally absorbed in our own worries.
Overall, the Women Living Well lectures made it clear that balance does not just happen automatically in our lives; rather, it is necessary to make a conscious decision to achieve a sense of balance. Whether you find it by developing a fitness routine, taking time to read a book, or taking an active role in the community that surrounds you, balance is an essential part of a healthy, productive life. Certainly it is not always easy to make time to find and maintain that balance, but like anything worth having, it is worth working for.
Full Name: Paula Andrea Arboleda
Username: parboled@brynmawr.edu
Title: What Does It Mean to Live in a Community?
Date: 2004-04-29 21:36:07
Message Id: 9690
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
and Film - 2004
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Tensions exist and are exacerbated because smaller communities do not feel that they are being engaged or asked to participate in discussions, projects, decision making etc... by the larger community. Rather, the perception is that the larger dominating community (norms) is asking the smaller communities "to learn and to play the game." They are not being asked to reshape or influence the game. This process can be represented by the following statements: "This is what we are playing and this is how we play it. Vs. This is what we usually play and this is how we usually play it, but how can we do it differently or what other game would you like to play." These types of tensions are always present. The question is how can it be managed better and how can these communities engage in dialogue in a productive and constructive way? How can we reconceptualize the "game" so as to think of the problems and solutions differently? I would argue that the existence of these tensions or of other ones must be acknowledged first before they can be tackled and dealt with appropriately. These tensions are not negative per se, but they can become destructive when they are not addressed. Smaller communities within the larger framework of "living in community" must be engaged and must be perceived as valuable to the health and vibrancy of the larger one. In order for these various communities to come together and engage in dialogue and action, there must be a discussion of these dominating norms and some recognition of the game, its existence, and its prevalence.
Full Name: Suhali Kundu
Username: skundu@brynmawr.edu
Title: Balance in Bryn Mawr?
Date: 2004-04-29 22:59:41
Message Id: 9691
Paper Text:
According to The Webster's dictionary the definition of balance is mental or emotional stability, a condition in which different elements are equal or in the correct proportions. (Webster 84). Balance to me is finding a common ground between work and play. It is being in a state of comfort where stress is minimal and all the aspects of life have been taken into perspective for it not to disrupt the state of equilibrium within the body. One of the hardest places to achieve balance is within a college environment. College is the last stepping stone before the reality of life hits, it is a community where being stress is the norm and being without balance is expected.
The other thing that helps with achieving balance is giving your time to 'play'. For example exercising, this is a perfect way to get rid of excess energy, stress, also to clear your mind of trivial information. As Coach Law said exercising releases certain hormones, which allows us to think more clearly, make us more observant and more relaxed. If your physical fitness is maintained than it is a lot easier to achieve balance in your hectic college life. In college especially in Bryn Mawr, it is hard to maintain your physical well being because along with the other work it seems impossible to exercise.
Women, Sport,
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Full Name: Kaari Pitts
Username: N_rosanova@yahoo.com
Title: Tensions, Communities and Bryn Mawr
Date: 2004-04-30 02:06:06
Message Id: 9693
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
and Film - 2004
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Instructor: Amy Campbell
Class: Women Living Well
Final Paper
4. 30. 04
Full Name: Adina Cazaban
Username: acazaban@brynmawr.edu
Title: Achieving Balance
Date: 2004-04-30 06:38:34
Message Id: 9694
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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2. a stable mental or psychological state; emotional stability
- www.dictionary.com
For me, balance is very similar to the above definition. Balance means being able to have time to do all of the things that are important to you, from eating and sleeping, working and doing school work, exercising and relaxing. Balance also includes doing things that you might not want to do, but that are good for you and therefore must be done, such as eating a well balanced meal instead of a lot of junk food, or staying in shape by exercising instead of being a couch potato and sitting in front of the TV for hours at a time, which is something that I, at least, have been compelled to do on many previous occasions. A very simplified definition of balance would really just be being able to manage your time well.
Full Name: Fritz-Laure Dubuisson
Username: fdubuiss@brynmawr.edu
Title: A Balanced Life
Date: 2004-04-30 10:00:55
Message Id: 9695
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Balance is hard to maintain. It takes practice and a true understanding of ones self to understand what you need. Balance, as we have demonstrated in our web postings, means different things depending on who you ask. But we all can admit that we need it in our lives.
It is imperative that we take care of our bodies and minds. These are the vehicle through which we experience life. In taking good care of them we are enhancing our potential quality of life. Also through good maintenance to body learns how to positively react to stress. In times of good stress, the well maintained mind and body act in accordance to what is need. When dealing with bad stress, the mind can create alternatives which can work to alleviate the stressful situation.
By learning how to deal with our good and bad stress it becomes easier to deal with ourselves as well as other people. Through this self discipline a sense of community can be built and maintained.
At Bryn Mawr College, the student who can maintain a balanced lifestyle is commended on one hand and questioned on the other. Here it is good to maintain a balanced life, but many on campus do not understand how this can be done without either missing out on something or continuing to maintaining a rigorous academic schedule. Those who have found balance here learn how to prioritize. And that seems to be the hardest thing. Learning how to weed out the ultimately necessary from what can be done at another time.
For me balance equals a life which I am content with. One which includes friends family and other loved ones. It is also very important to take time out for yourself. Sometimes it is also good to just do nothing. That can mean different things but they are all about relaxing and contentment.
Full Name: Johanna Segal
Username: jsegal@brynmawr.edu
Title: Essay question 1
Date: 2004-04-30 11:26:31
Message Id: 9697
Paper Text:
Professor Cassidy talked about the idea of a positive mental state; a positive mental state is very important and useful when trying to balance your life. Professor Cassidy told us that a positive mental state not only makes a person happier, but also a better student; this might seem contradictory since you are presumably taking extra time for fun or relaxing activities, however by doing this you can concentrate better on the work you do. A positive mental state effects all aspects of your life; it means being physically healthy from exercise to eating right, leaving time for academics and also leaving time for fun, social activities. By doing this and achieving a balance we can feel much more positive in out everyday lives. Dr. Jones talked about positive and negative stress. Negative stress is stress that either makes us sick, is chronic or makes us feel constantly overwhelmed. Positive stress on the other hand can help to motivate us to do work or take care of other important tasks.
Full Name: keta porter
Username: kporter@brynmawr.edu
Title: essay # 3
Date: 2004-04-30 14:10:11
Message Id: 9698
Paper Text:
Within the Bryn Mawr community as well as all college communities, it is very difficult for students to have balance within their lives. It is almost expected to not have balance because it is the time of your life where you do things that shape your future. It is the time to experiment and learn about certain concepts like balance. I think of balance as having an equal distribution of work and play in order to minimize stress and have a positive mental state.
The main reason for the lack of balance in the lives of college students is stress. We learned that it is the way that we look at the stress that we have in our lives that makes us not achieve balance. We never looked at some stress as being good stress. We always thought that all stress was bad. The good stress acts as a motivator to get things done because there might be something good in the end that's going to come from dealing with that stress. I admit that I only think of the bad stress and it times that can be detrimental to my positive mental state. Like Reggie said, bad stress makes a person feel helpless in most situations. I do feel helpless when I get into situations where the stress is bad. I always forget that stress is necessary in life. It adds character to our lives because without it there would be no variation in the tempo of our everyday lives.
To achieve balance in my life, I designate days where I will not do any work. I would just spend my time doing nothing productive. When I get really stressed, I always try to incorporate some physical activity into my routine in order to get the blood flowing through my body. I feel a lot better when I work out because a lot of stress is gone.
Full Name: Katherine Quah
Username: kquah@brynmawr.edu
Title: Final Paper--Question #2
Date: 2004-04-30 14:40:23
Message Id: 9700
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Full Name: Kat McCormick
Username: kmccormi@brynmawr.edu
Title: Enacting a Positive Change
Date: 2004-04-30 15:54:02
Message Id: 9703
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Full Name: Natalie Inozil
Username: ninozil@brynmawr.edu
Title: Living in a Community
Date: 2004-04-30 15:54:59
Message Id: 9704
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Women Living Well
Professor Amy Campbell
In an effort to accomplishing the many goals of Bryn Mawr College tension arises in the community. Though there are many benefits to having a varied student body, it comes at a high cost. Tension arises because what is different is usually beyond you intellectual grasp. But when an effort is made to comprehend members of you community and make each others feel comfortable the tension that arrives from diversity is intellectually beneficial to the community.
Full Name: Faye McGrath
Username: fmcgrath@brynmawr.edu
Title: Answer #2
Date: 2004-04-30 15:56:06
Message Id: 9705
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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When we live in a community, we gain something that is more than the sum of its parts. If everyone works together, then we all reap the benefits. Communities exist to service our needs and wants, but we must be prepared to give something back. We must be prepared to live within the rules and expectations that define the community.
Full Name: Faye McGrath
Username: fmcgrath@brynmawr.edu
Title: Answer #3
Date: 2004-04-30 15:57:23
Message Id: 9706
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Physical fitness is a part of being balanced. Even those that agree with me when I say that I hate exercise should be able to agree that a fit body goes along with being a balanced person. Without being fit, you cannot do or achieve all that you are capable of. You run the risk of health problems and stress related issues. Fitness helps your body itself be balanced. Your stress level is reduced and your risk of physical difficulties is diminished. With a healthy body, you can work more on having a healthy mind and heart.
More than being physically fit, balance is also about being mentally fit. It is about having time for both work and play, and being able to do both without completely sacrificing the other. Mental balance is about keeping a positive mental state, always looking at how to improve things rather than examining how they are bad.
Beyond keeping a positive mental state, balance is walking that fine line between good and bad stress. You want stress to keep you motivated and on track. You need it in order to function at your best. Without that stress to keep you out there, doing what you need to do, you would achieve nothing and would never be able to have balance. But, the opposite ¨C too much stress ¨C can be even worse than none at all. With too much bad stress, you also cannot get your work done; you are frozen into a stress-statue.
Balance, essentially, is about balance ¨C keeping the areas of your life that you need to survive and thrive constantly in your life. This means that while you live in a community, some part of your balance equation is devoted to the groups you are a part of, some of the equation is devoted to you. It is up to you to determine the amounts that go in each side.
Living at Bryn Mawr for the past four years has taught me one thing: Balance is a big, fat lie. No matter what you do, balance is not a completely achievable state. It is, instead, a goal, a destination. And, after four years, I regret to say I am no closer to achieving it then the day I started.
Full Name: Elsa Marvel
Username: emarvel@brynmawr.edu
Title: Living in a Community
Date: 2004-04-30 16:43:24
Message Id: 9707
Paper Text:
Women, Sport,
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Full Name: asdadasd
Username: dsdasdui@dfghj.com
Title: sadasdas
Date: 2004-07-02 02:10:12
Message Id: 10252
Paper Text:
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